Hi everyone, I desperately need to lose a LOT of weight but tbh I don't know where to start. I saw my DR back in September I think for help with my anxiety issues and she referred me to a weight loss councilor and I finally have my first appointment with her this thursday. I am super nervous and have no idea what to expect.
Anyway I'm 25, I have a 3 year old son and I have lost all confidence. I am a massive size 28 and my anxiety is driving me up the wall, and everyday i convince I will have a heart attack during the night and not wake up. I am an emotional binge eater and I have no idea how to ration myself. It doesn't matter what i eat, it could be a salad and i will keep going and going until I've finished what's in front of me or until i feel stuffed.
Exercise wise I've been walking an hour a day on preschool runs since september and I thought that might help me feel fitter but it hasn't.

Sorry i have ranted on and really just wanted to say Hi.

Hi :-)

You've already got a start place, going to see the councilor is a great place to start!

With the portion sizes, I'm the same, I just eat until I've finished, and if there is a 'help yourself' sort of dinner, I just keep helping myself til it's all gone :-/

This may sound obvious but I have found that using a smaller plate helps so much, I have bought a plate that's a lot smaller than my usual plates, still dish my other halfs up on those, but I have mine on the smaller plate and it's about half as much as what I was having before - but I still feel full after it, and I've finished what is in front of me :-)

Give it a go and see if it works x

to 3FC!

It's okay to feel unsure. Many of us started off that way, and continue to learn as we go.

For me, the easiest way to ration myself was to calorie-count. How?

- Figure out how often a day you want to eat (some people choose 3 meals, others choose 6, some have snacks, others don't) and how many calories will you eat per day
- Decide on a starting calorie range (often depends on your starting weight)
- Keep your calories balanced per meal. For me, an easy way to do this was to eat 3 meals a day with about 500 calories per meal (under was fine, but I was wary of going over).
- Have some snacks in mind for when you get hungry between meals. High protein, low calorie snacks tend to keep us full longer, but I've eaten fruit as snacks as well if my mealtime was approaching. Keep snacks below 150 cals.

There are websites you can use to keep track of your daily meals and calorie intake. The two I've heard of are My Plate and Fit Day (and I imagine there are others if you ask around at the calorie counting threads ). It's not necessary but can be helpful.

Also,

- Use measuring spoons (not cutlery) to measure anything you add to your food - ketchup, oils, dressings, honey, sugar, jam, peanut/nut butters, cream, milk, etc. The reason is that some of these can have a deceptively high amount of calories. Consider the two dressings in my fridge. One has 25 calories per tablespoon, the other has 90!
- Drink plenty of water
- Sleep well if possible
- Keep yourself mentally committed... Coming here helps keep me on track! It's a mental reminder that really helps solidify the commitment. Whether it's posting on daily chat threads where others check in regularly, scrolling through old posts to learn what others have done or asked about, the goal photo album area, etc. This website is a HUGE source of information at your fingertips and people are more than willing to offer support, advice, or a friendly nod.
- Commitment is key. You don't have to stay on plan 100% of the time. In fact, most of us slip up. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING (I cannot stress this enough) is to not give up if that happens. Extra calories one day mean absolutely nothing in the long run. Extra calories every day over time is what leads to weight gain. So be consistent with your commitment, but don't demand perfection. Accept what happens and choose to move forward using the tools you have to lose weight.
- You can absolutely do this! And it only gets easier and more rewarding as you go.

wow thank you both for the tips, I have my counseling session today and although I am nervous I am looking forward to it

OK so i've been to therapy... she wan't a weight councillor as i was told, just a general one. It was OK, I can't really describe how i felt about it. She went straight for my life as a child and i was in tears in minutes. I have anxiety issues too so i'm sure it will help. My only concern is that she looks and sounds a lot like Carol from The Walking Dead! One of my fave shows btw but it was a bit weird lol

Good for you! Therapy sure isn't easy, but it can be immensely rewarding.

Stick with it.

Small changes, no matter how small they may seem, do add up!

You're very brave to have made this decision. Emotional eating can cause real problems in peoples lives.

For the exercise, the walking is really good for you. You might not notice it, but it really is working for you. Any form of exercise is better than no exercise at all.

I read a dieting tip a while back, where after every bite of your meal, you put your cutlery down and take a sip of water. I'm not sure if it works, but it's worth a try.

I wish you all the best on your journey.

I always support and encourage people who are losing weight / going to give it a go.

Just be consistent, believe you can do it, set up an environment/supportive people (for me it was removing all soft drinks and chocolates around the house) where it can happen. But if you fall of the bandwagon don't be upset, just make sure you start again next meal

wow more replies thanks for the support

I am eating much better this week, I have a green smoothie in the morning to replace my usual coffee and cereal. My dr said to try and avoid caffiene and I'm loving the smoothies at the min. For lunch I am having ryvita with salad or something similar. And dinner time has typically been chicken and veg with rice or potatoes, smaller portions than usual too and double veg than anything else. Payday is coming up so I will be buying new scales and stocking up on more exciting healthy food. Any snacks I have are either a boiled egg or a small handful of walnuts. I'm only drinking water too.

I also started Zumba this week, I found a beginners one on youtube and it's actually quite fun

You can do it!
my advice would be to take it as slowly as you want. If you can even start making healthier choices, which it sounds like you are, that is an enormous step. Little steps really do add up.

I think belovedspirit had great advice - most important is to forgive yourself for slip ups and just try to do better. A bad meal, day, or even week won't stop your journey in the long run. The only thing that will stop it is giving up.

thanks for this conversation

Hello beautiful (because you are, no matter how you feel). i hear you! i actually work with ladies like you, who feel stuck and lost and i was there myself. my experience was quite crazy; from anorexia to binging and more unhealthy habits! i was an absolute mess! I felt worthless and overcompensated by trying to be everyone's friend, party animal; organiser etc. I didn't love myself so i didn't share my true self. i also had anxiety and felt quite lost. i was living my life for about 16 years, trying to get back to my anorexia weight but meanwhile i was putting on weight! crazy right? This is why, when i actually found the solution and started loving myself and the food i eat, i studied to become a coach and started my business Live Lean Health. I wanted to make a difference as i didn't have the guidance needed. I know it is hard to start when we think of too many things we need to change but how about making small changes? This is where i excel! there are a great event in Hyde Park on Monday 27th , where one can learn about healthy foods and weight loss without spending more money than needed and in fact, probably changing! Anyway! Congratulations for taking the step to ask for help; this is normally the hardest part; but it is worth it as change is about to come! LOVE yourself; you are beautiful and you will get where you want to! xxx

Aww thank you, I am still about on here, normally on the slimming world thread. I started sw almost 3 months ago, it's been a struggle but I have lost 21lbs so far . I only managed one councilling session, the only time they could squeeze me in was 15 minutes after the time I had to drop my son off at nursery and the doctors is 25 minutes away so it wasn't possible and she wasn't amused if I was late but I'm feeling alot more positive now anyway so I don't think I really needed it that much x

Sorry to hear about the problems you are having. I used to be very depressed by my size when I was obese and it was awful.

If you want to change and lose weight do it gradually. Start first by getting rid of all processed foods, then reduce your grains, then reduce your sugar and then reduce your dairy. Then if needed reduce your portion sizes. And at the same time exercise at home.

The benefit of your size is that you burn a lot of calories based on your BMI so even doing some You Tube light aerobic videos will burn a lot of calories.

In the end you want it to be where you have loads of vegetables with every meal you eat and that you are eating quality food rather than processed.