Don't feel guilty Gen. Life does go on and you need something to keep you sane. Keep in touch and when she really needs you there, go then. Don't ever have regrets, do whats best for you because thats what your mum would want.

Thanks Barb. I think I'm just sensitive because I've always felt like I *should* do what I am expected to do... and one of my "friends" at home said "well, I didn't want to say anything, but if that was MY mum, there's no way I'd go back to some dumb job". Nice and tactful, eh?

I eat Amy. Usually for lunch at work i go across road and get a toasted ham cheese tomato sandwich. Light on the butter and ham. If I am home i dont eat anything at lunch most days. Or if I do it will be a piece of toast. Breakfast if I have it is a weetbix with lite milk. I drink about 5 cuppas a day (which is less than i used to). I snack on food that is not to good for me. usually a choc a day. chips i can do without now..... over em thank god

Gen don't add pressure to yourself by worrying about what your friend says. When my dad was obviously dying, I went home to NSW about four times in the course of a year - and there were some people who strongly disapproved of me coming back to Perth each time.

But my dad understood that he had raised me to live my own life and explore my dreams - not to be his insurance, or carer as his journey came to an end. He had mum for that, and my brother, and his friends.

I don't mean for that to sound hard, because I loved him enormously, and even after almost 14 years there is a massive hole in my life because he isn't there. But he would have hated it if I put my own life on hold.

You NEED to have some sense of living, of being normal, of life continuing - and that's not being harsh, it's maintaining your sanity through a really terrible time in your life.

Some people really need to put brain in gear before opening mouth. Everybody is different and how you deal with things is your business. i totally agree with Ani. For me at the moment I'm focusing on getting back to work. I need that something to keep me from going crazy and for me it's going back to work, my family are taking care of them selves now and need me less so I have more time to think and sometimes thats not good.

As for weightloss this week, I'm down 300g and its TOM this week too.

That's just plain rude Gen. I hope that you're able to let that comment go, it was a really unfair thing for your friend to say.

Today work is extremely quiet so I'm taking the afternoon off. I'll go and do some grocery shopping and then I've got an appointment for a brazilian wax.

Ouch!!

And I must say, thanks to the Queenie for having a birthday so that I get to have Monday off work. Nice one :D


:twirly:

Julia, I've had one of them. I looked like a plucked chicken, and the pain!!!!

I do my own lol.

hi
just saying hi, nothing more to add that everyone else has not already said
i am eating constantly so doubt i will have lost weight this week

God Vonni, how on earth do you do that?!! Eek.

Grit my teeth and pull lol. The trick is to make sure you hold your skin really taut before you pull. and if you warm your skin and hair before hand.

Ditto what everyone else has said to about yr 'friend' Gen. Chin up and dont let them get you down. It's your life you have to lead and noone else can walk in your shoes. You need a sense of normalcy in life when other things are turmoil.

Gen you gotta look after your self the only reason i was suprised you went back was becuase you didnt tell us you were.. IM glad your getting back to normal. :) . I think its the only thing you can do in that situation.. Surely noone expects yuou to give up everything and just sit and wait ..

Barb hubby is home for good.. thank goodness.. I cant do the single parent thing anymore.. i needed my hubby home. as of yet he hasnt got work but i am confident he wont have trouble.. he is very good at what he does and well known to be a good worker. and there is always work in his field ( scaffolding).

OMG brazillian ouch.............. lol.. i tryed to do it once .. i pulled and the pain.. omg.. and half the wax was still stuck on me not a single hair had budged.. .. i ended up in the bath for ages trying to get the wax off... lol

im never trying that again.. and im not gonna get anyone else to do it for me.. shaving for me tyvm... lol


