Ok, people, third little post in a row there and I haven't even really "joined" the thread. I posted this on the other threads and just thought someone here might enjoy it. I just think it's a great quote, think of this when you're beaten down by life and in danger of losing sight of your dreams. . .

* * * * * * *

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all.

Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach.

Check your road and the nature of your battle.

The world you desired can be won.

It exists,

it is real,

it is possible,

it is YOURS."

(Ayn Rand)

* * * * * * *

Good morning to all. Its a beautiful day in the neighbor hood. Okay, i woke up this morning with hubby singing the Mr. Rogers song. He's such a great guy.

Redballoon, i see you are in Tokyo. My son was an exchange student in Japan about 8 years ago. He met his now wife there who was also an exchange student. When Will came back a year later, he had changed considerably. His social skills had improved and he was no longer a child/man but this responsible adult. Gosh darn good looking to.

I agree with you Tricia. This SANCTUARY is a great place to be. I think of it as having a lot of good friends at my fingertips. I've only been here about a month but it has changed my whole outlook on life and the struggles i have with losing weight. Telling people about my ups and downs of daily routine events helps tremendously, but i have also found that reading about how other people go through the same ups and downs helps me feel like I'm not the only one in the boat and the boat is not sinking.

My food consumption this week has been good but the exercise thing has been almost nonexistent. Went to the Y on sunday and i think i might have pulled a muscle because my side hurt come monday morning. I took monday off so i wouldn't do any more damage, come tuesday, it was cold and windy so didn't go into the pool or do any kind of exercising. No excuse for that one. Yesterday (Wednesday) it was cold, rainy and nasty. Still no exercise. I am starting to wonder what is going on with me.

Cheyrll, did you get my message?

How was your walk Andria? I find it amazing how a good walk, fresh air and good music can do wonders for the sole.

Have to get this day started so will ta ta for now.
Gloria

Hey everyone

Good morning! The walk yesterday was really good. I made it a mile again! That makes twice since surgery. I'm not sure if I could do it again today. My leg swelled some yesterday and stayed that way through the rest of the day. I'm going to ask for Tony's input on that one, but common sense says to walk a shorter distance.

The day had a really interesting end. I was called in to work from 6-11:30. When I arrived, the girls were in the middle of a goodbye group. Four girls are graduating our program today, and they have this huge group where the graduating student says something to each girl and the girls say something to her. It was really tender, and I felt honored to be there. One of the girls graduating is a favorite of mine. She really touched my heart, and it is hard to see her go, even though I am truly happy for her. The best thing about this goodbye group is that the student is also allowed to say something to staff and we are allowed to say something to her in return. I was sobbing so hard when she told me how much she loves me and how much of an impact I have had on her life. You can't stop tears like that from running down your face.

I slept in this morning, and my day needs to get moving! The work rotation starts again tonight, plus I want to attend that graduation ceremony this evening. Busy day ahead of me... Blah! I want to stay home and be a vegetable!

Andria

Gloria, I got your message. Thanks for sharing. I sent you another private message.

Also, I'm on my 5th day of counting calories on my nutricounter and I've lost 4 lbs.
Plus, I've exercised 3 days so far this week. I feel like my spirit has been lifted and feel more in control. I have had cravings today for sweets, though. Really bad. I sometimes buy those little bags of snack cookies that are 100 cal. a bag. today I had some choc. cookies and dipped them in sugar free pudding snack. tot. cal. 160.
This weekend will be the real test. We are having people over for cards on frid. night and our euchre club meets on sat. night. Everyone brings tons of food. I must be strong. I am making a big plate of fruit, and some other low cal snack to nibble on.
Plus one of my weight watcher recipies for choc. peanut butter pie. It's made with low fat choc. ice cream. only 170 cal. Hopefully I will not endulge in all the other junk food.

Anyway, I have to work tonight. honor society is having a big spaghetti dinner tonight for parents and I will be cooking the food.

Gotta go.
Cheryll

Hello all!

