Over the past few months I have been on a few dates and have been talking to guys and I've noticed a lot of them have this one thing in common that annoys the crap out of me: they compliment me TOO much! Now, I like being complimented, and I like the mushy-gushy "OMG you're amazing and beautiful" stuff, but only when it's appropriate. I don't like it every time I turn around. Like, I'm texting this one guy now, and he ends just about everything he says by addressing me as gorgeous or beautiful.
"How's your day, gorgeous?"
"Oh that's funny, beautiful"
"I have to work today, sexy"
Seriously, the conversation isn't flirty or anything it's just every day chit chat and I don't require being called sexy or beautiful all the time! If I DO something sexy or you see me and I look good, then tell me so! But otherwise, if I'm just like... coming out of the room or getting up to go do something, or I walk, or breathe... no those aren't necessary times to compliment me, lol. Am I weird about that? I just feel like there's a time and a place for everything and SO many guys just over-do it and I feel like it makes them seem desperate and annoying. Is it just a lack of confidence or what?
Sorry, I don't know if its supposed to be funny, but it kinda is.
They probably really are just trying to flatter you, although I can imagine it gets annoying when it's that consistent. I do know that there are some guys that just speak like that, but at the same time, if it really does bug you and you feel comfortable enough, I would just tell the guy that you don't feel these "compliments" are sincere when they follow everything he says.
But honestly, if anything becomes serious, that "mushy-gushy" stuff probably won't last too long anyways, so it probably wouldn't be anything to worry about long term.
My husband of almost 9 years still call me sweet things like that, and trust me, it awesome that he still does it after so long! We don't even call each other by name... It feels awkward to us.
I mean I WANT the guys to think I'm sexy! Of course I do! But I mean seriously not everything a person does is sexy. Like, it's not sexy when I go to the bathroom. Or when I'm just like sitting here in my pajamas being a bum, that's not very sexy, lol. But the thing is it's like they don't really say anything else or have a conversation, they're just telling me I'm amazing and beautiful the whole time. It's annoying.
I for one am exceedingly sexy when I'm on the toilet (especially after a night of beer and wings).
There are worse problems to have. What if they were like "hey buttface" or "you ever thought about joining a gym?" or "sorry I'm not attracted to you" - that said, I feel like those kinds of comments are creepy when not coming from someone I feel super comfortable around and/or familiar with. My boyfriend and I have NAUSEATING pet names for each other but didn't start that up until we'd known each other for a few months.
I view dudes who throw those things around too much as lesser somehow, like they're too dumb to make real conversation and just assume my self-esteem is so low that as long as I'm constantly praised on my looks I won't care if he's actually a cool person or not.
I view dudes who throw those things around too much as lesser somehow, like they're too dumb to make real conversation and just assume my self-esteem is so low that as long as I'm constantly praised on my looks I won't care if he's actually a cool person or not.
ok this is the second time I've quoted you and agreed today. I promise I'm not stalking you, I just agree... again! LOL.
I for one am exceedingly sexy when I'm on the toilet (especially after a night of beer and wings).
There are worse problems to have. What if they were like "hey buttface" or "you ever thought about joining a gym?" or "sorry I'm not attracted to you" - that said, I feel like those kinds of comments are creepy when not coming from someone I feel super comfortable around and/or familiar with. My boyfriend and I have NAUSEATING pet names for each other but didn't start that up until we'd known each other for a few months.
I view dudes who throw those things around too much as lesser somehow, like they're too dumb to make real conversation and just assume my self-esteem is so low that as long as I'm constantly praised on my looks I won't care if he's actually a cool person or not.
Ha! You're funny; this post made me chuckle to myself.
I view dudes who throw those things around too much as lesser somehow, like they're too dumb to make real conversation and just assume my self-esteem is so low that as long as I'm constantly praised on my looks I won't care if he's actually a cool person or not.
This this this this this! This is exactly what I mean.
I don't care how sexy you think I am; if you can't have conversation with me or make attempts to get to know me beyond my face, then it's a problem! They ask how my day is going, and I tell them, and they don't care about that. They just keep telling me I'm pretty. They don't ask about me or show interest in me personally, it's like all they care about is that I'm pretty. And then they wonder why I think they're a perv or a loser, lol.
I'm the same way! I realize now as I get older that I'm not a very affectionate person naturally. So I can find it hard to accept compliments and I'm not super touchy feely. I dated someone who liked to be touched and hugged a lot and so I did it because it made him happy but it's not my natural instinct.
I say just go with it. It might not be about what you need but what he needs to say to you. It also might be a hint that he would like to hear those things from you.