Here's my story...
I've been surfing around the boards for a while now, so I decided to join up & post my story.
I'm now 20 years old, and i've been horribly overweight since I was a young kid.
I've struggled with this my entire life. At age 12 I developed bulemia, after years
and years of being tormented about my looks and my weight, and struggling with having friends and even just talking to people.
During this time I dropped down to 115 pounds at 5'8" tall,
and wore a size 4/5 jean. I was still disgusted with my looks and was constantly
depressed and still could not trust anyone enough to talk to them about any of my problems. I finally got the bulemia under control at age 16, and at this time
I also started birth colrtol medication.
By the time I graduated high school at age 17, I weighed almost 200 pounds and
was absolutely disgusted by my looks and couldn't even stand the sight of myself in a mirror.
I started excersing regularly and ate a lot better, and by the time I was almost 19 I had
dropped down to 150 pounds... But I noticed when I would eat certain things that had any
fat in them at all, I would get very sick. I took this (at first, this started when I was 18)
as a "blessing" and altred my diet. Which helped for a while, but then I would have to keep
cutting out food about every 3 months or so, and by January 2010 I had been getting a
pain in my upper right side.. At 19 I finally went to a doctor in March and told them what
had been happening (I never mentioned anything about my eating disorder) so they sent me for an
ultra sound. When the results came back they found out I had Galstones. The pain continued to
get worse, and in the end 5 weeks before my surgery I couldn't keep any food down for more
than about 3 minutes. and at this time I had dropped down to 135 pounds, and I wore a size 9-11 jeans.
I had my surgery in May 2010, and was down for 3 weeks to recover. After I started to eat
regularly again, I put on 5 pounds and maintained the wight until September 2010, and
I dont know how drasticly my eating habits had changed (I know I wasn't eating great anymore)
But since September I have put on almost 35 pounds, out grown every single pair of jeans and
every shirt I own.
I'm honestly so depressed and I hate the way I look now, I can't even stand the thought of my
fiancee touching me, and I don't even want to plan my wedding because if I look like this
I don't even want to have one.
I've been watching what I eat and I have been going to the gym 3 times a week for about a month,
and I haven't lost a pound.
I don't know what I am going to do anymore.. and the more I think about it, the more down I keep
getting.
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