I have just six more weigh-ins to go until my 2nd anniversary of starting my weight loss, and I have set myself a challenge of trying to reach 75kg by then. It's abundantly clear that I am really slow at this, but at the same time I wouldn't change it for anything.
Over the last (almost) two years I have learned a lot, and changed several things about my life. Committing to a weight-loss journey has been really similar to a new relationship - and in many ways it runs parallel to that.
I've been through the honeymoon period where it all feels new and exciting, and where I felt almost obsessed with it. Then gone through a lot of "I'm not sure this is what I want", and sometimes been quite happy to coast along. At other times I have felt confident enough to plan for the future, and there have been times when I've been thoroughly bored
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Over the last three months I have been taking it for granted, and even "taking it out on my food" when I've been p!ssed off with the world.
But since anniversaries are a good time for reflection, I have to say that overall it has been a good relationship so far. What has worked for me, and what hasn't?
• Eating breakfast is the biggest, most important change I made to my relationship with food. Not only is it physically important, but it sets my momentum for the whole day - starts every day by reminding me that this is the "new me", and often gives me the inspiration to have a good day with food.
• I rarely eat takeaway food any more. And when I do I don't enjoy it the way I used to.
• It's really true what they say about how 'failing to plan is planning to fail'. When I plan my meals I am fine; I have kept an Excel spreadsheet of my weekly weigh-ins since Day One, and it tells an interesting story. It also helps to keep me motivated because I don't want to see that graph going in the wrong direction. I also count calories (although I haven't been so good with that over the last month), and it keeps me right on track.
• I have learned to identify my "danger times". I now understand my emotional relationship with food, and how I use it to protect myself, hide, comfort, punish… and I have come up with other ways of looking after myself.
• I now appreciate the value of exercise. I believe that it is over-rated as a way of losing weight, because it only contributes around 20% of the calories we burn. But it is so important for better health, stronger bodies, muscle tone, stamina and motivation. More important than structured exercise is being able to get to a point where I am physically active throughout the day.
• I have also learned that the biggest rewards have nothing to do with external promises. What I mean by that is when we say "when I lose 5kg I'm going to get a massage/buy clothes etc"… For me the biggest rewards are that I now fit into chairs without bruising my thighs, I wear a Size 14-16 in clothes, I am not obese anymore, people don't look at me and silently judge me, I don't feel ashamed of myself - and many other benefits.
• The hardest thing I have learned is that the smaller I get the less invisible I become. And because I'm not hiding my emotions with food, I am a lot more emotional than I used to be - and I'm also a lot more real.
• I can do things now that I never dreamed would be possible. Who would have thought, when I was 105kg, that I could work for eight hours a day in a physically demanding job, then come home and do gardening for two hours? Who would have thought I could do it and get real satisfaction from it?
More importantly who would have ever thought I would get to a point where I would demand something different for myself! When I threw in my business earlier this year, then went to work at Bunnings, who would have predicted I would be signing a contract for my SECOND book by mid-year?
When my second anniversary comes around I want to be able to tell you all that I have lost 30kg/66 pounds/28.5% of my body weight.
The other day at work I carried a 25kg bag of potting mix out to a car for a woman. It was no more than a 50 metre walk, but I was hurting by the time I got there. It occurred to me that I used to carry that amount - and more - on my body every single day, and it made me really sad. I was actually overwhelmed by thinking: "What the **** did I do to myself?". And it was such a relief to let it go…
. i had my Mother in law tell me yesterday i have lost heaps of weight and look good.. .. she said "hello skinny how are you.. youve lost heaps of weight .. .. Steven has even said to her how much weight i had lost ".. lol . we went to he candy store she has just moved shops and reopened the new one.. and its bigger and better then ever .
PerthChick , 06-18-2008 04:30 PM
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please start looking after yourself your are an amazing person and you deserve to be looked after too .. i know your busy with jem and the house but.. please.. take time for you too.. get good healthy food some exercise.. even a walk everyday is better then nothing .. and DONT BUY THE CRAP FOOD... 
brrrrrrr its so cold... lol