Andria, I know just how you feel. My knee doesn't give me much trouble but I do get occasional swelling. Probably not as bad as you since you so recently had your surgery but certainly enough to be annoying. I usually just switch my exercise to something with less impact, like riding a bike. The worst part is that I know whatever exercise I've done isn't the culprit - it's the weight my poor knees have to withstand while I do that exercise! I never do anything with high impact but when you are overweight there isn't such a thing as NO impact. Oh, well, just one more thing to add to the list of reasons I HAVE to keep going.

Okay, guys. I took my first yoga/pilates class this morning. It was a good workout but, I gotta say, I didn't love it like everyone else seems to. No reason really. I think I've just programed myself to need that "winded" feel when I'm done exercising. I'm going to keep going to the class though. Like I said, it was a good workout and I may grow to like it more as I get more accustom to the stances and all. Anyway, went to the yoga/pilates class then stayed for a low impact aerobics class, walked on the treadmill for 10 minutes and then did my weights. I LOVE doing my exercise before lunch. It doesn't feel like such a chore for some reason. Maybe because I'm not juggling quite so much around the time.

And I am proud to report that we met Greg for lunch at the club and I did really well. I had a small cup of vegetable beef soup and a small side salad. I did have regular ranch dressing (they don't have light and I DON'T like vinegarettes on salad) but I measured out 1 tablespoon so not too much damage was done. Just as we were getting ready to leave a group of ladies (all tan, thin, and fit) came in from playing tennis and were seated behind us. Of the six, three ordered cheeseburgers and fries (the burgers there are 1/2 lb and AWESOME), one ordered a Cobb salad which is loaded with bacon, cheese, eggs, etc., one ordered a Philly CheeseSteak with fries, and the other fried chicken strips (6 per order) and fries. I have to tell you, it was all I could do not to stay long enough to see if they ate it all. Of course, it is none of my business, but I am facinated by people who seemingly eat whatever they want and stay trim. I guess SEEMINGLY is the key word. I have to keep reminding myself of that.

It is time for me to start getting some after school snacks together. Hope you all have terrific afternoon!

Tricia

Tricia, my husband is one of those people who can eat anything and not gain an ounce. He has been like that since the day we were married and its so frustrating to see him eating ice cream every night. I know that if the junk food were not in the house, i wouldn't eat it. When i try to hide it from myself, he gets upset because he cant find it. One day he wanted to know where the oreo's were. "Top shelf in the pantry, behind the mixing bowls and napkins". He ended up taking everything down just to find them. Can you tell i LOVE oreo's and milk?

Did not exercise today. Just cant get myself jump started. Have any of you been through this? I was doing so good and i read all your post how your walking and doing yoga/pilates classes and here i am, nothing. Maybe tomorrow i will start again.

Have to get supper started so will sine off.
Gloria

Oh, Gloria, I know just what you mean. Greg is the same way. And when he does put on a few pounds you can't tell. Then when he decides to lose it - BAM - it is gone without me ever knowing he was ever trying to lose. And without a step of exercise.

I absolutely go through phases when I just don't want to exercise. I just try to remember that it isn't usually the workout that I don't want to do. It's the getting changed, putting on my shoes, driving there, that I don't feel like. Only on very rare occasions have I forced myself to the gym and not felt good when I was done and left wondering why on Earth I didn't want to go in the first place. There is that rare trip, though, when I get there and my heart just isn't in it. I don't work as hard or as long but I give myself credit for doing SOMETHING. Nobody is 100% all of the time. I just try to remember that the longer I put it off the harder it is going to be. And, if I take too much time off I've effectively wasted all of the effort I've done so far because it doesn't take long to lose the stamina and strength I've built.

My inlaws are coming down to visit in April. I am trying to plan ahead because I know it will be a challenge to keep up my good work in the food department. I consider myself very close to them, especially my MIL, but even after 9 years of marriage I feel like I have to impress them. And since cooking is my best talent I like to make all of our southern favorites. On top of that, they are going to keep the kids for a few days during their stay so that Greg and I can get away together. I can't wait but I'm already trying to find something that we can do that won't revovle around food. It has been a long time that I planned an outing that didn't! It has always been about what favorite restaraunt we can vist, etc. I guess this is the type of stuff the experts are talking about when they speak of lifestyle changes opposed to diets, huh?

