Sad. I was standing outside talking to one of my neighbors here in Romania. She is from the US also, but originally from Romania so speaks both languages. Anyway, there was two Romanian workers working on an electrical box outside and one of them said to the other in Romanian, "look at those two chubby americans, they look nothing like the girls on TV, they make american girls look bad." The neighbor heard them and told me what the just said, she's use to Romanians and they're forwardness, so it did not bother her much. I acted like i didnt mind. Then went inside and bawled for the next 2 hrs. I felt like I was doing good and that finally no one would look at me and think I was chubby...maybe not think I was skinny, but average atleast. i know I shouldnt care what some random fat romanian guy thinks, but its like he's saying what everyone else is too nice to say, ya know? Anyone else go through this? It makes me want to gie up and just take my place with the rest of the "Chubby" girls...
Awww I'm so sorry, but I would go in a cry as well, you aren't alone. It doesn't help that TV gives a false idea of what "REAL" people look like. Seriously! You just want to shake them until they REALIZE it's all just smoke and mirrors! It's almost as bad as all the air brushed magazine covers!
Don't give up at all! I would KILL (or at the very least seriously harm) to be at the weight you are right now!! Chin up and hang in there
Men from different cultures can be very forthcoming. They are quite shallow and sexist in places, they believe women should be a certain way for them to oogle at. So I really wouldn't worry about what they think - because they were being shallow!! I know it's hurtful, and I would be very hurt too, but you're doing something about your weight so let that be your strength.
I remember when I was in Spain random strangers would yell "WHITEY WHITEY!" at us in Spanish because we looked so pale! It's like "Gawd, why do you need to say that to me we don't even know you!!" Luckily our Spanish friend who we were staying with would yell all sorts of insults at them for us, so justice was served.
But please remember - it's not about what others think it's about what YOU feel. Not everyone is going to look at you and think you look awesome, but who cares what they think? Life is about YOU and your actions and emotions. Don't let anyone else influence the way you feel about yourself, and furthermore, don't label yourself! You know what you want to be so keep going and ignore what everyone says! Do this is for you and only you.
I'm very sorry that this guy's words hurt you, but this sounds like it's a case for eye-rolling and pity. This guy doesn't know that movies and tv aren't "real"? That's pretty sad for a grown man.
Honestly, you're not ever gonna win no matter where you live. One person might think you're chubby. Another might think you're too thin. Another might think you could be taller. Another might think you should be shorter. You know the saying. Opinions are like a**h****, everybody's got one. That doesn't change no matter what country we're in.
I just recently had a stranger comment on my weight...something about fat people...and it really messed with my head.
It made me think how hard I've worked to get where I am and how it just isn't enough. But, I *know* this is a good weight for me because of my body type. I'm glad I found this thread! Makes me feel better. I still have to learn to accept my body for what it is, and celebrate what it took to get here. I am fit, I am healthy, and I am strong!
Psh, that girl has no muscles either, I could kick her ***.
Screw those men and their unrealistic expectations. You're doing wonderfully- I would kill to have your height and weight!!
People are awful! Sorry it happened to you but who cares what random strangers are saying. They sound pretty ignorant. Hold your head high and keep going!
I bet they were ugly and clearly uneducated if they are basing american woman off of tv shows. NO ONE looks like the girls off of TV and they clearly haven't scene Jersey Shore by the sounds of that comment because Snooki looks nothing like the typical american "looking" girls either even though I think she's...I have no clue I don't watch that stupid show. But point is no one looks like TV american girls, well some do but majority of real people and not fake wannabe plastic barbie looking chicks, looks like TV show girls. So screw them, but I bet you felt good after a good cry! I know I would have.
Don't forget what you've accomplished! a 30 pound weight loss! Like come on you have that to be excited about not what some ugly, uneducated douchebag has to say!
You are doing so well! Absolutely do not let this get you down to the point where you want to give up. I think many of us have experienced situations like this and it is absolutely awful. I really struggled when I lived abroad as well as I think I "confirmed" some stereotypes for some people and other cultures can be a lot more upfront about weight issues than here in the US. I just reminded myself that I was proud I was doing something about it and that is exactly what you should do.
But please remember - it's not about what others think it's about what YOU feel. Not everyone is going to look at you and think you look awesome, but who cares what they think? Life is about YOU and your actions and emotions. Don't let anyone else influence the way you feel about yourself, and furthermore, don't label yourself! You know what you want to be so keep going and ignore what everyone says! Do this is for you and only you.
