[CheekyChicky]

Hi,
I'm Cheeky. I just turned 25 and I have issues with weight, food, self-esteem etc. I know that my problems aren't "curable," but for my health I MUST learn to manage them. This fat girl thing just isn't working for me, but you'd never know that because I keep doin' it!

I've been heavy all of my life. I was even a large baby leaving stretch marks and saddlebags in my wake (poor mom). I don't know how to be anything other than fat, because I've always had my weight to hide behind. I've given several weight loss "plans" and diets a try. I think I've been dieting since I was around 9. I don't know what a normal, balanced meal looks like. I've only ever had excess or deprivation.

I don't know where to start, I suck at personal accountability and I'm afraid--absolutely terrified. I'm afraid to fail and afraid not to try. I don't even know where to start, but I am planning to find out starting now.

[Lauren201]

Hi Cheeky! Welcome!

The very first thing I did when I started my weight loss plan was to give up soda and start eating more veggies. I think when you're trying to change your life and start a new path it's best to take small steps at first.

Good luck!

[Nola Celeste]

Welcome, Cheeky (I love your user name)!

You've already made a really good move in signing up here. I completely empathize with you on the "feast or famine" thing, but in my couple of months here, I've finally learned how to do this and make it stick.

If it helps to know, where I started was in my own head. I had to stop looking at what I ate as a punishment for being fat, going on restrictive and unsustainable diets because I felt that's what I "deserved" to suffer for allowing myself to get big. I had to learn to set goals based not on results that I couldn't control, but on behaviors that I could; I might not lose two pounds a week every week, but that's no longer a goal of mine.

Do you have a particular plan in mind (Weight Watchers, Atkins, calorie-counting, etc.)? There are so many good sources of information here on these forums and so many people who can help you with the finer points of whichever road you want to take (including if you want to forge your own).

I wish you the best of luck and look forward to reading more from you!

[woodgal1]

Well now that you've gotten all your excuses out of the way, maybe it's time to get serious about what you CAN do.
Look at what you are eating.
Cut the crappola.
You obviously are not without smarts. You've come here.
Now it's up to you to take what is offered and put it into motion.
It will not happen overnight.
But it can happen.

I struggle.
But I do not focus on what I weigh.
I focus on doing the best I can for myself every day.
Every single thing that is put in front of me, by me... or someone else... or God...is up for grabs.
Whether I grab it or not, that IS totally up to me.
Use your head. Not your self medicating behavior.

You are NOT the reason for any stretch marks. That was your mammys choice. And the fact that you have been over weight since birth is not all your doing. There came a time when YOU were responsible for your choices, before that you were conditioned to eating what was given you.
You just never grew up enough to make smarter choices. Start now.
Better late than never.
You can research why you have not taken the reigns. You can find out if you have an Insulin Resistance problem, or a thyroid problem, or a get cher butt up and move problem....by using the same tool that got you here...your PC.
You have strength you never knew you had, and we will help you get in touch with it. We will help you move forward. But you will have to do the hard stuff. And you will have to stick with it.
Now how bad do you want it?

Lauren is right, take a step. Even a baby step. Then another....
Hugs to you OOOOOOOOOOO