Hey MissyK - don't worry about the food, the main thing is you didn't keep going and decide I might as well double that amount! Sometimes it doesn't even make a difference in your weight, so once in awhile I say just have fun and start back with the healthy food tomorrow.
I want a digital camera too! But you are right they are expensive and I'm not sure I want to blow the money on one right now. I am thinking to ask my ex to help me pick one out because he has an electronics store and could probably get me a deal on it! haha
On that note, I had a very long talk with him the other night like from 11 pm - 3:30 am. We finally put closure to a lot of issues that have occured and he was saying things like "I'm not sure I am ready to give up on you yet" and he thinks our trip to Montreal may help us sort things out and so on. It is really such an odd situation I think. As much as I want to be with him, I know there will still be problems but for now I am not going to over-analyze like I always do, and just go and have a blast on the weekend.
When all this happened with him and it looked like there was NO chance, I thought of you MissyK...If it is possible for me to have another chance with him (and seriously no one could have predicted this because it appeared over and done with to the extreme) - I would say don't give up - There is always that chance!

I just got up so I havent eaten anything today b/c I just got up but yesterday's eating went ok. I never write it down anymore so I can never recap it here, but you know what, today I will and I shall write it here for you guys tomorrow.
At night when I want to go downstairs and eat something before bed, I just tell myself "lie down and try to go to sleep and then if you realllllly still want something, have it" Every single time I lie down and forget about food. I start thinking about things and people and so on and I fall asleep, no questions asked! So it's kind of like a deal with myself to try sleeping instead of eating and it always works. I am never usually hungry then anyways, I just feel like nibbling.

I'm FINALLY 110lbs!!! AND I have 3 days before school!!!

I weighed myself after eating all this:
B: toast and fruit
L: beef, rice and italian spaghetti sauce
D: BBQ rib sandwich and fries

I don't think I could have EVER done it without this thread! You guys are great! We have to stick together! We'll get to our goals, no matter how long it takes!!!

And Cyndy, thanks for helping me out with my guy problems! Your encouragement means so much to me. Honestly. So anyway, I'm glad you had a chance to talk to him...you're much more fortunate than me.

MissyK, you are my IDOL. CONGRATULATIONS for an amazing job with your weight loss. Girl, you got it - you're absolutely amazing. I am in extreme envy of you! But I also know how hard you have been working to get to this point. Would you say you still had a few "mess up" days and if so, why do you think you were still able to lose weight? One other question that I am wondering - Do you think looking back that for most of the time you have gone hungry or not too bad. I am asking because if it was really hard to stick to your diet how do you feel about maintenance? (Of course you will do just fine because your a pro at this! and we all know its a matter of keeping it up). Lastly, at what rate did you lose per week?

Anyways, if you weighed after all that food, then in all likelihood you weigh LESS than 110 lbs because the weight of the food and beverages you had during the day would increase it.

I just got home from my trip to Montreal and I am tired! But I think I'm still headin out tonight because might as well take advantage of my time off before school. One more night of partying!

Today I was not hungry at all. I didnt eat in the morning b/c i had to pack and in the car ride I simply just didnt have an appetite. I got a Tim Hortons small iced cappacino made with milk. Just before for dinner I went with my friend to Licks and got their veggie burger and fries. And I didn't finish the fries. I am very proud of myself lately for trying to follow my hunger cues and waiting until I am hungry to eat, and not overeating when I do. I wonder what my weight is like after this weekend. We'll see tomorrow!

Alrighty girls, so I weighed myself this morning for the heck of it, because I havent in awhile and I wanted to see what the junk food and alcohol in Montreal did to me!
Well, apparently it was good for me LOL. Okay maybe not good, but I never overate and I am down to 132 or 133 lbs! That is another 2 pounds gone. I had to weigh a couple times because I thought I was seeing things. It is very exciting. But also scary. I don't mean to be pessimistic, but I have this fear like what if today I can't do what I did yesterday. What if it was just a fluke and I start going crazy eating waay too much or something. I know it sounds stupid, but I havent been successful in so long that it's an unfamiliar feeling. But thinking on it, I am down roughly 7 or 8 pounds and it wasn't ever very hard. Small changes people. hehehe. LIke number one, I just stopped the aimless snacking at night. Easy change, big results.

CONGRADULATIONS ON LOSING THE WEIGHT!!!!!!
haha. hey girlies. sorry i havent talked to you in a while. i just got bac from maryland with my friend. i ate a lot. i just forgot about my diet and ate whatever my skinny friend ate. oh well. haha. i started school. its ok. hey i saw a cute guy!!! :D haha. hes a lot cuter lookin than the other guy!!! haha. i have to strt up my diet again tomorrow. i have to lose these pounds before i go crazy! :dizzy: haha. well i have to go get my lunch ready for school tomorrow! ttyl.

