New to 3FC, I am in need of lots of help , so far what I have read seem very helpfull , I am full of crap my head is a mess I don't know what is realistic and what is not. Sorry for this pathetic introduction, I will tell you more about myself little by little, I am having a difficult morning, my husband is doing great with his change of lifestyle and I suck!!! that was the trigger. The last thing I need is my husband being lighter than me!!! anyway happy to be here.
It's always tough when you try so hard and someone breezes by making it look easy. But remember, this isn't a race; you should be working together helping each other not competing. Just stick to your plan, keep eating healthy and you'll get there!
I know it's not how we're usually taught to think and feel about weight loss and a healthy lifestyle, but I'd encourage you to think of it as a way to take care of, and even pamper the wonderful person you already are - not as a way to punish yourself for not being the you, you'd like to be.
For decades I tried to hate myself thin, even though I was never very good at hating myself for very long, but I thought that's how it was "supposed" to be done. It never worked very well, because when I could manage to hate myself like I thought I was supposed to, I didn't feel confident in my ability to succeed, so I saw every less-than-perfect action as an unforgiveable crime and proof I was destined to failure. And then, when I got tired of punishing myself and couldn't muster any hate for myself, I felt like I "deserved" to splurge (on food) to reward myself for all the punishment I endured.
It's hard to help people we don't like and respect. The resentment gets in the way, and I think that's true for helping ourselves also. How can you feel that you CAN change when you think you're weak and pathetic (not trying to put words in your mouth, these were just thoughts in my head and I've heard them from others too)?
Did you ever wish you could go to one of those luxurious (and crazy expensive) health and fitness spas and resorts? That has always been my dream. One of the ways "this time" has been different for me, is that I try to create the spa atmosphere for myself at home. Even little indulgences can mean so much - and I don't mean indulgences of food I shouldn't be eating, but indulgences that are entirely good for me (like the spa treatment would be). For example, one of my favorite things is to try new and exotic food, to translate that into "health spa" thinking, I started shopping in oriental and ethnic markets or even in the grocery store - to try fruits and vegetables I've never tried before.
Today I've got an "indulgence" planned. The farmers' market has opened, and I see that they're supposed to have pea tendrils (these are the tender shoots and leaves of the snow pea or snap pea plants before they develop any peas on them. They're great in a stir fry or in a salad). The rhubarb is out too, and I love rhubarb.
You can beat yourself thinner, or you can treat yourself thinner.
Thanks, I am sorry about my introduction guys, the truth is that I been fighting with myself for so many years to get thinner with no results.
Few years ago I started running and I did good to the point of running 5 miles every day in 50 min, I was pushing myself really hard and my goal was to run a marathon not even losing weight even when the over weight thing has always been in my mind.
Now days I am not doing nothing I haven't gain any weight but I am not fit, my clothes fit but not like before. Some of the anger I have is due to the fact that AT that point of my life when I was running i didn't feel happy because the scale was showing me the same numbers so now I think is pointless to do something at all .
I am confused just like losing weight is like science , exercise is too + the lack of will + body image issues + self esteem. All i want is to get things straight , find a routine , love myself, be healthier, be happier and lose those
freaking 10-15 pounds.
On top of that I am dealing with anxiety and depression that came after burning myself out with all that running to achieve my goal which never happened ( never run the marathon) i did small races but never the big " o ", the desire still there but that's it.
bitter newbe
The last thing I need is my husband being lighter than me!!!
Dhani 
