Depressed over A break up & trying to stay on my diet...
I left A really abusive marrige 6 yrs ago & I decided to start dating again last yr, I met the most wonderful man but it was so hard for me to trust again...we broke up over the weekend & I looked @ A personals email that showed my matches & there was his profile 2 of them actually...today is my daughters 14th bday, my 10 yr olds bday just past & I had there party over the weekend.= me being broke & lotsa cake n ice cream lol I have been eating A little more than I should & after seeing his profiles I am devistated we were really just on A so called break or so I thought. It was so hard to open up & give myself to someone & I really thought he was the one. anyhow sorry to ramble on I just needed to vent I dont have any family or friends really because I just made alot of changes in my life I am doing A whole life makeover & I just needed to let A little of this out thanks!
I am so sorry to hear about your situation. I just went through a breakup myself (he left me for another woman), so I can imagine what you're going through.
You are on the right track trying to turn it into something positive. I know all the platitudes like "better to find out now than later" really don't provide much comfort right now, but it IS true.
Just be sure you don't compound how bad you feel by treating yourself badly. Make sure you are eating healthy, exercising, and turning into the best person you can be. After all, the best revenge is living well.
There are a lot of people on these forums who can provide support when you get lonely or depressed, even if you don't have too many real-world friends.
Feel free to PM me if you need someone to talk to.
I went through something similar last winter. I found it difficult to maintain healthy habits in the midst of it all, but I came through it. You will, too!
When everything else stinks in your life, at least you can say, "but hey - I'm 17 pounds thinner!" You don't have control over him or how he feels, so focus on what you *do* have control over - your lifestyle, your weight, your habits. Soon you will heal, and try to keep things in tab so when you do get out of the just-broke-up phase, you will have maintained your 17-pound weight loss and maybe have lost some more.
thanks for the support ...it is more than just a bad weekend it is the loss of someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with over my own insecurities but it's life...I wish I was one of the people who stop eating when they r depressed!!!
My heart goes out to you Mizz. I know it must be terribly hard at the moment to stick to healthy eating and exercise when you are on an emotional rollercoaster. Don't stress over the healthy lifestyle too much for a little while. Looking at your weight loss so far, you have obviously learnt a lot and most of your decisions will be good ones anyway, as you will just subconsciously decide to do the right thing... most of the time. If you fall off the wagon a little, it shouldn't do too much damage, and you really want to focus on getting yourself mentally strong again, so forgive yourelf any transgressions.
I think the previous poster meant that a 'bad weekend' of you eating cake, icecream etc. won't ruin your new lifestyle. I don't think she was saying that you have only had a bad weekend as far as the relationship breakup goes.
I hope that the pain will ease soon and you will be able to smile more again.
I was/am a real true example of binging on food esp sweets when depressed or stressed. I was reading some self help books and one thing that really catched my attention was "stop feeling sorry for yourself!" It helped a lot and I havent opened the refrigerator when I am stressed after reading that. Atleast not yet!
thank you ZedAus & ever& one for there comments, willmakeit ...thanks ...um I was just looking for some support to make it thru this I am not normally A binge eater & I don't feel sorry for myself I was just sharing my thoughts & using this forum to vent & find A new way to look @ things & deal with things & was looking for advice but thank you all of you for your support & advice!!! it helps alot I am feeling better!
Mizz - I'm thinking that the last post could have been for me, just missing the 'Z'. If so... My best advice for anyone wanting to lose weight/change their lifestyle is to "eat better and move more". It sounds really simple, but it is basically all I did. Notice that I didn't say eat 'less'. I actually think that I eat MORE now, but it is all as 'clean' as I can make it. I eat very little processed food and most of what I eat is whole grain, fruit and veg. I don't count calories or weigh food, unless it is to divide up larger packages into fairly even serves. I read nutrition tables on packaged food (the little that I do buy) and check for salt first, then saturated fat. I know that my body doesn't like salt, so I avoid it wherever possible.
By "move more" I simply mean to add as much extra movement to your day as you can. If this means that you are able to do 30 mins or more of cardio or strength work then that is great, but if you only have time to fit in short bursts of activity such as a few squats, or adding some stairs, or walking a little further from the car, then that is great too. I first started with 'baby steps', literally, in front of the TV. I just marched in place, then started to add a little more aerobics movements.
Oh... probably the best advice I could give, from personal experience, is to make small changes as you go along. By doing this, I hardly realised the many changes that I had gradually made to my lifestyle over the two years of losing weight. The first thing I changed was to not bring any junk food into the house. I didn't ban junk food altogether, just didn't have it around the house to tempt me. After a while, I stopped getting junk food while we were out as well, as I was just so used to not relying on having it all the time. I now take my own snacks with me and am not even tempted to buy anything. I slowly added changes such as not cooking with oil (use a non-stick pan) and making my own healthier versions of foods that I would normally buy. I now walk to and from work (10 mins each way) and I couldn't imagine NOT doing that, whereas it was just habit that I would hop in the car and drive before. I truly couldn't count the changes I have made over the years, as they didn't all happen at once, so I never felt overly 'deprived'.
If you want to know more about what I did, there is a link to a PDF document on the left hand side of my pics page called "Weight Loss Document" that talks more about my journey and what I am eating etc.
If the last post WASN'T for me, then you have just received a LOT more information than you probably ever wanted or needed. LOL
Depressed over A break up & trying to stay on my diet...