-kaitikat

That's gotta be the first time anyone's ever called me their "idol".

THANKS, GIRLS!!!

GLad to hear you girls had fun on your trip! Don't worry about the 2lbs, Kaitikat. You can lose it EASILY, girl! Nowww go mack on the cute guy lol!!!

Cyndy, you have no idea how happy I am to hear about your loss! Honestly. It makes me so happy that my weight loss buddy is LOSING weight!!! :smug:

WEll, it didn't work out between me and the guy...but another guy asked me out. I said no. THen he went and won me a big stuffie at the fair and forced me to keep it. Gaaaad I don't like him though! I hate good looking guys. They put me through **** in highschool, and even though this guy is super nice, I just can't accept him! What to do?

OH, and to answer the questions:

I honestly don't know how much I lost per week. First, I was never good 7 days a week. Secondly, I didn't weigh myself weekly. I'd go into periods of "I'm not on a diet anymore" sometimes as well.

Don't be pessimistic. Don't think that you have to do today what you did yesterday...that's now how we live life. The key is to choose a healthy lifestyle that's flexible and satisfying.

The only thing I can say for sure is that I stopped my late night binges. YES, small changes DO make a big difference, don't they?

As for maintenance, it's really not as hard as others say it is. You'll notice that your appetite shrinks after a while. I just feel...well I guess "dirty, stinky, ugly" after eating lots now.

I just think back...2 months ago I was sitting on the bus contemplating how long it would take me to get to 110lbs. Just think about the last time you were thinking about how long it'd take you to lose 5lbs. Well, you've lost more than that now. That time in between is really nothing. Just don't keep weighing yourself...I learned that the hard way.

School starts tomorrow! Aaaah!!!

Thank you so much for advice, MissyK. It's funny how everything you say makes sooo much more sense then when I hear it from others. You just really know what you're doing and I am incredibly grateful to have your support.

So this guy you are talking about....why don't you like him back...just not your type, or is he one of the guy's that gave you **** in highschool? If he is a nice guy and you are attracted to him, maybe it is worth it to give it a try? All I know is I would die to meet another good looking, very nice guy because there is no cure for a broken heart like finding someone else, seriously. I don't think things will ever work out between me and my ex, and I don't want to believe that but I need to have a more realistic view. In the past, I was only able to move on from someone I really wanted to be with by finding someone better. Or at least try. I am still waiting for someone else to come around...

One thing...all that pessimistic thinking did me NO good yesterday. I ate so much food, didn't keep track, at a lot at night (something I never do anymore) and I just feel AWFUL this morning. Ah geez. Well it's a new day and I am ready to make it good without giving a second thought to my screw up yesterday. And I didn't weight myself b/c it'd be too depressing to see the weight gained back even temporarily by water etc. But one day surely can't make me permanaently gain back the 2-3 lbs.

I have been lacking in fruits and veggies lately so I really want to try and incorporate more of them today.

ANyways, I have a dentist appointment and then off to develop some pictures. School starts for me tomorrow because luckily I don't have class on Tuesdays!

Thanks again for tips. I think yet again I'll be printing out your response. I just find it so motivating.

hey girlies. my diet is doing well. i guess. i weighed myself today in the morning and i weighed 112 and a couple notches. not bad! haha.
today i ate...

a bran muffin...breakfast
a salad...lunch
a granola bar...lunch
carb control yogurt...lunch
some low fat pringles...snack after school
chicken and broccoli...dinnner (is that how you spell it?! haha.)

ill talk to you later girlies.

-kaitikat :ink: (isnt it cute?!? haha.)

Hey girls!

I haven't been good lately. Well, I've been having lots of FUN, but with FUN comes CALORIES. Oh well...what's four or five days of junk food? :( probably a pound? I don't dare weigh myself, though. I was SORT of good today:

B: Toast w/ cream cheese, nectarine
L: rice, vegetables and chicken
D: Chicken breast, thigh and drumstick >_< oh I am TOO full!!!
S: 6 small plums

I think that's about 1600 calories.

Thanks for the advice, Cyndy. But I don't think things will ever work out between the guy and I as well. I'll try to move on...but I definitely can't accept someone else. At least, not for now. Even in the midst of partying with close friends, I can't help but feel like crying because of my utter hopelessness. Just the other day, I cried on the bus.

We should fill our emotional void with weight loss, I suppose.

hey girls! i just got bac from school...uhh boring! 7 hours of stupid things! haha. my diet is going alright. i still havent lost those pounds...im sure you guys are like...''wats taking her so long!!!'' haha. i treat myself. a lot. haha.
well i have to go do homework...ttyl!

