I have had a bad habit of eating healthy foods in normal portion sizes all day long and then eating the same number of calories in un-healthy food between supper and bedtime for years. I started my journey again 6 weeks ago and did well keeping it under control the first 4 weeks. I work 3pm-11:30pm, and the nights I work are the worst. I tell myself it's my way of relaxing. I am never hungry when I do it. And now that I controlled it for four weeks I know I can control it. What is bothering me is that I started doing it again after I lost my biggest amount yet in one week. The only difference is that I'm overeating on healthier choices so the calories/fat are not as many but I'm still eating at night, when I'm not even hungry. It would be nice to find a group of people to talk with at night when I am struggling.
Why am I sabotaging myself?
Have any of you struggled to control the same habit? If so how have you succeeded?
If there is anyone who is awake and active on the message boards between 12am-2am and struggles with the same thing we should start an active thread?!
Hi goodnuff,
I have the same problem and although many people say not to eat anything after 5 or 6pm, I found when I ate dinner too early is when I had the hardest time. I try to eat no earlier then 6pm and the rest of the evening drink alot of water (yes I do tend to get up in the middle of the night to tinkle). If I'm having a hard time with the munchies I try to eat a piece of fruit. I don't really keep any junk in the house at all, out of sight out of mind.
I'm not always up that late, but if I have a sleepless night I'll look for you on here. Hang in there, your doing a fantastic job with your weight loss.
This used to be a bad habit of mine.
I now:
a) Always have a "dessert" planned for after-dinner. Even if just a low-fat yogurt or a bit of fruit. This way I get to end my eating day with a sweet note and I don't feel deprived.
b) After about 20-30 minutes after that, I brush my teeth and use a mouthwash. No sooner as it's bad for you teeth to brush straight after eating, but no later. It makes me feel like the day is done, and eating after brushing your teeth is gross.
c) I go lie down with my iPod and listen to music or a podcast or watch a movie. 9 times out of 10 I'll go to sleep, even though I consider myself a serious night owl. Can't eat when you're asleep.
d) IF I feel hungry I drink water or have a peppermint tea. Not once have I had to eat after reaching this step since I quit being a night-time snacker.
well, I had a bit of a different version, I would eat great all day, go to bed, wake up around 2 or 3 in the morning..stuff my face with crap and then go back to bed. This went on for years...peanut butter was my favorite, I would just eat it out of the jar. It drove me nuts, I didn't want to do it, but yet I couldn't stop.
When I started on my journey back on Dec. 14th, I just quit doing it, just like that and a few months ago I had wondered, why? What had it been giving me and why didn't I need it now?
What I discovered was so much of my life was about everyone else..my husband, my kids, my family, my friends..I didn't take time for me. And getting up in the middle of the night and stuffing my face...it was only about me. No one asking me for anything, no one watching over me, no one I had to share with. In a weird way, it had become my moment of independence for the day.
I still have that now, just in a different fashion. We have a rule in my house now..when Mom puts on her headphones, it's her time. And I put my headphones on when I work out. The only exception to the rule is if someone is dying..that's it..otherwise I get left alone.
I needed just to be Faith, not Pablo's wife, not April, Brittany or Estevan's mom. I needed a part of my life back I had lost.
Did it fix me? It sure did. Do I miss it? Not at all.
You have to find out what the core of the issue is and then address that.
Sounds like you may be trying to live a 9 to 5 life on a 3 to 11 shift.
You make your life to fit you, no one else.
Adjust what you do and how you eat to fit your lifestyle, not what the world considers the "norm".
I would be curious to know what time you are eating your last meal as well...perhaps it is early which is putting you into a snacking mood?
I feel your pain though. I work midnights 630pm to 700am. Ugh. It is all I can do not to stuff my face when I get home. It seems that I am always hungry on this shift.
I am occasionally on the boards at night if it is really slow at work, so I will keep an eye out if you post!
Good advice, thanks.
I did it again last night. I'm embarrassed to say that I made pasta and fish for dinner. I made the whole 7 serving box and between dinner and bed I ate all 7 servings by myself. With butter and Parmesan cheese. I am so frustrated right now. I wasn't hungry. I shouldn't have been bored. I was watching a movie and relaxing for the first time in weeks. Like I said, I've been doing this for years. The only difference is that now I feel frustrated because I want to stop whereas before I couldn't have cared less. On the upside it was Smart Taste pasta and Smart Balance olive oil margarine. But I know it was still a bad idea. I had double my allowed points for the day.
I know I tell myself it's my way of relaxing but it is no longer relaxing. Like sweetcakes, it has been my time of the day when no one can bother me. I will try to have my last meal later whether I am working or off and will try just going to my room and reading when I start to think about eating when I should be done for the day. I will keep posting and will use your ideas to help. Thank you.
Question goodnuff, if you don't mind me asking and it's not too personal...why do you think it is that you "reward" yourself with food and not something else? What does the food give you?
My answer was...I loved food because it didn't talk back, it didn't pass judgement, it was silent, and it was the only thing at the time I felt I was in control of. I needed that because so many areas of my life were out of control or so I thought.
Last edited by sweetcakes736; 07-05-2010 at 03:02 PM.