Talk to you all in the morning!
Tricia

I have a problem that i would like your thoughts on. I have an aunt (my fathers sister) whom i talk to by way of I.M. buddy. We started talking to each other this way about three years ago and she has helped me deal with my feelings about my father. We never had any long conversations face to face till i invited her to come and visit us here in Florida last year. When she came down, i discovered that her mannerisms are just like my father. My aunt even sounds like my dad. When she was here all i wanted to do was scream and tell her to shut up! Now, when i talk to her by way of the computer, all i can think of is a female version of my dad. I don't know what to do. She is a nice lady, but my childhood was bad enough when i went through it, i don't want to relive it again every time i talk to her. Also, before she came down and we talked through the I.M. buddy, all we ever talked about was my dad, now that i am starting to deal with my anger, she still just wants to talk about how rotten things were when i was little. Even when i try to change the subject, she brings us back to the same topic.

Do you have any advice for me?
Gloria

Hey! I have a lot of catching up to do....gonna read everything and be back later!

Like Kat, I have to catch up - but I just got home from the dentist and have to let the Advil kick in first!!! You wouldn't want to hear what I have to say now!!!! OUCH...

Tricia, i was going to respond to your post but now i cant find it. Is anyone else having trouble or is it just me?
Gloria

It isn't you Gloria, I deleted it. I came back later and re-read my post and, while I meant all that I said, I realized that some of it was stuff that I wouldn't have wanted my in-laws to read. I know they would never actually find their way here but I felt like if it wasn't something I would be comfortable with them seeing then it isn't post on a public forum. Sort of the old rule if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all. I wanted to rethink what I had to say and try to make my point without being so critical of my FIL.

I think that you may have to be politely blunt to your aunt and tell her that you don't want to discuss your childhood with her anymore. Make sure she knows that you may want her to be there for you eventually but, for now, you need to do it on your own. She may be addressing her own history through you. Perhaps the apple didn't fall far from the tree and she has similar memories of her own, maybe even directly related to your dad instead of hers.

I don't have any advice as to being irritated by her mannerisms, etc. But I bet they won't bother you as much once you've come to terms with the relationship you had with your dad. I think it has to be similar to when you lose someone that you love any reminder of them will bring tears to your eyes. But as you come to grips with the loss, memories don't have the same emotional impact. They may be just as potent but we react to them differently as time goes by. So, maybe once you've gotten to a more comfortable place emotionally you won't have such a strong reaction to the similarities she shares with your father.

You are doing the right thing by facing your feelings head on. It will take a lot of courage and a lot of work. But you are up to the task and will emerge a stronger more empowered woman in the end.

Now, on a diet and fitness note - I went shopping today. I decided that the reason I am relying so heavily on the scale is because I haven't been able to see my progress since I'm still swallowed up clothes in too big of sizes. I didn't get much, just a pair of pants and a new pair of boots. But, the pants were size 12 and are actually fairly loose. Wouldn't have been able to fit a 10 yet though, darn it. Anyway, it was just the pick me up I needed. It felt really good to go out (I had a Mary Kay party to attend) and feel comfortable and confident in how I looked. I had a lot of compliments and that also made me feel good. It was all just what I needed. I have to admit I think I was starting to run out of steam. I wasn't ready to give up but I didn't want to jump through all of the hoops for what seemed like nothing either. So, I've talked to Greg and he has agreed to hang out with the kids tomorrow so that I can do a little more shopping. I don't want much - just a few outfits so that I can feel good about all of the hard work I'm doing. I can't believe I am actually looking forward to it. Shopping hasn't been enjoyable for me in a long, long time. I tell you, being short AND fat does not make finding clothes any fun!

Have a good night, everyone!
Tricia

apologize,apologize,apologize,apologize,apologize, apologize!!!!!!

I haven't been reminding everyone about the 2 LBS IN 2 WEEKS CHALLENGE and it has gotten "lost"

So in a effort to redeem myself, please post or PM me your losses for Feb 7 to Feb 21st and Feb 21 to Mar 7th.

This two week 2 LBS IN 2 WEEKS CHALLENGE:

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2 LBS IN 2 WEEKS CHALLENGE (2x2) Mar 8th to Mar 22nd
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