-kaitikat

Hey girls...

Well I have not been doing so well lately. I guess I avoid posting when I feel like a failure and it's embarrassing, and I don't want to let you guys down. But this is what has been happening.
I read a couple books in the summer by Jean Antonello called How to Become Naturally Thin By Eating More and Breaking out of Food Jail. They are excellent sources of information and ring very true, but they are also anti-diet. To make a long story short, ever since I read them it was hard to forget what I learned from it, that being, diets make you fatter in the end. And I know this is true from statistics and my own experience. I am much bigger now than when I started dieting in grade 7. You see, I wanted to try and see if I could get out of the diet mentality but in order to recover according to the book, is you must start eating when you're hungry but because we have been so out of tune with our body signals it can be difficult, and most people have to gain weight before they lose it naturally. I started to gain weight and realize I am not strong enough because I am totally freaked out and feel like I can't stop eating now...Sorry this must be totally confusing...

I just feel like I am at a complete loss. I want to know what it would feel like for once in my life to be as thin I have always wanted to be. But I also think that I guess I just don't want it badly enough or I would have accomplished it by now. I suppose the motivation isn't as high as it should be and therefore I can't do it. I don't know. All I know is that in thinking of all this I almost started crying on the train. I am in disbelief, or denial, in the fat person I really have become. Guys it just makes me sick. Why did I let myself get like this??

Are you guys prepared to watch everything you eat till the day you die? Because I am not sure I can do that. I am so terribly sorry for such a whiney post but I have never been so confused. I just almost know that restricting my food down to 1200 or even 1500 cals doesnt work for me anymore...I just get so hungry and binge....and then I think, well, years ago I was never more motivated, I was obsessed with my weight and still could not get it below 120 lbs...how could I possibly do it now with waaaay less motivation?

I think you two are the most incredible woman for being able to do it. I don't even comprehend how you could. I admire you with everything in me.

I don't know where I am going with this, but I had to let it out because it is stressing me out big-time. MissyK, maybe I should follow your lead and fill my emotional void with weight loss. God knows, I have a big void, as things are also non-existent with my ex. We didn't end up getting back together. Not to make it sound like I feel sorry for myself, but seriously I have no idea why he even weht for me in the first place, because he is the type who is kinda superficial, like he works out EVERY day at the gym no matter what time and I saw pictures of his ex girlfriends and I am not joking she had a model's body, in fact he then told me she used to model...I was just sinking in my chair....eeeeeek life sux for me right now.....

I apologize once more for my self absorbed ramble here. Thanks for listening MissyK and Kaitikat.

Oh my goodness. I came online to tell you guys how horribly I've been doing. I've been avoiding this thread as well, because I didn't want to disappoint you girls. But I can't help it. I feel like a complete failure. I must have had over 3000 calories today because I felt so...lonely. My stomach hurts like a b*tch right now, too.

I was on such a roll when I thought I had hope with the guy I liked. But now that things are also non-existant, I've just let myself go. Over these few days I must of gained 1-2 lbs...I can see it in my face. I want a way out of this dieting mentality. Before, I was so clear on what I was doing. But now, I just eat for the heck of eating. I've lost weight, and I'm happy. But I feel like I'm on my way back to gaining weight...like before. I can so EASILY gain 5lbs in two days it scares me. That's what happened to me in the past.

I'd like to eat normally...but I just can't anymore. I'd eat normally, and follow the normal meal with a WHOLE box of Pot of Gold (today). I just feel like poop.

I don't know where to turn...I'm so close to my goal, yet I can't help but drift away. I don't know exactly WHY I'm doing this to myself.

I hope we can get through this together. I wish I was as cheerful as you, Kaitikat. And Cyndy, I'm gonna send you a PM...otherwise I'd never end this post.

HEY girls!

I'm sO tired today! I had school, then work. But hey...I didn't overeat today! I know, because my heart isn't beating super fast and my stomach isn't hurting.

B: oatmeal w/ brown sugar
L: snack size oreos (I know I'm bad...but it was under 300 cal per bag)
D: tuna/salmon roll, avocado roll, california roll (about 250 cal each)

So...I had about 1300 cals today? And guess what?! I was TOTALLY FULL!

Hehe now I'm off to SLEEP!!!

Sorry that Im barging into your guys private chat thing, But I was reading through it and you guys kinda sound like where I am at, with my weight and dieting and stuff. I was wondering if I could join your chat?
lol, i feel kinda stupid asking if I can join, hehe....Its alright if i guys dont want me to tho...