Sweetcakes: Pretty much nothing is off limits to ask me, I'm as open as a book with a worn down spine ;-) As a child my mom was radical about food. One day we ate "normal", the next we weren't allowed any sugar or white bread, a week later we were binging on pails of icecream and jars of hot fudge. She gave us diet pills when we were in middle school and she was extremely supportive when during highschool I limited myself to 1000 calories and exercised 2-4 hours every day. Then I was married to a man who worshipped the ground I walked on, until I got pregnant and gained 85 pounds. After that he would grab the chub on my thighs and shake it under the table when I reached for seconds. He cheated on me, "because I let myself go". I got into the mindset after my divorce, that only I control when, where and what I eat, no one will ever again tell me what I can and can not eat. Some women would have starved themselves, I overeat. I have worked through my mother issues, as much as I can. I know she didn't do it to hurt me. She didn't want me to go through what she did by being overweight. "Talking" this through made me realize that I have been binging every night since I found out my ex-husband was cheating on his second wife for the past year. I knew it opened up an old (it's been 15 years) wound for me but maybe more than I thought. Hmm?
Wow, ok I guess the best place to start is the beginning. Was your mom overweight, underweight, or normal? did she ever have any signs of an eating disorder? I have to admit allowing you to take diet pills in middle school made my jaw drop to the floor, as a mother of two teenage daughters and a woman who has struggled with my weight most of my life, reading that broke my heart. It sounds like she had issues herself and passed them to you. Sometimes parents live through their children and that comes in many forms, sports, academics and even weight. What she couldn't fix in herself she'd fix in you. If that's the case, THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!!!!
The ex thing really struck a chord with me because baby, that's abusive!! Are you serious? He would grab your chub and try to demean and guilt you into doing what he wanted? I'm sorry I didn't realize you were married to Mr. Universe because I'm assuming by his behavior he was perfect with no flaws or faults at all. He cheated on you because he is a shallow, insecure pig who didn't have enough balls to address his own issues, instead it was easier to pawn it off on you. You left yourself go my butt, you are as beautiful at this very moment as you were the day he married you, and though I know it's been said before, it wasn't you, it was him.
Men, real men, don't behave that way. Boys trapped in a man's body behave that way. A man loves a woman for who she is because he sees her for everything she is, not just what she looks like. He cheated on his second wife too, did she also "let herself go"? I have one, maybe it's him. Seems like he marries amazing women and then grinds them into the ground. As I get older, I'm starting to believe that when men worship the ground his lady walks on, he's not what he appears to be. I've been married for 19 years, actually in a few days, we'll be together 20. And though I've loved him for every minute of it, I haven't always liked him and in fact, sometimes he just drives me crazy!! It's not that I'd ever hurt him, but I had a power to make him loose his voice for a few hours I would because sometimes men just don't get it.
He used guilt and shame to manipulate your love and emotions, now maybe it's time you claim your life back. Fifteen years has been long enough. Now it's time for you.
Post when you can.
All my love,
Faith
Last edited by sweetcakes736; 07-06-2010 at 12:02 AM.
Apparently my mom was overweight (5'2'', 185 lbs) at some point in her life, but not when I remember her though. She was always doing drastic diets when i was younger and she still struggles to accept herself now at 110 lbs. Her issues when she was a child were having an alcoholic father who spent grocery money on boozed and every once in awhile he'd be sober enough on payday and they would fill carts and carts up with food and would basically binge, not knowing when they would have food again. I think I have come to terms with her as much as I can. I know food/weight will always be an issue for both of us, separately and when we are together.
I believe there are men out there that are like you say,I have not met any...yet! I think I put a "don't talk to me" aura out there because I don't even get approached. I'm 37 now and to me it seems like an awkward age to start a relationship. Still technically young enough to have kids but not really interested in that. Also not real gung-ho on dealing with ex-wife/baby's mama drama either. But almost too young to date men who have adult children. If it's meant to be it will happen right?
I did not eat after supper last night. Still managed to overeat for the day, but overall it was a better day. So far today is great.
Sweetcakes, you seem to have a sane handle on marriage. From my observation point it's not all good or all bad. There are ups and downs, and for most couples it's not about something as vain as weight. I work with all women...literally. I am a labor and delivery nurse. So I get to see and hear about relationships all of the time. There are very few that make me feel like I'm missing out on anything but deep down I know that I am. Until it finds me, I think I would be wise to take care of me, figure out and fix my own issues and start participating in my own life.
Thanks,
M
Ugh, I did it again but this time I'm really paying the price. I had a smoothie and oatmeal with toasted rye flakes for breakfast, a slice of pizza and a large salad for lunch and then I stopped at the store after work to get almond milk for todays smoothie. Not hungry, of course. But I bought 3 frozen burritos, 2 apple turnovers and a bad of sour cream and onion chex mix. I didn't like the chex mix so I just threw it away..it's garbage anyway right? But I ate everything else then promptly went to bed at 2am so that i could wake up at 8 for my WW meeting. I woke up at 5 with the worst belly pains outside of labor ever. I've convinced myself that the burritos are trying to fight there way out but the fiber from breakfast was putting up a stop sign. It's now 2:40 and my stomach does not feel any better, I called in sick because I can not even stand up straight or reposition without stabbing pains going through my entire gut. I've never had to call in because of my bad eating before, how embarrassing.
I have 4 points (WW) left. I just got home from work and I am trying to not eat after work. I am not hungry but I want to eat. I know if I try to eat just 4 points it will turn into 14 or 40. So i'm going to go to bed, hope I fall asleep soon and wake when it's light out so I can start a whole new day of eating
I know what you mean. I have supper and right after supper I could eat an extra large bag of chips, a chocolate bar, and a bowl of ice cream and have room for more. I'm not hungry I am bored and I like the feeling of the taste in my mouth. I have two things that are starting to work for me. Plan a healthy snack for night time, I like a cracker and laughing cow cheese. Also I have gotten back into cross stitching. It takes the boredom away and I get something beautiful in the end. You can't eat and cross stitch...
After Hours Overeater
