Today I saw a girl from school that I had not seen since May of last year. She is a couple of years ahead of me in my program, so we don't really talk.
But she walked by, and she was just so... small. I was SO jealous. I had been feeling so good about my weight loss over this summer. But looking at her, just made me feel like I must have done a whole lot of slacking over the summer. I didn't feel happy for her. I just felt bad for me.
Yikes... I sort of feel like an awful person now. But as the day has gone on, I have been trying to make it a more positive thing, trying to think of what she has done as inspiration, and a little kick in the backside to keep moving.
Sorry for ranting... I guess I was just on the other side of this "jealous observer" discussion today.
I think that's understandable. It's one thing to feel that way privately; it's quite another to make the person feel bad by refusing to acknowledge their hard work. It doesn't sound like you would've done that, had you two stopped and chatted, so I don't think you should feel bad. And as you said, try to make it an inspiration! You're obviously doing well for yourself, losing 26 pounds. Congratulations!
I know how you feel, and in your situation, I take it to the gym with me, I would be thinking about her when working out.. thats another reason I take *fitness* mag to the gym Im like.. hmmm. I want to get as close to "that" as possible. Thats just me and my motivation though
I know what you mean....you get yourself all pepped up when you're in a lower size, etc, and then you see someone even smaller than you and suddenly you're a giant whale in comparison. Just roll it off your back and keep doing what you're doing. There will always be someone who happens to be smaller than us. Just look at Hollywood. Whether or not it's healthy is another story.
Ah, I know that feeling too. But as long as we don't end up sabotaging other's efforts because of it, I think we haven't earned our pass for **** yet.
I wonder if it's not, all that simply, a jealousy born from insecurity, sort of? We're so often singled out for our weight, our silhouettes that aren't conform to the norm, etc, so knowing another or other person/people who also struggle with their weight is a sort of reassurance that we are not alone, and... when they lose the weight faster than us, or end up smaller, well, we all of a sudden feel alone again. Maybe there's part of this in that feeling. I don't know though, it's just a thought.
I think one of the most important things for my weight loss efforts was when I finally gave up the habit of comparing myself to other people. I would look at really fat women and think "Hey, I'm no where as big as she is, I'm not that bad!" I would look at thin women and think "Well, she just drew a winning hand in the genetic card game, I bet she never had to worry about gaining a pound in her life!"
I think it's understandable. I think it's just plain human nature. And I think that it is self defeating to meeting the goals of weight loss. To do that, one ultimately has to be selfish, to think only of one's own body and not focus on others. It's fine to hang around like minded people and share advice and support, of course. But when it comes down to the brass tacks, in order to be successful, we must be accountable to ourselves.
I don't really find myself jealous of others' skinny bods; but I do find myself hating on me more every time I pass a mirror & see how chubby I REALLY AM.
Part of it is because I compare ME NOW to ME BACK THEN. Whereas ME NOW is in the 40-yr range and 160+ pounds, and ME BACK THEN was in the 20-yr range & below 120 pounds.
That's just stupid. Why should I compare ME-NOW to ME-THEN? I'm basically the same person, yes, but A LOT MORE THAN JUST MY WEIGHT has changed about me in 20 some odd years!!
We can only be the best person that we can be. There will always be someone who can pump iron harder, someone who is taller, shorter, prettier and smartier but in all of creation their is only one me. The same is true for you celebrate you and enjoy the skin that you are in. Just because the sun is not the moon does not mean they are not both need. Everyone one has their own beauty celebrate your today and the next time you see that girl think gosh she is awesome in her way and I am awesome in mine. Life is short live well love always