Is there a weight that you've reached as you were shrinking that was really, really uncomfortable for some reason? For me it's the 270 mark.
I reached 272 about four years ago and simply quit trying and regained it all and then some. I've felt myself being "weird" (for lack of a better word) at this weight again. I've bordered on panic attacks in public. There have been tears, snot, and pointless rounds of self-loathing...all over NOTHING.
There has to be something psychological about this weight. There's no way around it. I've caught myself wanting to over-eat. Negativity and self-defeating thoughts have amplified. I actually considered quitting again, but kicked my own butt and continued. I just don't know what it is.
Anyone else? If so and you continued to shrink, were you okay in 10-15 lbs, or was it something nagging that stuck with you?
Last edited by AZ Sunrises; 10-17-2010 at 08:05 PM.
it sounds like you have some internal conflict going on.
i think you need to explore that. is there something you fear? it may be unconscious.
for me there was a real wall of 200. self sabotage for sure when i lost to get close to it, and right back up.
now i'm at my lowest wt in several years. i guess 6 yrs. even then it was only for a short period. i had gained alot for the first pregnancy, then lost i guess 30#. then later had 2 more kids. was never under 200 again. try listening to IOWL podcast, it's free. renee addresses this and many other topics. i really love her soothing, comforting voice. she understands that whatever our size, we have the same mental struggles for the most part.
i think you will need to identify what your internal struggle is, deal with it, before you can move on. in that time, it's a good idea to just try to maintain. just concentrate on the mental hw. this really helped me alot. i hope it helps you too.
you may also need professional therapy, but this is a good first step. let us know how it goes
I hit a physical and mental/emotional wall at 150lbs. I plateaued for about a month after losing 1.5+lbs every single week for several months. Suddenly "watching what I ate" and exercising when I felt like it wasn't good enough to keep losing. I had to buckle down and calorie count and also start a real exercise routine. 150lbs was also the lowest I had been since 5th grade. When I started at 180+, 150lbs seemed like the unattainable ideal. It seemed so low and so far away. Well when I was stuck at 150, that number that I had so coveted, I still felt big and awkward and overweight. So I was left with these emotions of frustration of being at a plateau, disappointment that my original goal wasn't good enough, and wondering if I'd ever be able to get the scale to move to where I wanted it to be, if I'd ever be satisfied.
It is so good to read your post AZ sunrises. I was just thinking I need to get back on plan. I have been off for about a week. It always seems just as I am approaching my size 10s I get off plan and gain 5 pounds or more and am comfortably back in my 12s. I don't know what it is. Maybe I've been a 12 for so long since having my kids (I was an 8 (occasionally a 6) before my 1st son and a 10 before my 2nd son). I'm just comfortable there, not sure. I do know it's hard to lose weight so maybe I am pushing to hard and I just take a break or give up each time I get there. Not sure, but I agree something internally is going on, some kind of conflict within ourselves. Sorry, I'm not much help. It was nice to read your post because I am going through that right now myself.
The 240s were tough for me. I think I just expected to feel so much smaller once I got below 250. I'd hyped them up too much and was left dissapointed. And to make me hate them even more, I've had the hardest damn time staying in the 230s, so I re-visited 240 often.
A male friend (a fat admirer) and I were chatting...and what he said was spot-on. In his words "You're going to be datable again soon." Where I am right now is at a societal wall. Because of the way my weight is distributed, I'm *almost* to the point where I'm visible to men who aren't exclusively into big girls. I told him I thought I had 30 more lbs and he told me to look in a mirror. Crap.
Yep. I'm currently at "that weight" that I keep getting stuck at. The low 150s. It seems like I have some mental block that makes the 140's impossible to get through!
maybe you are scared of succeeding? or making your goal and gaining it back? For me it's the 160s-150s...I guess because it's so close to goal (20 pounds is close to goal to me )
and as AZ Sunrises mentioned, it would mean I would be datable again (or the confidence to get out there atleast) and no more excuses, not only in dating but all other areas of my life. Usually I'll say I don't want to do something because of my weight or I'll turn down going out with guys and blame it being self conscious because of my weight and not fitting in my clothes.
I guess for me once the weight is off I know I can't hide behind it anymore, there will be no more excuses not to do anything in life.
Last edited by ringmaster; 10-18-2010 at 02:33 AM.
I feel that your "fat suit" is some sort of protection against the outside world. Getting hurt emotionally and taking risks is scary. You concede that you are almost dateable which can be scary for those that don't want to be hurt. And it's understandable. I agree with Katy, IOWL is awesome for working through these types of issues. Give it a try. My scary weight was around 155-160. I was panicked! But I was able to work through it and calm myself down.
210. Maybe 209. That was were I would get to, think "Oh, I will never be able to get below 200" and quit and go eat oreos and pretzels with cheese dip. Then I would hit 220 or so and think "Crap! I can't gain all my weight back." and lose again. Rinse. Repeat.
I would like to say, I have an answer for you... but I am still working things out. I do find that the longer I see "single digits" on the scale, the easier it gets to not panic and go eat something.
The 170s seem impossible. I am at 177 today and I haven't seen this weight in years. I touched 178, 179, but never below. It just seems impossible to get out of them, into the low 170s.
I'm hoping that now that I have a better hold of what works for me, that I can pass this and actually get down to a weight I haven't seen since I was a freshman in college.
I always make it to the low 240's, once or twice slightly below 240 and that's where it stops. I don't know why. It doesn't matter if I had to fight to get that low or if I was just really on point and got there. I've gotten there, sometimes I've stayed there a short while, but more often then not I've gone right back up 5 to 10 lbs. Maybe there is a subconscious thing going on.
I had two, the 190s and the 160s. When I got down to the 190s I felt terrible. It was like I went from being a small big person to being a big small person. I felt so gross. After I lost a few more pounds I started feeling okay again, but then I hit 169. I was only 19 pounds away from my original goal and it scared the heck out of me. I think I was just afraid of being thin. That was when I went off plan and started gaining again. It's hard to believe now that I was sooooo close and then just sabotaged myself.
I would have to say mine is right now in the 260's. I started losing weight when I had just had my youngest daughter and topped the scale at 295 after delivering here. I did not want to see that 300, so I started changing how I ate and lost 35 lbs to 260, then my husband was laid off.
I started taking on more work to make the bills and he was so down from being laid off after 10 years with the company that we would eat comfort food together and I gained back twenty of the lbs. He is still out of work, but we are both working on getting healthy. My stress levels are much better when I eat healthy foods and the lbs have been coming off again, but I have still been stuck in the 260's for the past 8 weeks. I keep bouncing between 267 and 264.
Luckily, this week it is that TOM and I usually gain 5-7lbs water weight. I got on the scale this morning and only weighed 260.8lbs, so I only have a little bit to go to finally get under the 260 mark which I have not seen in 5 years. My goal for 2010 is to get under 250 for the holidays. I think once I can get in the 250's I will be on track to losing those last 10 lbs for my 2010 goal by the end of December.
I don't know what it is about the 260's that has me stuck, my 24's are too big and the 22's give me a muffin top. I so just want to fit comfortably in my clothing. Being uncomfortable makes me more self conscious about my weight.
174. I couldn't break that number for the life of me. Like a lot of people said, it was so great to see it when I first got there, but then it became this evil number that wouldn't move!
I can't be the only one...