Weigh in yesterday down another 600 grams.. 107.2 :) .. im happy with that . :) anyway gotta run.. hubby wonta the computer

the most painful thing if you ask me is arm hair waxing
so i use hair removal cream for that and it works so so good, and it works for your bikini area too NO PAIN whatsoever
i used to get brazilians all the time, now i just dont care coz i have not seen down there for a long long time - big fat belly in the way

i have now medical reason (moreso) to lose weight
liver problems causing me pain and discomfort, so more tests happening and ultrasounds and stuff so we shall see

bottom line is i need a kick in the bottom and tomorrow DEFINATELY is another day
not sure if i am going to go and visit my friend tomorrow or just chuck a total sickie and stay home and go for a walk with the dogs and do work around the yard........ i just want to sleep and that is annoying coz there no reason for it....

found out today NOT pregnant, which is annoying but gives me a definately another month to lose some weight, annoying coz i am now 17 days late for my period which means breastfeeding, the pill and i reckon my weight has put my cycle all out of whack.... :( the control freak in me cant handle it and wants to be pregnant NOW (but anytime now will be perfect as i DID NOT want a february baby - although i would not have argued)

anyway everyone is doing so well losing a little here and a little there
so i am "jealous" but that is silly coz it is my own fault i keep finding everyone's lost weight

weigh in tomorrow...... hmmmmmmm

ok i lost 200 or 300 grams
better than a kick up the bum

so sad just lost a friend - these things happen - she was selfish
i dont need her
had shake for brekky and shake for lunch and drinking water
plan is to shake excess weight and then introduce lifestyle change food

Kel hope yr tests all turn out ok. How can u drink them shakes lol. I cant stand them. the flavour is ok but all i can taste afterwards is a chalky residue. I hve a biggest loser shake in my cupboard and its been sitting there a while. ut some of them are more calories than my normal brekky meal anyway.
Is Friday still on?

Woohoo for everyones little losses this week xoxox

yes friday is still on, bring the shake i will have it! hehehehe
i dont mind the taste or texture of the shakes at all, and i know sometimes it is more calories than what i could have for brekky but i also dont have will p ower so will find myself eating jem's left over brekky as well as my own or sometimes just keep eating the good thing i have chosen for brekky making it no longer a good thing... so until i get rid of this excess weight and start measuring out portion sizes i am sticking to the shakes for brekky definately!

i have liver ultrasound today at 1.30 so fasting until then and before that i have heaps of blood tests, one scaryish possibility the doc is testing for is hepatitis from my recent tattoo, so that is interesting, we are both not really worried about that though but just something else to rule out
my personal diagnosis is fatty fatty bom bah diesese
my body just can not handle how quickly i have put on weight and so is shutting down
yesterday i did awesome
walk in the morning - after massive fight with friend that could have been workout friend - you win some you lose some - then had shake for brekky andlunch and then a handful of sultanas for snack and then half a can of spaghetti shapes at 4.30pm with jemima (which reminds me must buy more) which i think was about 200ish calories so then i figure that was the same as a shake or a meal so i had my own vege concoction for dinner
i had cabbage, mushroom and zucchini microwaved in currypowder and soysauce which should be basically no calories and was kinda like a soup and i actually liked it so i have more of that for maybe lunch today or something

hoping for cross trainer this morning..... was so down yesterday about losing friend (or mainly not wanting situation to drag on so not being able to email her a list of things i wish i had said or elaborate more on things that were said) didnt get around to doing much in the afternoon.... i mopped the floor and so that is kinda like incidental exercise i guess...

everyone have a great great week

ani - how is your holiday going? you should see my garden (this is take 3 of vegepatch, take 2 was not that great didnt get much) so much is thriving due to the awesome weather we have been having the rain's real nutrients are really working! my corn plants look healthy, the lettuce is already usable, the broccoli looks happy and the strawberries are actually going to work this time!! i cant wait for the peas, snowpeas and zucchini too! the only thing missing is squash but i have to find buttonsquash as i planted normal squash last time and dont eat normal squash not that i dont like it i just like the button squash
also randomly planting pumpkin seeds around the yard so that will annoy benji when he is mowing, however as i am doing a heap more yard work it will be my problem too!!!

vonni i will facebook y ou about friday

I actually took my lunch to work today, and just booked a nice stirfry for dinner and to take tomorrow for lunch.

Also went to the information session about weight loss surgery. Think I would only have the lapband, would not do the gastric bypass - too drastic, too permanent, irreversible. Got to call the woman tomorrow.

