You asked what we do; I fret
The Mayo clinic calculator tells me that I need about 1700 calories, so I cut down to 1500, believing that cutting by 500 a day would be too extreme. I have been eating at that for a while, but, I am now stuck. I have for the past two weeks tried eating more calories on lifting days, and fewer on rest days.
I started HIIT and steady state cardio about three weeks ago and am now in a period of getting more rest because I overtrained. All that got me was fatigue.
I am confident that eating as clean as possible is going to do the trick, eventually. I use the fitday website and log my intake daily. I look at my nutrition carefully and am trying to find what will work for me. Others have found their groove; I'm sure I'll find mine.
My new lifting program started this past January and over the last month I have noticed a
real change in the way my body looks. My waist seems to be there again, my legs and butt have lost fat, and I swear I can see some abs under the belly fat.
Good luck to you, and I'm curious to read what the others say. There are people here who have lost a lot of weight.