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Old 05-24-2006, 01:45 AM   #1  
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Talking Will Somebody please help me?

So i don't waist your time let me start off first by saying that i am only 17 years old. I really need a buddy to help me! I have no friends and my family doesn't care! I have overweight ever since i was a young child, and now i am at an all time high of 190 pounds! I have never been thin, but i remember a time when i was thinner. My long term goal weight is 125 pounds. I need help before i just give up all together! My weight has assisted im me having depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, lack of motivation, no will, and type 1 diabetes! I have no money so i cant afford to buy weightloss products, machines, videos or anything else, all i can do is exercise to music from Micheal Bolton, Don Henley, The Eagles, Heart, Foreigner, Journey, BTO, Pat Benitar, Hootie and the Blowfish, ect. (My favorites!!!) It is hard to do anything, like even get out of bed in the morning, espicialy now because i am out of school, i don't have a job, any friends, and there are NO guys who like me. I am so lost. I don't want to give up! If you are interested in being a buddy, or you need one, then please let me know! Hugs to all!
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Old 05-24-2006, 09:41 AM   #2  
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Welcome aboard Tweetyandme!! You are never a waste of time. When you don't feel good about yourself its hard to get motivated. That's why its great to have friends like us. We have all been there regardless of our ages.

You are welcomed to join us in the "support group" section under "sticking with it." Just begin today. Make a goal for yourself. Make it achieveable. Be realistic. You have chosen great music to dance to. All of them are my favorites too. I think I will pull my music out and dance to it. At least that's exercise I can enjoy!!

You can do this. Start today. As I said above. Make a goal for yourself. Make it achieveable. Be realistic. Choose a "diet" whether you choose to call it that or not but something that will suit your life style. Then take one day at a time.

We are here for you

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Old 05-27-2006, 06:29 AM   #3  
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Well thank you for posting, i guess no one else wants to be my buddy. Thats ok, i guess, thats nothing new.
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Old 05-27-2006, 06:52 AM   #4  
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Give it a minute Turbo! Its very early. I was heavy in High school. 5' 7" and about 180lbs, size 14 nearly the entire time. I'm 34 now and have a teenager and find that high school is unfair in its "social opinion" of heavier girls. For some insane reason being unreasonably thin is the be all end all. I didn't date (I was asked but only by the boys that thought I'd be an easy lay) My point is as an adult, in the exact same body, I found MEN really where attracted to me. I got over the insecurity of my "size" and gained an undenialble confidence. You will too. Unless your 4'11" you don't have a huge problem. It just feels like it right now. ((((hugs)))
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Old 05-27-2006, 08:12 AM   #5  
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I agree~find a support group here in the support section~I know there's other teens here too.Sometimes people don't post to you~it can be frustrating,but hang in there & jump in other discussions as well~eventually someone will answer you.
Good luck!
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Old 05-27-2006, 08:16 AM   #6  
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Give me chance Tweetyandme I have to share the computer and wait to get online.
No matter how old we are we have all been there one way or another.

One day at a time is good advice thats what I am doing taking it one day at a time.
Lack of money! yup thats me as well. Going to diet groups is not me and far too expensive.
I am going for the Gi diet its healthy and not costly either unlike others I could mention.

Now making a start is always the hard part. If you can get a plate that is smaller than the one you use at the moment. Why? well when you have a plate full you help to trick the brain into thinking you have more than is really there.
So a smaller plate helps with portions as well.

Make a goal that is realistic like the goal of drinking more water and doing some exercise. Make it simple even getting up early and making a healthy breakfast for yourself.

I know what it is like to have to do things on your own its hard but you can do it. Keep a list say on your mirror as to why you want to lose weight. No not the negative things the positive.
Buying a top in a smaller size.
Going to the swimming pool and feeling great.
Don't put yourself down you are doing what you want to do and for all the right reasons.
We are all here for you and yes I am old at the age of 52 I feel ancient compared to you. I know how hard it is to be overweight I was 140 pounds at 18.
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Old 05-27-2006, 09:12 AM   #7  
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Hey girl!

