For a while now I have just been bouncing around back and forth in my weight. I lose some, gain it back. Like I do well for a week or 2 sometimes a few months and then everything falls apart.
I have alot of issues with confidence, feel strong enough, willpower & control.
I feel like being on plan & doing what I need to do takes so much focus, willpower and is such a mental fight for me. It takes just so much work to stick to it and it is so easy to fall off the path and then somehow let it all go out the window.
I KNOW it is on me. It is my life & there will always be obstacles. I know if I mess up it is my choice. Yet at the same time my husband is making it 10 times harder.
For example My biggest weakness in the world is pizza. So all of the time he is like lets order pizza....I don't currently have the willpower to say no or to just limit myself. It is so difficult. A few months ago i was doing really well and did stand up and say no I am trying to be healthy! Very proud of myself for half a second...because then he tells me he isn't on a diet and so I can just order it for him. So i say well lets just get one med pizza and no extras to share and he is like no I want my own. I just surrender and then feel bad about myself and stuff my face even worse.
He wants to grab fast food all the time, brings in junk food & snacks. And I get that he isn't interested in changing himself but it is just so damn hard for me.
I just feel like I am undertaking this huge change and every single day is a fight to stay focused and make the right choices and he just is making it that much more difficult for me.
I have tried talking to him and sometimes he just gets on the offensive like I am trying to make him change. And other times he will be sweet and say he will try but the next day it seems to go right out the window.
I think I am mostly just venting. But I would love to hear advice on sharing a house with anyone who isn't trying to be healthy & how you deal with it.
Pizza is a big weakness of many people, including myself. When the pizza shows up. Leave the house. Go on a walk. Go to the gym. Leave the house. Tell your husband in advance what you're doing and why you're doing it. Expect him not to be happy.
I for one, cannot eat a single slice of pizza. 1 means I'll be eating four minimum. So avoidance is the only thing that works for me.
Some people are going to pop in here and tell you to make a healthy pizza when he orders his regular pizza. That's worth a shot I suppose but it wouldn't work for me. I advocate pizza avoidance.
Hi hun... sorry your going through this. If I were you I would treat your weight and eating issues as a disease that has to be kept under control. I know how hard it is. My husband is not as bad, but still I feel bad if I say no when he wants to eat out or order pizza. Now what I do is he'll get the pizza and I'll go to the store and buy something healthy that I would not normally buy and I'll have something different as well. Or what I do is I'll tell him ok you and our son can have the pizza night and I'll be in my room scrapbooking to help me stay focused on my health. Let me tell you though my husband would not order it if I told him it bothered me so mabye you need to have a serious heart to heart with your hubby and explain to him that you need him on your side. If he's in the mood for pizza maybe he can get it for lunch at work, or maybe stop by on the way home. At least until your feeling like you can conquor the cravings and only eat 1 slice.
Sorry your going through this. Don't give up.. You can do this!!
That sounds really hard. Pizza is my achilles heal too. I can't even smell something remotely like pizza without craving it - and I can't have just one slice either.
I agree with the advice of avoiding the pizza at all costs. Like Jon and Sassy said - could you maybe go do something else?
I think you may need to have a frank talk with your husband about how much you want this and how hard it is for you to avoid temptation if he keeps them around. Maybe you could work out a compromise - perhaps there is some night you are out each week he could order pizza? Also, is it possible he doesn't want you to lose weight? (you hear stories around here where husbands get a little nervous about the wife losing weight).
For me what works when my hubby brings me a quarter pounder from McDonald's is I take the bun off and eat the burger only..when he wants to get pizza, I eat only what is on top of the crust and then throw the crust away..good luck sweetie..it is hard..I know
i practice being a food snob for MOST of the unhealthy things around here, i have developed a dislike of them because they are cheap, crappy, processed things...like packaged crackers, or cup o noodles, or things like that...
on the other hand, i pack the kids lunches and i cook nearly all dinners so i have a huge say in what is in the house to begin with...luckily for me, DH will eat whatever is around....sometimes though he will bring home huge tubs of ice cream, or boxes of cookies or something and it's hard to stay out of those....it helps to label it in my head as "NOT MINE"...those are for the teenager, or those are for DH, etc...it is NOT MINE to get into and eat their food, just like i wouldn't go in the work fridge and eat someone else's lunch
for pizza in particular, which is a weakness of mine, i only do it for dinners maybe once a month and then i just eat how much i want and it doesn't affect my weight as long as it's only once a month
Pizza is a big weakness of many people, including myself. When the pizza shows up. Leave the house. Go on a walk. Go to the gym. Leave the house. Tell your husband in advance what you're doing and why you're doing it. Expect him not to be happy.
