My name is Tiffany. I am 33 years old with 4 children 12 and under. I am a military wife and stay at home schooling mom. I am sure I have gobs of time to get in exercise and me time but my poor time management skills and guilt that I'm not "being a good mom" because I even want something other than to sit with my kids 24/7 keep me from persuing more.
Now, over a period of 12 years of marriage, I have gained an excess of 130 lbs. I am carrying a whole other person around with me, her name is Weight. I keep trying to lose her but she keeps finding me. It must be the all those cookie crumbs that give me away.
I am having a tough time losing weight because my motivation is so low that I'm in a negative yield. I feel that if my husband still loves me when even though I'm fat, and still wants to have sex with me, why bother. The problem is, I HATE me. I hate having to tuck my skin skirt into my pants when I put them on. I hate not being able to get on the floor with my 1 year old and chase him around on my hands and knees screaming "RAAAWW". I hate that I show bitterness and long to look like someone else.
So, here I am, whiney and complaining. I need help with it all. A healthy, TASTEY menu--I love the taste of food-- that everyone can share. I need uplifting support but someone who knows how I feel and doesn't think that beating me over the head with "common sense" will help THEM feel better. I need someone to remind me that I'm doing this becuse I think I'm valuable, even if no one else does.
WHAT CAN I OFFER MY TEAM MATE:
Dispite the above feel of aggression, I am gentle on others. I can and will pray for you, even if you don't ask for it. I believe that God will ultimately give me the strenght to get it right and stay that way. I like to look everything there is to know, up on the internet. I can help you find it. I can share with you the knowledge and wisdom that others have given and are giving to me, that aren't a part of this group.
Mostly, I can be a person to hear you when you need to vent. just type NTV in the beginning of your message and I won't give you any sage advice on how to get yourself right. I care about you, YES even though I have never met you. I care that you hurt and that you need a friend, I care that you are lonely and want to talk.
Give me a try. Kind of like a shoe, if I don't fit, move on to the next one.
I'm brand-spanking new here, but I feel so much of the frustration that you do right now. I've never had a problem whipping myself into shape, but now that I find myself 40 lbs. overweight and almost 40, it seems the harder I try, the less weight I lose, and in fact, GAIN weight. I walked 8 miles in two days, ate meticulously, and my weight went UP. I was so angry yesterday I ate any darn thing I wanted to eat.
So now today, here I am. Mad, ashamed, and defeated. Again.
So yeah, I could use a buddy, too.
p.s. I also home school my kids, and my hubby is in the military.
Hi there ladies. I am definitely not trying to hijack your thread, but I read you guys information and thought that you guys would be great for a new check-in I just created. Please check it out. It's here at 3FC. Since you are both trying to lose right now as I am, I would love to get to know you better. If nothing else, please stop by. Here is the link. http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=92775
I am feeling much better right now so thought I would come back on and say hello.
MissH, I do know how you feel about gaining weight when you exercise and eat right. I actually read that when you want to lose weight, NOT to change your diet right away, but to begin exercising first. Get your body used to the exercise and then, after about 2 weeks, begin to GRADUALLY cut down on callories. I found the site by typing exercises for the obese in the google search.
I am going to pop on over to U2girl's link and check it out. I don't mind the hi jackingI just wanted to get some help.
MissH, since you are military and home school I will PM you my e-dress and maybe we can chat a bit that way.
I know where you're coming from about the motivation thing. I felt like you do up until about 2 months ago. Since then, I have managed to find the motivation, and I would love to help you do so in any way I can.
I like what you wrote in your post. You are valuable, and I hope you realize that the best reason to lose weight is because you love yourself, not because you hate yourself.
Anyway, if you would like another weightloss buddy, feel free to PM me and we can exchange email addies.
Hi there!! I was directed to you from a fellow Arkie buddy of mine that thinks we'd have alot in common! She may have told you the same, but I wanted to tell you a bit about me.
I am 29 and 241 pounds. I am a wife and mother working at the Children's Hospital. I am also working on myself and apparently I have been needing the update. I am coming off of a 3 month depression from last spring and hoping to recreate myself by the next one! I have felt alot of the feelings that you have felt (especially the thing about your hubby!!) and I think that we would get along famously! PM me to buddy up!!!
Welcome JJPhat: We are all so glad to hear from you! We have super great ladies out there. Like Elycia, we'd love to see you at Jaded Ladies. The Winning Losers are an excellent site, but you are at a 3fc buffet. Why not have more than one course?! This is one of the few places that seconds are not only alright but encouraged. Take one serving of Winning Losers, A large dollup of Jaded Ladies, maybe a slice of Chicks up for a Challenge and you can have 100 lb Club for dessert!
If you want a buddy, I volunteer! I'm an old fart with a terrific sense of humor. I'm also endowed with compassion and modesty! Okay I was at the end of the line on that one! LOL
Norma aka harkeyvalley
WOW! I am humbled by the response to my rather surley sounding post. My edges feel so rough to me. Of course I have a friend that thinks I'm just so sweet..lol We are our own worst critics huh? Thank you all for your response to my plea for help. I know that you are needing some support too so I won't shirk you.. I will do the best I can to be on here a couple of times a day so I can keep up. Thank you all so very much!
I tried to PM you but it says that you either can't recieve them or don't want them sent to you. If you PM me maybe I can reply.
Thanks!!
JJ aka Tiffany
You can jump in with us in the military spouse thread too, if you like. It's in the 'support groups' section, down in the main thread lists below the top ones. It's called Military Spouses #2.
New: Need a crew