Got some new kitty babes.. they are gradually getting used to me and the place, they were pretty wild and scared at first.

Awww having kittens will be nice Gen. Hope they are good company for you.

I had hoped to start getting back on track today but so far, not so good. I did have breakfast but people had brought in lollies and cakes and I indulged in them throughout the day. Tonight I'm going to a seminar where dinner is provided so I'll be limited to choice there.

Realistically though, I need to start doing something. I feel really fat and I haven't felt this way in ages. The shirts of my work uniform are all really tight around my tummy and they keep riding up. Not a good look!

My goal for tonight is that I cook something when I get home to bring for my lunch tomorrow. Something healthy. And bring some fruit to snack on. Goal for tomorrow is to go to the gym. Even if I just do a 20 minute walk on the treadmill, it's better than nothing and knowing me, once I've started I'll be happy to carry on longer than that.

I also need to weigh myself and accept whatever horror story the scales tell me. Last time I weighed I was up to 88kg so I fully expect to be over that now.

Ani, I hope you're having a lovely relaxing time :D


:twirly:

Hellooo ooo oo o ... echo echo echo ...

Is anybody out there?

At the seminar I went to last night, I won a flight from Auckland to Kuala Lumpur and return!! :woohoo: My plan is to get my mum to come with me as she lived there over 35 years ago and hasn't been back for about 17 years. So I've got to get my savings hat on big time! I hope to go in October.

Didn't manage to make any lunch for today when I got home last night (too excited!) so I bought lunch today: teriyaki chicken rice bowl from the Japanese place in the mall.

Tonight for the first time in weeks I'm going to the gym. I've got the OK to leave work a bit early so I can get there in time to get a spin bike and do a class.

Tonight I will cook something for tomorrow's lunch and I will prepare breakfast for tomorrow.


:twirly:

wow - too much happening
julia - auckland to kuala lumpa too cool, is chicken teriyaki healthY? that sounds good.... hmmmmm
gen - lapband surgery, i think they make you lose weight before the surgery sometimes? benji's boss just got it done but was on wesley hospital shakes diet for at least 12months before that
me - ate 2 cheerios, some cheese and a tiny bit of chocolate to ruin the diet for a split second - going to a linen party tonight so hope the host doesnt serve stuff i usually cant resist - the cold weather does not make me want to eat salad (but i did and it was awesome at lunchtime)

No idea if it's healthy or not but it was yummy and better than a lot of other things I could have eaten.

Tonight I went to the gym and did a spin class. Damn hard work and I'm so pleased with myself for doing it. I bit the bullet and weighed myself and was very pleasantly surprised that I'm sitting at 88.3kg. That's about 2 or 3 kg less than what I had feared.

I cooked an awesome dinner of Israeli couscous, chicken and veggies and I have enough leftover to have for lunch tomorrow. I've prepared tomorrow's breakfast and am about to pack my gym bag so I'll be good to go.

Over here, to get insurance to agree to pay for it, you have to do 6 months of "physician supervised diet" - the hospital actually has a lifestyle program where you go to weigh in monthly, and attend weekly classes with dieticians etc. If you gain even one pound during this diet, insurance can refuse to pay.

You can go see the doc and start getting the tests etc done after 3 months of the diet. They already know who is a good candidate, but you gotta jump thru the insurance company's hoops.

gen - is your ticker up to date? are you only 110.8? because that makes you only 6ish kg over what i am .. and i think you are the sameish height as me too, can you post a photo or message then i will give you email address etc etc

so far this week (i know i should not weigh in mid week but i am going to doctor who is going to tell me i need to lose weight - so i wanted to tell him how i was going on self motivated diet) 800grams down!!!! :carrot:

jemima is about to trash the study and i am SO not in the mood for that

Wow Kel thats so cool.... 800gm. Julia I am envious. U can go see the oompa loompas in kuala lumpa :p
I am off to the Dr today for a follow up on my thyroid. Had follow up scans done on Tuesday and the sonographer said there are changes all through my thyroid suggestive of hashimotos or Graves.... now i KNOW it couldnt be graves cause thats hyperactive thyroid and I CERTAINLY dont have that lol. But all other symptoms do point to hashimotos except for the constipation. and my nodules have grown from .9mm to 1.5mm so I think I will DEMAND a biopsy just to be on the safe side.

