My biggest issue is that since I don't have a car and no bus service where I live..I treat myself with food from delivery or close by. I literally have a McDonalds about 3 blocks away This has been going on for a long while...about 3 years now....I have ballooned out over 80 lbs to an all high of 274. I have just started WonderSlim because it helps me with portion sizes which are an issue here at the beginning. I just can't come up with a "treat" for myself and that is usually how I fall. I start feeling deprived and then there I go to McDonalds or some other fast food. It really is an addiction. Anyway, I got a guitar to try and learn...then I pinched a nerve in my shoulder and it is no fun picking it up now. I am so hearing McDonalds or Dominos calling me these past couple of days and I have only been on this plan less than 2 weeks....Any suggestions or comments on what y'all do would be appreciated...
Last edited by kitwander; 10-23-2014 at 03:24 AM.
Reason: correct sentence
Hi, you've come to the right place! Everyone is different, but I'll tell you what helps me. If it's something bad enough I will try to find a healthier way of making it, or I just say no. I want to add it is very hard to give up those kinds of foods at first, but after a while the cravings go away. If I want to treat myself it's usually a question of do I really need it? Do I really want it? Or is it something else I'm missing in my life that's causing this craving?
I don't know WonderSlim, so I don't know what options you have there. What works for me, is usually finding a healthier alternative. At the moment Homemade Wraps or Dips work for me and are satisfying enough to still any craving.
Also, distraction of your choice to keep your mind off of fast food.
I used to be a fast food addict myself. It was a compulsion to go through drive thrus. My work requires that I run around the city to different locations daily, and I scoped out all the fast food restaurants in every location I have to be. Just getting into the car makes me ask myself "Do I want Burger King or KFC?" I don't like to think of it as an addiction, it was a compulsive behavior for me, I didn't feel like I could control it. I tried dieting, and eating healthier. I was told that if I eat healthy food for a while that my cravings would go away. That never happened for me, in fact my compulsion grew stronger and stronger and I would make excuses to leave the house after dinner "Oh I have to run to the pharmacy and pick up some lip balm!" and then I'd sneak off to gobble up some fast food in secret. The amount of shame and guilt I felt over this was unbearable and I saught help for this eating disorder.
So then I started practicing Intuitive Eating and realized that deprivation was causing me to binge like this. At first that didn't make sense, how was I depriving myself? On the contrary I felt like I was over indulging myself! But there were many strings attached to my indulgence. The guilt, the shame and the self disgust were deteriorating my mental health. I was indulging in a lot of last-supper eating, meaning that everytime I binged I promised myself that tomorrow I'd eat right and be healthier, which then caused me to go ahead and over eat because starting tomorrow I won't be allowed to eat this food again. I was forever criticizing myself for eating bad food. Food was either GOOD or BAD. Carbs were bad, calories were bad, fat was bad. Everything I enjoyed eating was bad. When I ate GOOD food I felt like a goood person. When I ate BAD food I thought of myself as a bad person. Mostly I was bad bad bad, my self esteem had gotten so low that I didn't trust myself around food, I felt isolated and addicted and I saw no way out.
The process of IE is a little involved to explain arbitrarily, so I won't unless you ask me to. It is a slow progress, I've only lost 20lbs in 8 months but I feel ZERO fear that the weight will come back. I eat all the foods I love in the quantities that I want. I have rid myself of the compulsion to eat fast food and binge. I trust myself around food. I can go to social events and not feel restricted or embarrassed. I no longer eat secretly. I have tons of junk food in my house that I never seem to get around to eating. I am able to refuse food, and I rarely eat my plate clean. I exercise now because I love to move my body and feel active, and because it's fun. Before I was exercising to punish my body for over eating, and I wanted to make sure I was burning x amount of calories each time. It was no fun. I'm still surprised by how little food it takes to satisfy me.
The best part is that I've grown to love who I am, I look in the mirror and although I'm still obese I love my body now, I don't abuse it anymore with harsh mean words. I am a completely different person now.
I like to view nourishing my body with foods that makes me feel good and exercising for increased strength as a treat in and of its self. I too used to feel the need to treat myself with food, but then I changed my mindset to see the healthy habits as the treat. Going for a walk, learning a dance, having an in home spa night, taking time for meditation, doing yoga.....all these things could be treats as well. Good luck!
I am so hearing McDonalds or Dominos calling me these past couple of days and I have only been on this plan less than 2 weeks....Any suggestions or comments on what y'all do would be appreciated...
Are there any thrift shops near you? I've rediscovered thrift shops (for clothes) and it's become my fix. If you sift carefully through the merchandise, you can find high-end brands in mint condition for under $10. As an addiction I recommend it highly, because it keeps your mind on the prize (well, one of the prizes): looking good in great clothes.
Hmmm, when I've absolutely got to have something, I like a fresh cup of decent coffee... Seems like a nice, hot cup of hazelnut or something along those lines can help deter my craving for other, more calorie-laden items.
