My name is Meghan and I am here to spill my guts . I'm 21 years-old and have been struggling with my weight for the last…well…21 years. I have always been the fat kid and needless to say I am sick of it. Yeah, it was all right when I was six and the chubby little cheeks were so adorable. Now, however, it isn’t so adorable – especially when I can’t fit into a pair of jeans that fit only a few months ago or when it takes me an hour to find a shirt that conceals my stomach. Not adorable in the least. I went from 165 to 190 in the past year. Like many, I see food as a comfort. I eat when I'm hungry, not hungry, bored, angry or happy. There is no break. I just hope that by posting my struggles and goals I can get a handle on this, stick to a diet/ exercise routine, and be rid of this blasted weight. Que the epic music! I plan on starting a diet and exercise routine after the 4th of July is over. I was once 155 and I hope to get there and then lower. Wish me luck!
Location: i live in the midwest. small town minnesota
Posts: 30
Height: 5'2"
Hi, my name is April. I found this site a few years ago. I was doing pretty well back then. I noticed I had a high weight of 201, and my current weight was 184. My weight now is 197!! I am so disgusted in my self. But I can't seem to stop. I just ate a burrito then nuked myself some cheesy popcorn right afterwards and ate about half of it!! I hate how I look. I hate the fat that hangs over all my jeans that I squeeze into. I hate the baggy clothes I have to wear. I seem to just eat no matter what I feel. I don't recall the last time I heard my stomach actually growl from hunger because it always has something in it. I take walks and go the the park with the kids, but a snack is always taken with us. I started weight watchers at my old job last year and went down to 191, but am now back up to 197. I think i may be heading back into a depressed state again. I battled depression a few years ago, but was doing better recently. I just can't stay away from food. I still have all the weight watchers books. But I can't stick with it. I am so tired everyday that I cant seem to find the energy to exercise. I need a buddy to help with everyday issues or knows what I am dealing with.
Darb, of course I'll buddy up. I need as much support as I can get and I'm more then willing to give it.
April, its like reading my own life story. I was doing pretty well a few years ago too. I was steady at 160 - 165 for a few years then BAM I met my boyfriend. We began eating out almost every other day, snacking while watching movies, etc. I ended up gaining 30lbs in the last year. Sucks, cause now my boyfriend is thinner than me (and has better hair!).
My highest recently has been 192 (I haven't been that large since freshman year of HS) and just like you I can't help but be disgusted with myself. I look in the mirror and want to cry. I know I'm getting fatter but I can't stop. I know I'm not hungry and yet I make that sandwich and eat that bag of chips. Then go back and have another sandwich.
My days pretty much revolve around food. I don't know that last time I woke up hungry, cause I usually eat all the way up until bed time. I'm starting to develop the infamous "muffin top", the fat that hangs over the pants too. At least in the winter I could hide it with a hoody but now that its summer I can't really layer the clothing without looking like an idiot. Oh, and now that it is summer, I'm limited to only a few outfits cause nothing else fits. I stand at my closet and get so fustrated. This weekend I have a 4th of July party to attend and I don' t have anything to wear. It will be with a bunch of people I don't know which makes it all the better. I would love to go swimming while I'm there but I dread the idea of getting in a bathing suit. It really hurts to know that I allow my weight to stop me from doing the things I really want to do.
I dieted recently, got down to 183 from 192 in 6 days, but then it went back up a few pounds and I gave up. Like you, I have diet books out the butt but they are no good if I can't stick with it.
I know I have to make a change. I can't go on like this. I don't want to be in my 40's, look back and think "God, why didn't I just lose it back then?" I keep saying: my present self may hate the effort but my future self will be able to enjoy the result.
Wow, talk about here to spill my guts I just looked at the time. I need to go beddy byes.
hey girls...
Wow.. there is no where i've ever been or no one i've ever talked to that has mirrored what i feel every day like these last couple of posts you both wrote.
My name is Bonnie and for as long as I can remember I have been obsessed with food and it has absolutely controlled my life. I am 22.. I've always been overweight.. and I hold myself back from sooo many things because of it. I never took ukrainian dancing because i was too self concious. I have never been hiking.. I mean really hiking. I want to go scuba diving, skydiving... parasailing .. all that stuff but i don't because of my weight. For a long time i was into horses but then we actually GOT horses at my house and i didn't want to ride them. WHY? because i felt too fat on top of a horse and i didn't like bouncing around and having ppl watch me. I told my parents that i just wasn't into it anymore. The truth is: I'd die to be a PART of life instead of sitting on the sidelines watching. My highest weight was 248lbs. I am now 237lbs and I started on june 1st so today is day 29. I have made a few changes in my life. I have cut out fast food entirely. I am drinking 2litres of water a day. I am cooking my food and preparing meals... i am eating healthy. I bought a bike and now am biking to work. I am taking the stairs up my 7 flights instead of the elevator. This is the first time in my life i've made it this long on a "diet" (i choose to call it change of lifestyle) and im sooo proud of myself. Im so glad also that i found this site... YOu ladies are awesome and i've found so much support!
It's comforting in a way to know there are others out there with the same problems and struggles.
Ukrainian dancing? That sounds cool. I'm going to have to do some research, see what it's all about. Man, the last time I danced... I was seven and I was a kitty kat in Sleeping Beauty. Granted we didn't really dance. We just stood in a line, holding a pose. I'd love to dance again in some way though.
I feel you on the hiking. The closest I've come to it is the "nature trails" at the local park. A friend of mine went to Sky Line Drive (I believe that is the name) in Virginia a few years back. I was so jealous. They went through the woods, through streams, up the mountain. It was so pretty. The only thing that made me happy was the fact she really didn't enjoy it cause she was so winded and sore I'm evil, I know.
I'd love to go snorkeling again but I really don't want my butt being mistaken for a buoy as I float a long. Good luck with the skydiving and parasailing. The minute they got me in the air I'd die of fright.
Congrats on your weight loss. 29 days is amazing. Longer then I've ever done. Definately keep it up. And you're right, it is a lifestyle change not just a diet.
Keep in touch. It is always good to here from others.
New to the Site
. I'm 21 years-old and have been struggling with my weight for the last…well…21 years. I have always been the fat kid and needless to say I am sick of it. Yeah, it was all right when I was six and the chubby little cheeks were so adorable. Now, however, it isn’t so adorable – especially when I can’t fit into a pair of jeans that fit only a few months ago or when it takes me an hour to find a shirt that conceals my stomach. Not adorable in the least. I went from 165 to 190 in the past year. Like many, I see food as a comfort. I eat when I'm hungry, not hungry, bored, angry or happy. There is no break. I just hope that by posting my struggles and goals I can get a handle on this, stick to a diet/ exercise routine, and be rid of this blasted weight. Que the epic music! I plan on starting a diet and exercise routine after the 4th of July is over. I was once 155 and I hope to get there and then lower. Wish me luck!
I'm evil, I know. 