Well Im 15 yrs old, and in grade 10.
Im a dancer/gymnast. I weigh around 126 :mad: right now...but im hoping to get down to 100-105. and Im 5 ft 2.

Hi Blondie77! I personally have absolutely no problem if you would like to join in. We are all very supportive here and just want to help each other out. I think I speak on all our behalves saying "welcome to the group!" hehe

We could use all the encouragement and support possible because healthy eating, lifestyle changes and losing weight are one of the hardest battles to fight.

Look forward to learning more about you :)

Thank you guys so much for letting me join, lol. I know how hard it is to lose weight and support really does help.

Well I went to a party tonight and I had some chips and stuff. And a few candies. Supper was pasta, so I filled up on salad and just had like 1/2 c. of pasta. But then of course there was cake, but tomorrow i am going to be really healthy and just eat minimally.

Today I made a few 'motivational posters' as to speak. I made one that is like a chart thingy. I will keep it on the fridge in the kitchen and have to go through it everytime I enter the kitchen. At the top it says 'Are you truly hungry?' then there are Yes and No, At No it says Leave the Kitchen Now!!!!! and Yes says Drink 2 glasses of water then Leave the kitchen.THen its like still hungry? yes, no....and yes says to eat sum cut up veggies and then its like drink more water and then its have some fruit and yogurt and then at the end it just says LEAVE THE KITCHEN NOW before you give in!!!
I made another one with some skinny gymnasts on it, and it has questions like, do u want to be skinny? are u willing to make some sacrifices (cutting out junk) to lose weight? Do you want to feel confident? and other ones like those, and then its like, if YES is the answer to any one of these, then leave the kitchen.

Lol, yea well I just blabbed about nothing, sorry! i got a little excited about my little system tho, hehe.

Well I've gotta go, mom just came home with groceries (healthy foods! we dont buy junk anymore cuz she is trying to help me with my weightloss)

Oh my goodness, blondie!! You are SO smart! I think I'll make those posters right now. Ok, tomorrow...because I have homework to do.
Welcome to our chat! We're SO super nice here, and we DO help eachother out! Just feel free to say anything here, whether it's related to weight or not. Cyndy and I tend to talk about our personal lives here too, hehe.
At any rate, we're all trying to get to our goal, so we'll give eachother all the support we need.
I ate quite a bit today, but I'm not feeling too guilty, because it wasn't like I ate because I was bored. I went out for lunch and dinner...and they happened to be high in calorie. Oh well.
yeah, our stats are VERY similar! Notice we're all 5"2 tall?
So what are your eating habits like, blondie?

MissyK...I just have to comment on the pic you have under you screen name...is that you!?!?!?! If so, if I do say so myself...you have a HOT body LOL!!!! Seriously, though, if I am correct in assuming that is you, congrats because you couldnt possibly look any better...can you sense the envy in my voice haha ;)

hey girlies sorry i havent talked to in a while...ive been so busy with school...uhhh. diet is going pretty well. im STILL trying to lose these stupid pounds. but then again ive been eating whatever i want lately...thats not good! i have to lose these pounds before i go crazy!!! :dizzy: haha. well i have to go do some things...ttyl!

-kaitikat

thanks, Cyndy. Yes, it is me. But it's me
a) sucking it in until it hurts
b) standing in the dark to take an inch off each side of my body
c) wearing my "Indian Rose" brand new jeans that make me look like I have hips when in reality my silhouette is two parallel lines.

ahaha and you've yet to see my butt, where most of my fat distributes itself.

I put that up there because I've been working out my stomach the most for 2 months, and I'm proud of the little bit of definition.

I'd put my face up there but then again...I hate my face. Hehe.

So today, I've decided that I have to eat more to lose. Otherwise, I'd feel deprived. I've been reading the posts here at 3fc, and eating 6 small meals a day seems to do the trick for people.

So far:

B: coffee :coffee: , oatmeal and brown sugar (not substitute sugar this time), and bowl of grapes.

Tonight I'm going to work on getting toned. I measured and found out I lost 3 inches off my waist (30 before, now 27) since the 10lbs.

Well today I am doing fairly well with my eating.
I had:
B: silhouette plain fat free yogurt w/ 20 grapes and Splenda
L: whole wheat pita w/ canned light tuna and fat free cheese
Snack: roasted chickpeas (some crazy thing i've tried) 15 pistachios

This school year i've been trying some really crazy food things, very unordinary, my friends always make fun of my new ideas, lol, because they are so healthy and weird.

Like I've been bringing lettuce wraps w/ lunch meat and cheese and mustard. Like the lunchmeat and stuff is wrapped around a large lettuce leaf.

