Ugh. I'm disgusted with myself. I weighed myself this morning. Not a pretty sight (148). I'm really about to give up. My highest weight ever was 151...as this isn't my highest weight, it's pretty darn close. And if I keep doing what I'm doing I may make an all-time high. I don't know what to do anymore. That was so discouraging. I knew I was doing bad, but not that bad.
I know I need to watch my calorie intake...when I get home from school I have a tendency to pig out, and I need to fix that. I'm also so tired that I don't want to work out, and in the mornings I just can't get myself out of bed. I'm getting so mad at myself!! I want to look good by the time summer rolls around, but at this rate it'll never happen.
My advice would be that being disgusted with yourself isn't going to help. In fact it could really hinder you. When I was 16 and 140 pounds I thought I was enormous! Because I hated myself I ate loads. In the end I really was enormous!
So please, PLEASE, try to be kinder to yourself. The less pressure you put on yourself the easier it should be to eat less crap. So just take a deep breath and set yourself small measurable goals - I wont have any sugary drinks for example, or I'll exercise for 10 minutes every day. Once you reach these goals then set harder ones and so on. You can do it but if you do it by being nicer to yourself you're less likely to get in trouble later.
Hope this helps. Your self esteem shouldn't be based upon your weight. You're fabulous whatever you weigh!
Heather, how tall are you BTW? I'd chop off an arm to weigh 148!!
First of all, don't feel hopeless. Try taking a nap when you get in from school, that will stop you feeling tired and take you away from the kitchen. Then occupy yourself with some evening hobby that you can't possibly eat while doing... Something that gets your hands dirty or something like playing the sax that keeps your mouth occupied
Also make sure that you are eating enough early on in the day, so you are satisfied and not ravenous by the time 5pm rolls around.
I would have a snack mid-afternoon. You need to recharge your batteries briefly so that you can make it through to dinner.
I always have some protein and a piece of fruit around 2ish, and it keeps me going.
Good luck... don't get discouraged!
you could definately try looking thru some of the recipes on the website here and make some for a week at a time that you could have when you get home from school. i love the "egg muffins" i made this morning. it makes enough to have 2 at a time 6 days a week. only 108 calories for 2.
i agree with a nap if you are tired when you come home from school. even if you don't fall asleep, you may feel better when you get up, if you just lay there and try to clear your mind and let the stress of the day roll off of you.
the most important thing i am learning about food, is planning what to eat. if you have a plan, you are less likely to fall down.
Thanks so much for the advice everyone. I think the nap thing sounds like a good idea. And I'll definitely try out the recipes too. I'll also try to make it more of a priority to pack food for snacks and a lunch, since I'm on campus all day. Although I've said that before and I did it for about a week and then gave up.
2frustrated...to answer your question, I'm 5'2". I'm not really overweight, but when I look at myself I just feel gross. My clothes just look weird on me b/c of those dumn saddlebags. Since starting college, I gained about 15-20 pounds, which is why I have such a problem with the way I look. Gaining weight hasn't done much for my self-esteem
But again, thanks for the support and the ideas everyone.
Particularly in college, where snack machines and food are everywhere (at least they are on my campus) it's very important to plan when and what you're going to eat. I don't always plan dinner necessarily, but I know exactly what's going on for breakfast, lunch, and snack. I eat lunch before I head to my next class, I take a chilled bottle of water, and I always keep an apple or some kind of nutrition bar in my bag, because when I'm done at 3ish I feel ravenous. (Just look carefully at the nutrition info on the bars, some of them are really bad!) Also, I'm careful to never leave the house with cash or change when I go to campus so that even if I'm tempted by the snack machines I can't do anything about it.
I find that exercise is a slippery little cycle... When at first I don't feel like I have the energy to do it, doing it itself breeds more energy. Therefore, the 2nd time a the gym is always easier than the 1st, and so on and so forth. I know what you mean about it being difficult to drag yourself out of bed to exercise early in the mornings, and not wanting to do it in the evenings because you're tired... I can completely relate... BUT, the benefits really are worth it. You'll feel more energized, and you'll feel more proactive. Oh, and along the way you'll probably drop a couple pounds!
At a loss
You need to recharge your batteries briefly so that you can make it through to dinner. 