I for one, cannot eat a single slice of pizza. 1 means I'll be eating four minimum. So avoidance is the only thing that works for me.
Some people are going to pop in here and tell you to make a healthy pizza when he orders his regular pizza. That's worth a shot I suppose but it wouldn't work for me. I advocate pizza avoidance.
THIS. I live with a room mate who has been my friend since childhood. She is just as heavy as I am and planned to start dieting with me (Since I'm the only one who cooks), but it didn't work out. When I had only been on this diet a week, she and a mutual friend of ours ordered a pizza AND tormented me for not eating it. I sleep in the living room, and it was midnight in Chicago, so going somewhere to escape wasn't an option. It was rough, but I ate an apple, and sucked it up. And I felt way better about it after it was over.
Note:Since then, she orders food AFTER DINNER about 3-4 times a week. :/ it gets easier once you learn to enjoy the feeling of being able to say no.
Also, I've said this on the boards before and a lot of people disagree, I think it's a totally personal choice: Have a cheat day. I schedule a cheat day at the end of every month (yes I WILL be having Pizza on Sunday for the G.O.T. premiere). When I want something my room mate is eating I think...I can have it if I really want it in x amount of weeks, days, whatever. If you're the type of person who can cheat for just a day or a weekend and not fall off the wagon, I recommend it.
My husband misses pizza. He told me that the other day, so we went to Mellow Mushroom and I ordered a Greek salad (290 cal) and its seriously the most amazing salad ever. I ate my salad before his pizza came and then I only ate about 1/2 of a slice because I was full.
It was a HUGE non scale victory for me, because in the past I would eat at least 4 pieces, often more. Those Greek salads are so amazing, I think I could pass on a lot of my favorites for those.
I have little kids, and one is in school so we keep "lunch box food" in the house, primarily fun size candy bars. That was always a struggle for me so I asked my husband to hide them from me, and he did. He packs lunch for the big kid in the morning so I don't ever have to know where they are.
It took my husband a long while to understand how to support me, but as I learned to tell him exactly what I needed from him, he started getting better.
Oddly enough we had pizza tonight for dinner. I had 2 slices and a salad. I wanted more but I knew I would not be happy with myself in the morning or even later tonight. I have not always had this will power. I am not sure where it has come from but I was able to make it! My problem is living with those that arent eating healthy is that I buy the junk they like and the healthy stuff I like and need to eat but what happens? THEY eat my healthy stuff and their junk!!! Makes me crazy!
Oddly enough we had pizza tonight for dinner. I had 2 slices and a salad. I wanted more but I knew I would not be happy with myself in the morning or even later tonight. I have not always had this will power. I am not sure where it has come from but I was able to make it! My problem is living with those that arent eating healthy is that I buy the junk they like and the healthy stuff I like and need to eat but what happens? THEY eat my healthy stuff and their junk!!! Makes me crazy!
THIS exactly!! if i want to save something just for me, i take it to work LOL....i have access to a fridge, freezer and microwave there....and i always keep other stuff around the house that they can feel free to dip into - veggies, fruits, whole wheat bread etc....
Well I am on Spring Break at the moment so all of my food is here and not just at work. I also have access to a fridge, freezer, microwave and a toaster oven! Next week will be so much easier!
Can you say to your husband that if he wants to eat junk that's fine but can he go for a drive and buy the pizza in person, sit in the car and eat it. Then come back home. So you are not exposed to it?.
I'm doing well. My plan is kind of weird and I made it up myself so it's in no way scientific haha, I'll PM you
Update: I can't PM you lol. I basically cut out all starch. I started on the first of the month, have lost about 22 lbs which is expected for a first month. I eat around 1200 calories a day, and I watch my protein more than anything. Notice I cut out starch not CARBS, so I still eat a lot of fruits and veggies. I also plan to add something new on the first of every month in hopes of avoiding a major plateau. For ex: This month I ONLY did diet, on April 1 I will start power walking 6 days a week, on May 1 (actually fifth due to my finals schedule) I will ADD Jillian Michael's body revolution, on June 1st I'll sub one half hour of walking with elliptical while still walking at least an hour a day, etc. If you're able to message me and have any questions feel free.
Living with those who are not healthy
But I would love to hear advice on sharing a house with anyone who isn't trying to be healthy & how you deal with it.