First welcome and congrats on making such a big step! I am sorry to hear that you are having a hard time with the people at your school. High school can be a really mean place to be, especially when one is overweight.
But you came to the right place!!!! everyone here is super nice! I agree with the adivce given, find a support group on here.
there is also a "20 somethings" group you may want to check out, since you are almost there

Hang in there and please don't give up!!!
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Old 05-30-2006, 02:09 AM   #8  
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Thanks for all of the encouragement and support! It sure helps when i need it!
~tweetyandme (Krissie)
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Old 05-30-2006, 10:25 AM   #9  
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Krissie,

Whew! I can remember being overweight in junior high and high school. Kids were vicious back then too. I guess some things never change. I got called all kinds of names -- the Goodyear Blimp is the one that sticks out the most. Funny thing was, the kid calling me that was larger than I was! I never did understand that one!

I have to agree with Stevi -- the older you get, the less your weight size matters. Those tiny cheerleaders in high school do get out into the "real" world and see that they aren't "all that" and they eventually gain weight and realize that people could care less about who they were in high school. And besides, do you really want a person who only bases friendship on what size you are?! A friend is a friend no matter how big or small you are and if they do care that much, then you don't need that type friendship.

There are all types of things you can do that doesn't cost a lot of money to help you. Walking is free! Cutting back on your portion size is a big start. Cooking your food differently -- baking/grilling instead of frying. Small things make a big difference!

Hang in there!
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Old 05-30-2006, 10:33 AM   #10  
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Krissie,
I know how you feel all too well. I was overweight basically all my life. I've gotten called every name in the book. I didn't have my first boyfriend until after I graduated high school....and he and I are getting ready to celebrate our 2 year wedding anniversary in less than 2 weeks. Potato gave you an invitation to join us at the support group Sticking With It...feel free to do so. There are some really wonderful women there (and everywhere else on this site). I've been hanging with Potato and the rest of the Sticking With It crew for a week now, and frankly they motivate me to keep going when I wanna just give up and quit. We'd love to have you in there. Everyone has given some very sound advice, and there's really not much more that I can add. Hope we'll hear from you soon.
Hpnotq aka Beth
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Old 06-04-2006, 11:47 AM   #11  
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Krissie,

