Hey so im Kyn and im 27 yrs old I weigh 356 lbs. Just typing that out made me begin to cry. Ive been having alot of health issues the last few yrs.... my legs are always swollen, chest pain, shortness of breath and literally the list could go on n on. I seen a heart specialists today and he looked at me and asked if I wanted to die... because thats whats gonna happen if I dont Change my life.this isnt something im doing just now ive been trying to change since march..... but the cutting out junk omg especially the soda... its hard and makes it harder when u have to feed a family too who doesnt support you or what u need. They tell me its time to start putting me first but I feel guilty because that means my son doesnt always get what he wants or because the rest of the family refuses to eat cause I made rice instead of potatoes. .... the doctors say i need to find my motivation and my fire.... but I dont know if I have that.... anyway that is me I look forward to hearing from yall
Hi Kyn That's rough not having the support from your family, but I also agree you have to put yourself first. I don't have a family, but I want to live a long life with my bf, so besides the vanity of being thin, I really want to be healthy. It's a big challenge, but you certainly can do it! And if they don't like the rice, so be it! (easier said than done right?) I cook for two, and I usually cook two meals because not only am I eating low calorie, I also don't eat meat (my bf LOVES meat) and I have many other food allergies. I make a healthy meal for my bf and one for me every night for dinner. Maybe you can do that? It's a lot of work, but you won't have the guilt and their sabotaging ways to stall you?
Last edited by Chardonnay; 10-08-2014 at 11:50 PM.
That must have been a hard post to write. Congratulate yourself on making that step.
How old is your son? Is he overweight? Does he have bad eating habits? If he does then helping him eat healthy is a gift not something to feel guilty over. My parents were/are very fit and healthy. We did not get a say as to what we ate. It was cooked, we were served it and if we didn't eat it then it was removed. Fruit was 95% of the time the only snack food available to us. I tell you we didn't starve and neither will your son if he misses a meal or two at the beginning. He won't miss them for long I promise.
Have you considered seeing a nutritionalist who can help you make healthy alternatives of the family's favourite foods? That might help.
It seems you are at rock bottom. Clearly things need to change. Change is hard and uncomfortable. As you have little support at home have you thought about going to a support group?
My approach this time has been to make one change at a time, maybe that is something you can try. Say for example soda. The only thing you change is to stop drinking soda for as long as it takes to feel comfortable and then make another change.
Whatever you choose good luck and keep posting! You can do this!
Kyn,
I feel like I was reading a page from my life (minus the son). I understand completely where you are coming from and am crying right along with you.
There has to be light at the end of the tunnel, right?
I know the feeling. In fact I feel like I am sabotaged from time to time. For me, I'm a dad so it easier, I just leave the room. I have my stuff, they have theirs. My wife still buys the bread, sandwhich meats, chips, ice cream. All this stuff just is so hard for me to pass up. I can't eat with my family, so I eat separately from them. It also helps to be on a program.
Anyway, I feel for you. I hope you figure out a way to focus on yourself first, and lose the weight you want to.
Ahhh mother guilt! Its a tough one kyn, I have two little boys so I know where you are coming from. Its time to stop feeling guilty and start putting yourself higher up the list. It is hard but maybe start with small changes, like the soda or take some time to go for a walk. I cook in our household so my men don't have much choice! But if they are protesting about new food, concentrate on your portions and bump up your vege - yes little kids can be a pain when it comes to new food options (there are times when I swear my three year old looks at me like im poisoning him!) Also its another important life skill to teach them, you can't eat what you like when you like without consequence.
Don't let life get in your way, because the alternative just doesn't beg to think about.
start small, love, and start with YOU. every time you don't drink a soda or eat some junk food, put the money in a jar FOR YOUR USE ONLY. you can use it to buy healthy foods that you like but your family doesn't, or maybe get your son that special little something. it's also a way to quickly see some progress in making changes.
You're NOT going to lose the weight overnight, and you're NOT going to change your family's eating habits overnight either. Start small and choose your battles, but make sure that YOU are eating as healthfully as you can.
And about your son. Many children don't get everything they want - but they do get what they need. It's hard to say NO, but it's a life lesson. If we're talking about the latest iPhone, does he really need it?
Finding strength and motivation is challenging indeed! Start making small changes in your life. Sometimes it's not about how fast you lose weight, but the quality in which you lose the weight. It's taken me four years to lose 67 pounds, so I think i'm probably the slowest loser in this forum, but it all started with small changes. Congratulations on your first step in joining this forum. You've found a community of people who understands what you are feeling. This is the place where you can share your ups and downs and celebrate your accomplishments and goals.
not exactly new but still drowning
I look forward to hearing from yall