And i've been making Ricotta creme for dessert from the South Beach diet, its just light ricotta cheese and splenda and vanilla.

ya well, I'll ttyl!

Hey Blondie I don't think that is weird at all...in fact I have done just about all those myself! (love the roasted chick peas ;) )

well the rest of my day eating wise was pretty bad, I had an extremely bad gymnastics practice and so i was just really pissed off and extremely upset and disappointed with myself. so, not thinking in the car on the way home, i ate like half a candy bar and then had like an entire bowl on jello when i got home (luckily it was the sugar free stuff) and then like an apple and peanut butter...but oh well. Im gunna make meal plans for the week tonight or tomorrow. I am determined to stick to em 2!!!

I saw on a post somewhere else on this site they were having a challenge thing with points and i had an idea Why don't we have a little contest thing with our little chat group. We could like each make a personal meal plan for the next day and then hafta follow it. Like we will each limit ourselves to so many calories each day. And set goals for drinking water and exercise each day. Then we will like get points or lose points for each daily goal we achieve/fail....and at the end of the week we will see how each of us did...just a thought! Let me know if u guys wanna give it a try sumtime!!

Hey girls!

Sorry I dont have much time to write, I gotta be out the door in one hour and I have to get ready and so on...buuuut
Blondie - I think that is a wonderful idea. Goal setting can be very beneficial if even we dont set x amount of pounds, just the goal of sticking to a certain plan, certain # of calories, drinking your water, exercising...whatever your personal goal are!
We should do that sometime :)
Anyhoo I gotta run............I hope you all eat healthy and have a great day!

Guys I need your hellllpppp....pleeeeease.....

I didn't have a great eating day, but it wasn't like AWFUL...just started overeating when I felt stressed before but then stopped. Now I just want to go downstairs and eat my kitchen clean but it's only because I feel "I've already blown it, I might as well go all the way". But it is this thinking that got me this fat in the first place. It is so hard for me to stop a binge once i've started eating way more than I know I should have.

At the very least I was wise enough to post here for support before going and stuffing my face.

How do you guys stop yourself from eating more when you feel like you've blown. There is always room for damage control and I know from past experience that stopping before a huge eating extravaganza makes a difference...but how do I not let myself eat any more!!?!?! Thank you!

gosh...if I knew how to stop, I wouldn't have just gone to Mcdonalds today after having an apple strudel AND chocolate chip cookie for lunch.
I guess the thing to keep in mind is that occasionally, even skinny people eat lots. It's really not the end of the world if we go over our daily goal of 1400 calories. That's just the amount of calories that we consume to lose weight. As long as you don't binge often, it's ok.
My advice is to drink (immediately) 8 cups of water. Yes, it'll hurt. BUT, trust me...you WON'T want to eat afterward. And you'll get that full feeling from after a huge binge-fest. You know...that "ow I'm going to burst" feeling.
WEll, my book "7 secrets of slim people" came today. I'm hoping it'll cure my eating disorder (because I seriously have binge-eating disorder). If not, I'll probably go to Chapters and look for a book written specifically for binge eaters.

Thank you for the advice MissyK, I am definitely going to try that one for next time (probably tonight the way I'm going!).
I do feel much better this morning, and I weighed myself (bad idea after a bad eating day) but at the very least I am still not back up to my highest.
I hope you guys dont mind if I post here a few times periodically throughout the day because I am home from school today and basically sit in front of my computer doing work all day. Although, I do have a dentist appointment and have to take my dogs to the vet :) the highlight of my day LOL

Anyways, the reason I want to post here a few times is to keep track, even if for one freakin' day, what I eat. If I feel accountable to tell somebody, then maybe I will think twice before going off and eating way more than I should.

My goal is 1600 calories. I know that may sound like a lot but keep in mind I am basically starting over and I do weigh the most out of all you guys (*face red in embarassment*). But I dont want to make my target too low and then mess up.

Well I am trying to evenly space out my cals:

Breakfast:
Mock "pancakes"
That consists of ground up oatmeal, 1 egg and a grated apple. A little light sour cream and maple syrup on top.
Coffee with skim milk

Total: 375

Okay, please someone tell me if it is too annoying to continually read my posts and I will lay off a bit.

I guess you could say I am experimenting a bit. I have an extremely hard time dieting. So at this point just tracking what I do and see what my patterns look like I may be able to figure out what the heck I am doing and what works best for the future. I realize that during this tracking phase I might not lose weight, but thats ok with me right now so long as I figure out a system that will work for me forever.