Don't let public opinion hold you hostage! Especially unsolicited public opinion. I remember those days...oh my gosh do I remember. Even though I was not what people technically called a fat girl, I always struggled with my weight and within my family was called fat. So I had a severe complex and was always having these battles within my head. Why do I like to eat, why can't I eat just one potato chip or a carrot stick like my sized 2 mom? Baby, it just wasn't me, I liked food...and because of the lack of support-even with the small steps-I didn't have the desire to really step it up a notch. Because she didin't have the struggle I had, she could not relate. She always said you just need to push away from the table....Why do people say that? Unless you are devouring a 15 piece fried chicken dinner by yourself at one sitting, this suggestion is of no help. Because they have no clue of what you are experiencing, it is easy to just say anything... So the cure for them is to give you that penny's worth of nonsense. Noone told me then that loving me was the key!!!!
After many moons and a few hundred pounds later, I have a 21 yr old daughter who experienced much of the same in terms of body composition as I did so I knew how to handle it with her. But something mothers know is 1) teen pressure can be brutal, and if you aren't careful your child can be the victim of verbal assasination. So you must provide constant encouragement, love, hugs, kisses and much prayer to counteract this demonic spirit. 2) We all have a natural desire to be accepted. It is human nature. My daughter felt like a failure due to the "no boys like me issue" That for a female can crush you because you feel that you aren't a HIT unless the opposite sex confirms it. That couldn't be further from the truth. You don't need a male to validate you! You were great without them and will be greater if they choose to leave. You see know already know what they don't...that you have a lot to offer and that you are a great looking young lady and have a great personality. It is their loss if they pass you by-not yours. I gave her the hugs and all the love, but it meant nothing until she decided ok, i love me too!!!
Krissie, talk yourself through this while others are encouraging you!!! Say to the enemy, you can't have me!!! For every negative you receive, tell the enemy that he is a liar!!
It is difficult to diet when it appears that you have to purchase special foods to prepare. But it's not. Use what your parents have in the kitchen. Visit the foodnetwork website and modify the recipes. Use what you have in the kitchen!!! It doesn't have to be expensive. Chicken breasts only take a few minutes on the George Forman grill or about 15 min. in the oven baked. Add a little Italian dressing on it for flavor. If you have the type parent that prepares the meals without your input, like most youngsters do, ask your mom to put a couple cuts of meat to the side so you can prepare yours the way you would like. This will eliminate your being subjected to eating fried or heavily fatted foods. Eat more veggies, but eliminate the fat. A trick I've learned is drain the water from the can and use vegetable, chicken or beef broth to give more flavor without the calories. Your mom may have this in the kitchen. Stay away from soups that are high in sugar, fat, and sodium--if it has more than 4 gms of sugar---put it back. if it has more than 6 gms of fat---put it back and always attempt to keep the sodium under 400 mgs. As much as people declare to stay away from white refined foods, I will say this it is all about portion control. now if you know you can't eat a half cup of rice, stay away from it. If you know you will eat more than one slice of bread, stay away from it. It is about balance and discipline. Did we mention exercise? Dancing is GREAT!!! The artists you listen to have great music collections and you can tailor your dance workouts around the songs. moderate pace for your warm up, high paced songs for intensity and then the slow paced for your cool down. Start working toward a goal of a gallon of water a day. Sounds like a lot huh? It is. Start in the morning when you wake up to get to your goal. If plain old water sounds boring, add a lemon and some splenda to it and you have an instant, but affordable drink. Stay away from soft drinks-even the diet ones. Drink green tea if you have access to it. Again add a little artificial sweetner to it if you must.
Fall in love with Krissie and then fall in love with Krissie's future children. Love yourself in the manner that you expect to love your children.
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Old 06-05-2006, 08:02 PM   #12  
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Krissie -

I am not 17 but I am 20 and I remember being 17 all too well. I was always one of the biggest girls in school (right from a very early age of 5). At 17 I was 170-180 pounds and size 14ish.

I have never had a lot of friends and never had a lot of boys intrested in me. But let me tell you that MOST those boys in high school are a waste of time anyway. Pretty soon you will start meeting real people who don't care about how popular you are, what colour your hair is, where you buy your clothes, or how big you are. I was a bit of loner all my life - I was always made fun of and teased. I didn't come from the best home and was generally unhappy.

When I about 17 I got my first job. It was fast food but all the moving around helped me stay (slimer) and it also helped me get out of my house and away from all the things that upset. I would look forward to working - I just worked for a place in the food court and we only had a few employees so I got to know them all. No one knew that I was a loner in school and no one judged me. I found after I left that job I started gaining weight (really working in fast food helps!).

No only did I gain weight but I gained confidence. Even if I wasn't always happy I pretended to be happy and people believed it and I started making friends - people noticed you when you smile! I still don't have many friends but I am happy and still very much overweight.

Don't let your weight effect your happiness - I know sometimes it is hard but just try and smile and remember you are not alone. I still don't have many friends but I am happy with who I am. I have a boyfriend and we love each other with all our hearts. Apparence doesn't matter when your with the person you live.

Don't let all these things bother you - it is just high school and life is just beginning.

As hard as it is to believe your family does care. I always knew my mom and real dad did. But I have a step dad who is fair from a fairy tale. He always treated me like he didn't care - but that was just his way of showing he really did. People told me for years to move out of the house because it depressed me and made me feel worse - I never believe them. I moved out in January and let me tell you it was the best thing I ever did. Do it as soon as you can - you will be amazed how much better you will feel.

You can lose the weight, I know you can!

Sorry if this was long I just know EXACTLY how you feel and want you to know you are not alone. Feel free to PM me - I am here all day and always willing to chat. I also spend all day on MSN.

REMEMBER: SMILE!
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