I'd like to gain more self confidence. If I can get that, the rest will follow because I won't be so hesitant about trying things anymore. The better I feel about my health and self, the more confident I will be overall, I believe.
For me? I will wake up with more energy, fit comfortably into my size 6 pants, have an awesome breakfast, look myself in the mirror and smile, and go to work confident that I look my personal best...and twiddle my tumbs excitedly so I can wear my bathing suit on the weekend.
Mini Rant LOL
Losing weight will definitely increase the number of guys looking at you, and probably give a confidence boost, but I would focus on the health aspects. Having been around the block, I have met various wonderful (and not so wonderful) guys at various weights....and I can tell you plenty of heavier women than myself who would get a better looking guy hands down because of their personality and confidence. Losing weight will help with health, *could* help with alot self-imposed restraints, and will definitely make shopping easier...BUT focus on how much MORE awesome you'll be as you continue to lose. Don't let anything hold you back from finding a great guy/girl today! There is always going to be someone smarter, prettier, and thinner than me (although your Mom might not agree), but overall, I think I am catch. So does my BF and his family!
Be the best teacher I can be and eventually rise to a position where I can truly impact how children with special needs are educated in this country.
Get a doctorate so I can rise to the above position, become a professor and impact future teachers
Earn enough income so that my fiancee can be a stay at home dad.
Give my future family a healthy lifestyle so that my children do not have the same issues I had
Retire comfortably; possibly run off to some warm place with the future husband when the weather gets cold
Granted I don't expect all of the above to happen, but it would be nice.
EDIT: Your physical appearance shouldn't really be the determining factor in finding love. You CAN find love at any weight! Don't wait until goal to put yourself out there.
My fiancee met and began dating me at my starting weight We were going out for three years before I even began losing weight and he had nothing to do with it. Whether I've been 200 pounds or 146 pounds, he still can't keep his hands off me
I'd like to gain more self confidence. If I can get that, the rest will follow because I won't be so hesitant about trying things anymore. The better I feel about my health and self, the more confident I will be overall, I believe.
I'm with you on this one! Plus gain the energy to get more things done. I tire too easily right now but have a list of things I want to accomplish a mile long
Mini Rant LOL
Losing weight will definitely increase the number of guys looking at you, and probably give a confidence boost, but I would focus on the health aspects. Having been around the block, I have met various wonderful (and not so wonderful) guys at various weights....and I can tell you plenty of heavier women than myself who would get a better looking guy hands down because of their personality and confidence. Losing weight will help with health, *could* help with alot self-imposed restraints, and will definitely make shopping easier...BUT focus on how much MORE awesome you'll be as you continue to lose. Don't let anything hold you back from finding a great guy/girl today! There is always going to be someone smarter, prettier, and thinner than me (although your Mom might not agree), but overall, I think I am catch. So does my BF and his family!
Another veteran poster from back in my heyday messaged me the other day and said she posts a lot less now and just reads... She says it's different on this forum than it used to be, and that the vibe is more about "gettin' hot" than "gettin' healthy." This post made me happy because it proves that this forum hasn't changed that much!!!!
Not to say that most of us wouldn't say no to a little extra hotness that comes with the territory of getting our sh*t together, but I love to see that this whole thread is filled with posts about self confidence and health and happiness.
Love mah 3FC ladies!
And Teekz: You can meet a man and fall in love at ANY weight; it's not something you need to dream about! Focus on you, your confidence and your health... And let the dream man come into the picture whenever he comes along.
Nothing else in your life will change except your weight - unless you change it!
Being thinner doesn't create a magical life. Thin people have just as many problems, trials and tribulations, body image issues, and challenging life events as heavier people. That doesn't mean you can't use the empowering process of controlling your body's size and shape to also learn how to manage other areas of your life more effectively if you want to - but it won't happen all by itself.
My weight will no longer be a scapegoat. If I don't achieve something, it's not because of my weight. It won't even factor into my day. I won't even think about the way my body looks. I will know it is fit, it is properly functioning, and can do anything I need it to do.
My body will be a tool, to get where I want to go.
I totally respect that to some people, weight does not affect their "ideal life" - but to me, at least, weight plays a huge role in what I'd like to get out of life.
Being overweight has kept me from doing so many things I have wanted to do. I love playing softball, volleyball, and frisbee - those are my three favorite activities to do outdoors. I have had ample opportunities over the years to do those things. But I turn them down. I didn't want to run around feeling uncomfortable, that my shirt will ride up, my stomach will jiggle profusely, or that my boobs will slap me in the face. In all seriousness, I understand how weight can hold you back.
However, I have to agree with the posters saying weight shouldn't have to do with finding a relationship. I assure you that if you look hard enough, you will find someone to love you for who you are. That being said, I totally understand letting your weight hold you back from pursuing a romantic partner. I am not saying you are misconstruing your problem - but you may just be. Is the problem that men are attracted to you, or is the problem that you not letting anyone in? Believe me, I've been there! ****, I still am there! But at some point, you have to start loving yourself, even at the weight you are at.
It seems weird to people who are overweight - oftentimes we begin to hate who we are. We associate our happier and better selves with "skinnier" versions of ourselves. While I have not remotely reached my goal weight, I can honestly tell you - if you are unhappy with yourself and your life at the weight you are now, losing weight will not magically change that. And to be quite honest, you have to change that mentality before you will ever become truly successful at attaining long-term weight loss.
I'm a huge hypocrite for saying that as I am still learning how to love myself and the person I am without associating my self-worth to my weight. But from one self-loather to another... it's not just the weight.
To answer your question, my ideal life will consist of not letting my weight hold me back - plain and simple. I want to be better in all aspects of life and become the person that I know I am. I am learning, just like you, what it will take to be truly happy.
Good luck in your journey - you will find happiness/your ideal life. Just don't expect it to come from a number on the scale.
what will your ideal life look like?
We were going out for three years before I even began losing weight and he had nothing to do with it. Whether I've been 200 pounds or 146 pounds, he still can't keep his hands off me 