We've all been there- and still are! There will always be foods we love! My fave trick I learned on 3FC is saying "I know that cookie tastes like". For example, I don't need 10 chips ahoy cookies because I've already had them before- it's not like I'm missing out on some new exotic cuisine. Also, I remind myself that in about 30 seconds, I'd be left with more calories, but still not eating. I used to wish I could have some magical snack to munch on for an hour but food just doesn't last that long.
So, ride out the craving. If you have the McDonald's, in 10 minutes, you'll be right back where you started.
Lastly, HAVE IT SOMETIMES! Don't cut it out but plan for it. Maybe make Friday your McDonald's day (as a random example). I don't personally like banning foods- have what you love, but everything in moderation. Good luck and we all believe in you!
I completely agree with freelancemama. Clothes are a GREAT treat because as the sizes go down, you need them, but thrifting is a good way to keep the costs down too.
I also don't deprive myself of foods that I like. If I want a burger or pizza, or fried chicken, I'll find a healthy recipe to replicate the flavors that I want.
Do you have a significant other living with you? One of my rewards/feel-good things I treat myself to is my boyfriend gives me a massage. Costs nothing and feels good Other things I have picked out for small goals nail polish, make-up, picture frames, kindle books, and video games. Most everything I have picked out.. save for the make-up.. is in the 10--15 dollar range. A lot of it can be ordered online too.
You could also still treat yourself to McDonalds, but still to healthier stuff on the menu. Even if you get a burger.. one burger a month isn't going to make you gain back weight on all it's own.
I agree with Wannabeskinny in that you should really explore the desire. Is it just to go to McDonalds, or is the desire to actually binge? Is it the need for a reward or is there something else to it? Figuring out my own mental processes and then figuring out what works for me has been a large part of this diet journey. It's also kept me on track, and helped me not to feel bad when I got off plan for a day so I don't end up hating myself.. and I don't really binge anymore, which is actually really liberating. You do have to sort of figure yourself out though, a large part of it is mental, and it can take a long time to dissect.
OH I totally didn't say what I treat myself with! lol!
Anything online shopping. I give myself 50 bucks for online shopping and go nuts. I try to budget really well so letting myself shop online for crappy romance novels, new make up or scented candles is motivation enough! I don't have a mall where I live so online is the only way to go!
I used to be a fast food addict myself. It was a compulsion to go through drive thrus. My work requires that I run around the city to different locations daily, and I scoped out all the fast food restaurants in every location I have to be. Just getting into the car makes me ask myself "Do I want Burger King or KFC?" I don't like to think of it as an addiction, it was a compulsive behavior for me, I didn't feel like I could control it. I tried dieting, and eating healthier. I was told that if I eat healthy food for a while that my cravings would go away. That never happened for me, in fact my compulsion grew stronger and stronger and I would make excuses to leave the house after dinner "Oh I have to run to the pharmacy and pick up some lip balm!" and then I'd sneak off to gobble up some fast food in secret. The amount of shame and guilt I felt over this was unbearable and I saught help for this eating disorder.
So then I started practicing Intuitive Eating and realized that deprivation was causing me to binge like this. At first that didn't make sense, how was I depriving myself? On the contrary I felt like I was over indulging myself! But there were many strings attached to my indulgence. The guilt, the shame and the self disgust were deteriorating my mental health. I was indulging in a lot of last-supper eating, meaning that everytime I binged I promised myself that tomorrow I'd eat right and be healthier, which then caused me to go ahead and over eat because starting tomorrow I won't be allowed to eat this food again. I was forever criticizing myself for eating bad food. Food was either GOOD or BAD. Carbs were bad, calories were bad, fat was bad. Everything I enjoyed eating was bad. When I ate GOOD food I felt like a goood person. When I ate BAD food I thought of myself as a bad person. Mostly I was bad bad bad, my self esteem had gotten so low that I didn't trust myself around food, I felt isolated and addicted and I saw no way out.
The process of IE is a little involved to explain arbitrarily, so I won't unless you ask me to. It is a slow progress, I've only lost 20lbs in 8 months but I feel ZERO fear that the weight will come back. I eat all the foods I love in the quantities that I want. I have rid myself of the compulsion to eat fast food and binge. I trust myself around food. I can go to social events and not feel restricted or embarrassed. I no longer eat secretly. I have tons of junk food in my house that I never seem to get around to eating. I am able to refuse food, and I rarely eat my plate clean. I exercise now because I love to move my body and feel active, and because it's fun. Before I was exercising to punish my body for over eating, and I wanted to make sure I was burning x amount of calories each time. It was no fun. I'm still surprised by how little food it takes to satisfy me.
The best part is that I've grown to love who I am, I look in the mirror and although I'm still obese I love my body now, I don't abuse it anymore with harsh mean words. I am a completely different person now.