Will let you all know how i go.

Ani Ani how is your garden? Have u been chilling out on yr time off? Hope so. U need a break. Maybe are you doing some writing while on break? Anyhow, hope u are doing SOMETHING u enjoy big hugs.

Gen lapband scary. They had something on Today Tonight here the other day about having medicare rebate for it to counteract the growing obesity rates in Oz and also they mentioned gym membership. Probably when it comes in have to meet certain criteria though like insurance over there.

Good luck with the doctor Vonni, I hope they can start getting the issue sorted for you.

I don't know that I'm going to get to the gym today, I've got so much other stuff to do!! Going to Stomp tonight and am really looking forward to that.

I've just gone through the collection of old gym programmes from over the last couple of years and have made up a brand new one based on bits and pieces of the old ones. I will start that next week and I'm looking forward to it.


:twirly:

Nah Kel, haven't updated it, too depressing. I haven't weighed in for a while, but last time I was 255 lbs which is about 115kg. I am 167cm. Have never been this big in my life, and it's horrible, I just feel awful. I have tried on and off and been very strict with the diet at times, but it's not moving at the moment. I just can't do the exercise I used to do, with my stuffed achilles. I do want to get an elliptical machine for home - that doesn't seem to hurt too much.

getting a fine needle aspirate done. not sure when cause they only do once a mth in this backward town lol. otherwise i travel an hour to have it done.

I feel exactly the same as you Gen. Although I'm not at the heaviest I've ever been I'm really uncomfortable all of the time, and I have a heel spur which makes it difficult to do even the day to day things let alone go out and exercise. I'm up 100g this week, no big deal, will try harder next week.

woo Kel and I met up in toowoomba today and had a healthy lunch...... so proud of us heeheee.

My appointment for FNA is the 19th of June. I'm scared.... a needle in the throat, just the thought of it makes me cringe lol.

I would be scared too Vonni, but at least you'll know what going on after you have it done.

a needle in the throat?? ewww that creeps me out like the idea of eye surgery
but you got to do what you got to do (like child birth - bring on the stork)

was great to catch up on friday, i love your family they are all awesome, ebony is such a cutie

i am the fattest i have ever been and my liver is enlarged and shows evidence of fatty change - what does that mean???

It means you need to lose weight ;) It is reversible in its early states. Can be benign, or can progress to various things.

Low fat diet, exercise and weight loss. Avoid things that annoy your liver, like NSAID drugs and alcohol.

Yikes Vonni, a needle in the throat does sound scary! But you'll handle it and hopefully they'll be able to give you a diagnosis which will be great.

Kel have you got a plan? My weight has been going steadily upwards and my plan is to go back to the one thing I used to do which I know worked for me. Can you do the same?

Today for the first time in MONTHS, I'm back to writing down everything that I eat. I dropped the 1 teaspoon of sugar that I've been having in my morning cup of tea. Had a healthy breakfast and have brought some fruit to snack on.

I can't go to the gym tonight as I've got a work function so today I'm going to aim to have a "perfect" day diet-wise.

I'm going to start counting points again because that's the one thing that I've found has really worked for me.

ANI! Where are you my dear? Having a lovely restful time I hope :D


:twirly:

:carrot: guess what????
1.8kg DOWN
wooo hoooooooooooo
it is amazing what a plan and a bit of will power can do!
and that is while eating FOOD

shake for brekky most days, low fat lunch and no carbs after 4pm
snacks - rice cakes, celery, carrot, rice cakes, rice cakes
ONE diet softdrink a day if i have to (and i have run out at home so that makes it easier)
water and diet cordial
3 dog walks this week, 1.5 cross trainer sessions, 2 wii fit sessions

i can do it

gen that is exactly what my brother (basically a doctor) said too, really explained it well and mentioned that i could ruin my liver the way an alcoholic does and that is not fun and my game plan is to lose weight and see what happens, i have had a fatty liver about 8 years ago and it fixed it self so i am going to do it again
and fit into my sexy red pants

i am so glad i lost weight this week, i thought i blew it with the banana custard a couple of nights ago!

julia - i wish i had the disapline to write down everything i eat.... would make it easier when trying to figure out where i go wrong some days/weeks

Home truth #1: I SUCK at maintenance!

