My husband said something very similar (including the confusion over what he's supposed to "do" to support me). I told him it's not his responsibility to keep me on plan, or even to keep track of whether or not I'm on plan, so if I need something from him, I will ask.
He doesn't need me critiquing and controlling his eating habits, and I don't need him to do that for me, either. Splurging once in a while with a deliberate treat meal (which helps me stay on plan in the long run) can look a lot like an off-plan, caution-to-the-wind, off-my-diet meal. If it's a deliberate splurge and hubby makes commentary of the "should you be eating that" variety, I can misinterpret his "help" as nagging and controlling behavior.
The same is true if I notice hubby eating more carbs than he is "supposed to be" (he's diabetic). I do (by virtue of mutural agreement) remind him if I see him eating out of the box, that he asked me to remind him to measure out a portion into a bowl.
We've promised each other that we will try not to assume what the other needs, we will ask for help in a specific format.
For example, the "no eating from the box rule, applies to both of us.
Hubby doesn't have a problem controlling portions with some high carb foods that I do - so those foods are kept on the top shelf of the pantry inside a large soup pot (out of my sight and reach, at my request). If I ask for a piece, hubby is to get it for me - but only the one piece that I asked for and then he returns it to the "hiding" spot.
He also has permission to remind me that a food is likely to contain wheat (I'm still new to avoiding wheat and I sometimes forget the obvious. I ordered a noodle dish without thinking. Hubby thought I was intentionally choosing it, and I just forgot. Luckily, it turned out they were rice noodles).
|
It's nice that he's showing you how proud he is.
