Hi everyone,
I really wanted to join a community where I could find and give support. It's challenging to vent to some friends or family when they're not on the same "health" page as me. I'm sure most of you can attest to that.
I had previously tried the whole "low fat" foods and calorie restriction that the conglomerate's of the food industry advertise to us. I went to the gym and did cardio for an hour and hit the weights for another hour. Nothing worked. I always felt hungry and tired. I was so frustrated that my hard efforts were wasted. I gave up trying and remained the same. I then was diagnosed with Endometriosis and PCOS. At the time I was only 21 or so. I didn't realize that my poor lifestyle and diet more than likely contributed to this. It was a vicious cycle, pain lead to emotional eating which lead to more pain/inflammation and so on. I felt like crap all of the time.
About 2.5 years ago (can't believe it's been that long) I decided to do a complete overhaul on my health. People thought I was doing it for my upcoming wedding but I honestly was doing it for me. I went on a strict paleo diet. I started crossfit about two months into my diet. Everything changed. The weight literally melted off within the first two weeks of my diet. I believe I lost 12-15 pounds the first 14 days. As I started exercising the weight just kept coming off. Life was good. The pain from my endo/PCOS virtually disappeared and I was able to decrease my medication significantly. Overall, I lost 30 pounds. I had embraced these new habits and created a lifestyle.
Fast forward.. I picked up a second job and was working about 60 hours a week. Going to crossfit at 6AM was taking a toll on me and I discontinued going. We bought a house and money became very tight. Crossfit was extremely expensive so I gave it up. Wedding, honeymoon, holidays were all back to back and my diet began to slip. Healthy food became too "expensive". Oh, and my endo/PCOS discomfort came back full throttle.
So, here I am. I have gained about 15 pounds and loss most of the muscle I gained in crossfit. I am definitely not where I was before my initial weight loss but it is so frustrating to fall off the wagon. I don't want to go out. I feel uncomfortable in certain clothing. I don't like when my husband touches my stomach. And of course, I always complain about "how fat I am". I would look at pictures of myself in my "thinner days" and become sad. I know what I need to do but haven't had the will power to change.
I've done a lot of praying. I've asked God to help me do what I know is right. I've made a decision and I refuse to be controlled by food. I started making healthier and clean food decisions since Monday. So far I've not only lost three pounds but I feel so much better. I have energy and am not bloated. I know it's only the beginning but I will keep trucking along this journey.
Thanks for reading.
P.S.,
My mom brought french toast, hash browns, and an omelet with sausage to work this morning. I didn't even have a bite!
Here for support..