I tend to get very hungry mid-morning. So I went downstairs a couple hours after my last post and ate - quite a bit - but then I remembered I promised myself I would write it down here - so without further ado, here it goes -

the rest of the pancakes - 60
yogurt - 75
bowl of bran cereal w/ half a banana - 230
non-fat/white sugar free muffin - 200

Total: 565

I thought I had binged, but 565 isn't absolutely terrible (for me). I feel better now, b/c my tummy was grumbling before. We'll see how long it takes before I get hungry again, and I plan on making a soup which is very low in calories. So that may be lunch. I'll keep you updated on how this day goes. I feel like a scientist on a weird treck trying to discover something lol.

Hey guys,
well baaaaaaaad news...Im back up close to my highest weight :( :( :(
Like 130....I dont know how it happened either...But anyways, I got some books in the mail from Chapters last night, one is "Diet for Dancers" and the toher is the "Dancer Body Book"....there is info on nutrition for dancers n such...and a few meal plans for 1000 cal, 1,350 and 1,600cal diets. So I've started to read thru those and I think I might try following the meal plans...the only thing is they were published back in like 1990 and 1984 and a alot of nutritional and dieting weightloss research has happened since then...but I'll give it go anwyays!
i AM DESPERATE TO LOSE THIS WEIGHT...
my teacher keeps telling me I have to get thinner. I have been on vacation and gained weight since she last saw me...and she will be expecting to see me thinner this weekend :mad: :(

aghhhhhh...so frustrating....

I was at home all day too. I didn't overeat, though. My book arrived!!! I'll be posting inspirational quotes when I come across them.
Could the 4lbs be due to water, or time of the month, Blondie? I hope so.
So far, I've read the first 4 chapters (instead of doing my homework).

Girls, get this:

"For every deprivation, there is an equal and opposite binge, sooner or later" -Roth, Geenen

This book basically talks about the need to listen to our BODIES, not our MINDS about eating. Think of a baby. It doesn't eat after it's full, does it? It turns away from the bottle. We were all born with the natural ability to eat the right amount of food. But due to external influences (learned eating behaviours, dieting, emotional eating), our minds tell us to eat even though our bodies don't want anymore food. That's "overeating".

That's what I've learned so far. Just thought I'd share.

Cyndy, that recipe sounds GREAT! Can you give it to me w/ more details? I can't cook hehe.

So, I "listened to my body" today.

B: oatmeal, grapes
L: 6 beef dumplings
D: 4 potstickers, beef noodles, vegetables
S: Kinetix protein bar, apple

I'd say that's about 1450 calories. Not bad. I didn't count calories as I was eating. I just asked myself, "am I full?"

I can really live like this. It does feel like I'm controlling myself, though...but I'm sure I'll eventually return to normal eating habits. I just don't want to binge ever again in my life! I've gained 1lb, (not water weight, but FAT) due to the binge fest I've been having over this little while. But HEY. You live and learn.

Hi Girls,

First off, get ready for a super long post. You may want to grab yourself a coffee (to keep you awake!) and make sure you're in a comfy chair :)

I need to talk to you about something I have come to realize, and explain why you will be seeing less of me around here.

I wouldn't even bother posting this, but I have grown really close to you and appreciate the kindness and support I receive here so much. I especially want to say thank you for the acceptance you have all shown.

I don't really know where to start explaining what I am talking about, it is nothing bad, nor sad. But I feel like I need to explain to the best of my ability why I need to stop this obsession of mine.

I will quote a little from my diary entry this morning that I wrote on the train. To begin, last night I was saying a prayer before going to sleep, or rather just talking to God, myself, however you want to view it. I trying to figure out this weight "issue". It had dawned on me right there and then that I have spent almost half of my entire life spending just about every single day concerned with my body, what I am eating, how much I weigh. I suppose that would be okay if it led to a permanent change and it did not bother me. But that is not the case. I am worse off then when I started about 10 years ago. So much of my thought patterns is devoted to not only losing weight, but trying to figure out ways to "normalize" myself, eat "properly", stop binging and so on.

As of today, I give up dieting, trying to lose weight, thinking so much about the whole diet/health/exercise lifestyle - it has done nothing for me! I mean it - truly, madly, deeply. If I have spent so much time at it and have not got it right yet, it is never going to happen. It makes it eat more, I think about how I can do it, I struggle against my own body, it makes me depressed a lot, too. I especially can't force myself to undereat after reading "How to become Naturally Thin by Eating More" by Jean Antonello and being a part of that forum board. But even at that, an anti-diet approach, I don't want to be part of it either. I want OUT, I want my life back, I want freedom.
I want to pick up at 11 or 12 years old when I started with this whole 'eating less' ordeal (and I was sadly even a skinny to normal weight kid) but I thought cutting back to carrots and celery at lunch time would make me thinner - totally bizarre. I think MissyK, you quoted Geneen Roth saying "for every deprivation there is an equal and opposite binge." I testify to that 100%. I am curvy now and I didn't have to be - had I not interfered with my body's natural hunger and fullness signals I would probably be a good 20 pounds thinner because naturally I was never heavy.