No offense but if he is overweight than he has no room to talk. That's the double standard that many people have--it's 'ok' for men to be overweight, but 'not ok' for women to be overweight. Its 'not ok' for anyone to be overweight, from a health standpoint, but it doesn't make you any less of a man or woman. It make him less of a man to have such twisted views. I wonder if he thinks in his current shape a girl that he thinks is 'thin enough' would even look twice at him!
Dont let those idiots get to you.. Every man/woman has there ideal body shape/type would be, even when you get to be where you want to be someone will have an opinion. some people just speak out of there butt and dont consider peoples feelings. Theres a difference on being blunt and truthful, and plain rude. Girls on tv? those girls are self conscious just like the rest of us.
what jerks. remember its what you think of yourself, not what others thing.
I remember in high school i was at my highest weight and we had two foreign exchange students and I was put in charge of showing them around. Well he just came out and said "I hope not all American girls are a big as you." I was so insulted.
But i used it as motivation to stay on my diet, and I was down almost 30pounds by graduation and down 50 by the time summer was over.
And you ARE doing great! Your down 34 pounds and don't let fat guys who don't know you make you feel like this!
Thank you all for the kind words! I know I shouldnt let it get to me, but Im only human and thin skinned at times. Im still at it and I just go by what the only opinion i need from a guy, which is my fiance telling me Im beautiful and that he can definately tell Ive lost weight...I love this forum!
You are chubby, you know it (that's why you're here, right?), and you're doing something about it. That's all you can do. Other people know it too, but how they interpret your chubbiness is out of your control and is a reflection of their thinking patterns, experiences, and prejudices. Besides, other people's perceptions of you are probably more varied than you think. They might all think you're chubby, but then again, some people really can't "see" weight, and a lot of people are probably capable of recognizing weight as simply a single facet of a person's being. You wouldn't take a crude conversation between two fat, shallow handymen in the US as the gospel-truth about how everybody in the US views you, would you? Why should their Romanian equivalents have any more weight? You know that people are more varied than that. Judging real people against images designed to be attractive, using a subjective interpretation of the appearance of two real people to judge millions of real people, and possibly indulging in the use of a double-standard or hypocrisy suggest that this dude probably hasn't really developed his mental or emotional abilities. That's not your problem, and really - is that the sort of person you feel the need to impress?
Sometimes people seem to have unrealistic expectations of foreigners (or any other "other"), whether they're receiving visitors in their own country or traveling abroad. I think there can be a tendency to try to fit real, complex, imperfect human beings into whatever ideas a person has about a foreigner's country. I don't know what Romania's like, but many of the citizens of other Anglophone countries and Western European nations (although certainly not all, and undoubtedly nobody on 3FC) who I've met think they know much, much more about the US and Americans ('cause we're all the same) than they actually do. I think there are several reasons for this, but one is (IMO) the strange yet pervasive belief that US-produced movies and television are accurate and complete portrayals of American life (rather than stories intended to entertain, make money for networks and advertisers, promote particular political and social opinions, and occasionally even to educate viewers). It can be difficult to get past that sort of illogic with some people, both abroad and at home. I sometimes get crud from people when I go outside the South, because as soon as I say where I'm from they superimpose the (usually negative) stereotypes, vague impressions, and the worst aspects of the state and region's past and present that they've absorbed onto me. "Yankees" often seem to get crud when they come here, and for similar reasons.
You be the best you you can be. If anybody - of any nationality - bases his/her opinion of you and/or an entire group of which you happen to be a member on something as changeable as weight or appearance, the problem is with that person, not you.
The "chubby" american girl
You know the saying. Opinions are like a**h****, everybody's got one. That doesn't change no matter what country we're in.
and clearly uneducated if they are basing american woman off of tv shows. NO ONE looks like the girls off of TV and they clearly haven't scene Jersey Shore by the sounds of that comment because Snooki looks nothing like the typical american "looking" girls either even though I think she's...I have no clue I don't watch that stupid show. But point is no one looks like TV american girls, well some do but majority of real people and not fake wannabe plastic barbie looking chicks, looks like TV show girls. So screw them, but I bet you felt good after a good cry! I know I would have. 