While we do not see eye to eye on many issues. I do agree that removing the "last supper mentality" is critical to success. Some things about IE agree with, others I don't, (and I do believe in the science supporting food addiction) HOWEVER, white-knuckling it past your cravings will typically end in swinging in the other direction and binging on those foods, especially if you have a history of binging. Also if you are thinking of those things as a reward or treating yourself (something we do to care for ourselves or show ourselves compassion, it wont take much to rationalize eating them to be nice to yourself. That type of thinking is only one bad day away from binging on those foods.
Its hard to explain, but if you those food are no longer off limits, and you realize you are choosing not to eat them, its less of a struggle. Though I disagree on not calling them bad. They ARE bad! They are unhealthy and bad for you! Don't delude yourself into all food is ok, because that's simply not true, but also know that you can't be perfect. Its ok to have those things once in a while if that's what you want to eat. Sometimes its ok to eat something simply because its good, but the key is making sure most of the time you are eating foods that are nutritious, follow whatever weight loss plan you have chosen and of course you should like those as well.
I think the way I have changed my thinking, is that I no longer seek out those foods. Its not like I think "I have to have a pumpkin spiced latte so I'm going to drive across town to get one". To me that takes on the treat mentality. I'm treating myself there for I'm going to go find that food to eat it. But a few days ago, last minute I met a friend at the mall, and there is a starbucks in there (where I am we only have a few. They're not every 5 feet like the west coast) and I walked right past the starbucks and I was like, Oh I think I'll get a latte. I wasn't feeling I deserved on or that I was rewarding myself. I was there, it sounded good and sometimes when we are there I pass it up, and sometimes I don't.
On the subject of treating myself, for me clothing is a treat. I RARELY clothes shop and when I do it is thrift stores (like freelancemama) and ebay. I usually feel tremendous guilt when I buy clothes, so that's why that's a way I treat myself. Can you find another way to treat yourself besides food? Ebay is nice because you can window shop for hours for anything and if you don't want to spend a ton of money, a lot of the stuff is cheap!
...Though I disagree on not calling them bad. They ARE bad! They are unhealthy and bad for you! Don't delude yourself into all food is ok, because that's simply not true, but also know that you can't be perfect. Its ok to have those things once in a while if that's what you want to eat. Sometimes its ok to eat something simply because its good, but the key is making sure most of the time you are eating foods that are nutritious, follow whatever weight loss plan you have chosen and of course you should like those as well.
I'm not saying that all food is "good." Of course I understand and respect the nutritional value of what I put into my body. I'm not deluded. What I was describing, which may not have been conveyed clearly is that I attached my self worth to the food I was eating. A fresh salad is a healthier choice than a cheeseburger. But that doesn't mean that if I eat the salad I suddenly become a better person, my self esteem should not rest on that. But the power of ying and yang is at play, if I do allow myself to feel pride about eating a salad I run the risk of making myself feel really really really bad when I choose the burger. So, I remain neutral. I don't judge the food I eat, rather I choose to review my eating experience. Was it enjoyable? Did it make me feel good? Did it make me feel bloated? Do I want to feel this way again after I eat this? Asking myself these questions was once impossible, I couldn't see past my own nose when I was stuck in the morality of food.
Food is food. It can't hurt you on its own. If one continues to binge on burgers then it will have a substantial impact on your health sooner or later. Real health though comes from HOW you eat. I don't keep tally but I can easily tell you that I choose a big salad over a burger 90% of the time. The reason I choose the salad is because at that moment I crave the crunchy fresh flavors, because I can feel my body crave the nutrients perhaps, because I really just want to eat a salad! It's not a moral decision, I'm not a good person because I did it, I'm just responding to my body's needs. I've gotten really good at IE. Sometimes even if I want a burger in the moment I don't have the heart to choose it because I remember that big burgers make me feel bloated and most of the time I'm not up for it. So maybe I'll eat my light meal and possibly just steal a bite of burger from my husband which is quite enough satisfying to me. Cravings aren't bad, you just have to know how to satisfy them in a normal way, not a crazy bingy kind of way.
Bottom line, I'm learning to be neutral about food. The weird thing is that if I tell myself that a food is bad it causes me to seek it and binge on it. I've been down that road, heck that was my zipcode! I'm better off just treating all food like it's the same and allowing my body to choose the healthy things it's obviously and loudly (finally) seeking.
Last edited by Palestrina; 10-23-2014 at 04:10 PM.
What do you treat yourself with?
This has been going on for a long while...about 3 years now....I have ballooned out over 80 lbs to an all high of 274. I have just started WonderSlim because it helps me with portion sizes which are an issue here at the beginning. I just can't come up with a "treat" for myself and that is usually how I fall. I start feeling deprived and then there I go to McDonalds or some other fast food. It really is an addiction. Anyway, I got a guitar to try and learn...then I pinched a nerve in my shoulder and it is no fun picking it up now. I am so hearing McDonalds or Dominos calling me these past couple of days and I have only been on this plan less than 2 weeks....Any suggestions or comments on what y'all do would be appreciated...