I have given up dieting many time and tried to follow my own body's cues and it would work for awhile but something would eventually throw me off again. I was still obsessed with the idea of losing weight. This time is different for me. I don't give a sh*t anymore about this utter craziness (to me, not you guys - you are able to handle it much differently than me). I am forcing myself to give up every diet/food/exercise forum board that i belong to on the internet, as even the "healthy" ones have not helped me out. Well, many did teach me more about being different foods and the dangers/consequences of dieting and a lot of information health-wise. But, I think, sometimes you are better off knowing less. Stick to the basics. Yes, it is intriguing to me to learn the how's and why's of certain food combinations and so on, but the technicalities could drive one crazy. There is TOO much information and thinking rationally here, it is all a little crazy. I dont believe any of this will help me live a longer and healthier life, and there are many people who live into their 80's (that i know of) who didn't follow any wacko eating plan.

I am only speaking for me, I am not at all trying to insult anyone so please, I beg, do not take offense to this. If any of this leads to a healthy change in one's life than it is totally worth it - but it has only led me in a downward spiral.

But speaking of life just previously, I want to spend it learning new things - not regurgitating and re-reading the same diet/anti-diet books that I know inside-out. I tend to do that a lot. My time is spent trying to motivate myself into it. I've made a decision and come **** or high water I am sticking to it. Next time I'm bored I'll instead pick up a geography book I have and learn something about the world, or any other of the really interesting books I have. Or finally sign up for those piano/painting/dancing/art lessons that I've always wanted to try out, and do something different, something a little scary thats outta the ordinary for me.
I am giving up my books on anything food/diet related. I am putting them away in my basement and forgetting about them (not like I havent practically memorized them!). This time it is me, myself and I and I trust whole heartedly that I have the strength to do this, because, also, I have no other choice if I want a life that I can enjoy. Basically, I'm going to move on in life as though there is no problem to fix, like it never existed. I have read enough on how to overcome the problem, but now I want to do it on my own and do it by forgetting it. If that makes sense...

When I came home and turned on my computer I struggled not to visit the other boards I frequent, but I had to write to you, my friends, and let you know that it has nothing to do with you, and I care deeply that you all do well. And for that reason, I will pop in here now and then to check up on you, or email you separately to catch up.

I should mention that I don't plan on eating myself to death or anything! Binging is not the way I want it at all, either. It is unnatural and unhealthy.
I know that by giving up dieting I will eventually lose weight because eating in and of itself does not cause weight gain, overeating and binging does though. But I am not concerned with that right now. Weight loss will come when it comes, if ever, and in the meantime I have to live with the person I am right now. But it can only get better b/c I feel amazing when I dont binge, and I only binge when I try to limit, therefore i will feel better immediately when I stop doing that. I should mention that so far today has gone totally different than a normal day. I got up started to make eggs and chicken bacon and my dad finished the cooking while I got ready for school. By the time I was ready I sat down and didn't really want it. I ate almost a whole egg and few bites of the chicken bacon, but it just had no appeal. I onlly had one hour of class so i quickly threw in my bad a nectarine and an apple. I was going to get a muffin near school, but they looked kinda stale so I passed and had the fruit. Went to the bakery when I was coming back home, got a bunch of stuff, and came home - didnt even eat right away, but when I eventually did I only had one freakin' sandwich. This is coming from a girl who eats everything when she can. But all day I refused to think about diet or food or exercise and suddenly it lost its control on me. I didnt not eat more b/c i want to "lose weight", I didnt eat more right then because I knew I can go back in one hour or whenever I am hungry again. I also got a free pound cake from the bakery which is still untouched. I know I will have a piece I'm sure, but when I really feel like it, which just isnt right now.

I understand that you guys are not at this frustration point, really a breaking point, where you need to let it go. You may never reach this point. And as long as things are working out for you and going according to plan and you don't mind doing it - all the power to you and there is no reason to change it. I am not saying this to try and influence any of you out of a diet lifestyle. I absolutely never impose my views on someone else, but you mean a lot to me and I want you to understand why I am giving up on it.

I apologize profusely for the way too lengthly post. I just want you to know that I am not leaving forever, and I will most certainly keep in touch, but for the sake of my sanity and my happiness, I am ready to move on to a phase in my life that does not revolve around or involve weight loss.