Ever since I decided to start maintenance I have spent the last several weeks eating everything that wasn't nailed down. I reckon I have gained 4kg! In fact, let's not kid anyone - I weighed in today at 73.5kg.

Home truth #2: If I don't stop NOW I am going to put all the weight back on.

I don't seem to have learned a great deal from all my hard work. I have been eating everything: fish and chips, potato chips, chocolate, lollies - you name it, I've gutsed it in the last month or two.

Home truth #3: Not only is it hard to lose weight when this close to goal - it's bloody hard to maintain it. But I'm making excuses - I haven't even really tried.

Home truth #4: It is NOT my imagination that my Size 14 clothes are feeling tight - they didn't shrink in the clothes dryer!!!

SO…

From today I am back on the wagon and I am not going to stop until I have reached my goal. Today's goals are:

• Eat no more than 1650 calories;
• Drink 2L of water (that'll be a miracle); and
• Get close to 10,000 steps on my pedometer (even if I'm on holidays).

My apologies for not replying to any of your posts. I have read them all, and been popping in every day to see what you're all up to - usually while eating something disgusting - but I felt the need to confess, and to try and be honest about what's going on with me…

Congrats Kel on such a fantastic loss! That's awesome :broc:

And Ani, I'm so pleased to see you back. Ok, so maybe you're not ready for maintenence just yet but it was probably an important lesson for you to learn.

Unfortunately for people like us who have / have had a weight problem, chances are that we will NEVER be able to let our guards down because that's when we go back to old, unhealthy habits. It's a challenge and will be a challenge for life.

With support, we can all do it.


:twirly:

you know what makes it hit home for me??
SKINNY people at the gym
obviously you have to work at it FOREVER

ani - i am so glad to see you back and can not believe you have put on 4kgs, but holidays will do that to you.... i did exactly the same last month while in melbourne/sydney
you do not suck at maintenance, coz honestly to be eating that kind of food you were not REALLY trying to maintain??? honestly???
seems like you were just over it and needed a break and went wild......
BUT you have stopped yourself in time
and you have such an awesome plan
you GOT to get back under 70, i cant remember what you set your upper limit buffer to?

julia - thanks for the broccoli dude, i am so so positive at the moment, not overdoing anything and only committing myself to things i KNOW i can stick to... i am not sitting here saying i am going to go for a walk every day or that i am going to have 3 shakes a day or anything like that, and i think with this mind frame i can do it
as long as a lose SOMETHING every week the motivation should stay and i will get out of the 100s SOON
did i show you a photo of the tattoo i got in february?

Kel it's so great to see you sounding so motivated and in control. You go girl!! No, I didn't see your new tattoo ... show show!!

I had a really good day yesterday. Ate sensibly and wrote it all down in my food diary. Went to the movies to see Angels and Demons which was really good. Luckily I guess, I'm broke so couldn't afford to buy popcorn or anything so I took a muesli bar and a bottle of water from home :D

Today's goals are to eat well, write all my food down and to do weights and cardio at the gym tonight. It's day 1 of my brand new self invented programme and I'm excited to start.

I have exactly $3 to last me until payday which is Thursday and the only thing I have in the fridge is a bit of mince, a single carrot and some cabbage so it looks like it'll be mince stir fry for me for the next couple of days.


:twirly:

wrap the mince up in the cabbage and san chou bow style one night and mix it up and put it on toast ky sy ming style another night YUM
do you have curry powder or soy sauce?? they make it yummier too

ok will try and upload new tattoo

Ooooh pretty. I love the rainbow!