Much Love,
Cyndy

I'm sure I'm speaking for all of us when I say you'll be missed, Cyndy. I wish you all the best.


Sigh...depressing day today.

So far,
B: toast and cream cheese, grapes
L: Lean Cuisine chicken carbonara
S: 2 campino candies
D: haven't had it yet.

I signed up for ballroom dance lessons today!

ok guys, sorry I haven't posted in so long. I've been very busy.
Ok well Im doing extremely bad. Im at like 127.5-130lbs...Really sucks...Because my instructor keeps getting on my case about losing weight :(
Its really hard.....agh.....but I HAVE TO DO THIS....I have a competition in the start of December and HAVE TO be skinnier by then. I got my suits made and they hafta fit me!!!

Well anyways, my PLANS for eating are :

B: 1 bran muffin ( homemade w/ splenda and no butter or anything)
1/2 banana

L: 1/2 pita w/ sliced turkey and mustard...or tuna salad mad w/ yogurt
can of v8
1 piece of fruit
cut up veggies


I've been trying this Exchange program from Diet for Dancers...im tryign the 1000cal. diet...but its tough...i end up binging and eating peanut butter

snack: silhouette yogurt smoothie thing....only 70 cals...
piece of fruit
left oevr veggies from school

dinner: chicken or tufo and like cooked veggies or salad

snack: yogurt
or fruit
or light popcorn (3 cups)

Hello all...

Long time no talk! I just wanted to drop in to see how you all are doing. I noticed how this post hasn't been used in awhile and am hoping you are all fine and happy :)

I am feeling a whole lot better and think I can ease my way back into a little more structured eating. I needed a break though. Throughout this time I ate whenever I was hungry until full on real foods, healthy stuff - no junk or processed - and I never binged. In fact, if I probably stayed with this way eventually I would lose weight, it would take a long time. But I am contemplating tweaking it a bit now that I feel less stressed about the whole thing.

Anyways, if any of you still check the boards...just pop in and say hi I you feel like it, I'd love to hear from you and how your progress is going or whether you needed a break too! hehe

I am trying to post my stats so we'll see if it worked!

It's me again! I hope you guys see this post because it has been changed now to the support groups forum.
Today was not good because I ended up eating the candy thats supposed to be for Halloween trick or treaters.
Anyways, tomorrow morning I am getting up and working out. Strict counting of calories, aiming for 1600.
I do not want to start feeling sorry for myself, getting mad about the candy I ate today -- forward thinking, no looking back. I will lose the weight. Period.

Think positive with me here, okay?!

Hope to hear from you
Cyndy

Okay girl, this is my third post! I don't think any of you have seen the post in this new area so I'm bumping it in hopes that you'll notice so you can give me an update on how you are doing!

I am finding it surprisingly easy to healthy well without overeating.. One day this week I had the Halloween candy in my house but havent touched it since (and dont want to!)

I feel really great and so much better than I did a month ago. I am so relieved to be happy again, for some reason I was getting really depressed before.

I have also found that since focusing more on my health and body, it has given me a new "obsession", and I quote that because its not really an obsession, but has given me another focus other than to concentrate on my guy problems, and its working better than I ever thought.

Hey

So sorry I havent posted in like AGES!!!!

Well im on day four of south beach. My mom convinced me to try it because she likes it so much.

God weightloss is so frustrating. Ya on Halloween I was so proud, I gave all of my candy to my friends, except for like 5 mini chocolate bars which i polished off the next day. But then i had no more candy and haven't missed it at all.

I found it very easy to eat healthy. I try not to think about food so much. When I do think about food I start to think about how much i really want some bad food and then i cant stop thinking about it and i eat some. then i eat even more and even more.
Yea if i just dont even think about it at all, it really helps. When i am like ok today i will have NO chocolate, i keep saying that to myself and then in the evening i binge and go crazy eating chocolate. I just try to keep myself busy and I eat a lot less.

Oh you guys should try the South Beach mock french toast (on the south beach phase one breakfast recipes) its delicious@!!!!

Hey Blondie!

Congrats! I just noticed the weight loss. Wow, I would love to be 127 lbs again :)

I am doing much better because I am holding a whole new attitude. And what is making such a difference for me is saying to myself that this is such a small price to pay to be slim (for me, writing it down).

Good luck and talk to you later!

Im glad that you have found a good motivation!

It can get really hard. I am under soooo much pressure right now to lose weight from my coach. Competition is soon, and I MUST BE THIN!!!I know its not right to listen to other people, but it is helping me to push myself to do what I want. :p

Are you guys following a low fat diet or low carb, or low cal?