Hello everyone
I just wanted to start off my introduction by saying that this is my first ever post or thread on any forum and that I am very excited to join. Now that the awkward part is over... My name is Amanda, I am 19 years old, 5 feet 8 inches tall, 228 pounds and categorized as being severely obese with a BMI of 34.7
My whole life I have felt fat. My father has been telling me that i'm fat since I was 8 years old. At the age of 10 I became severely depressed and started taking my step-mother's diet pills so that I might be loved by my father as much as my skinny sister was. By the age of 14 I became suicidal and started writing horrible things in my diary along with upsetting drawings of death. And by the age of 16 I became both bulimic and anorexic (not at the same time obviously). I stopped both of these idiotic things at the age of 17. My father still doesn't take any blame or admit that he had anything to do with my feeling of obesity or even depression. It doesn't give me pleasure to say these things, just relief to be able to tell someone because I've been keeping it in all along. I see now, however, that there have been a couple of times when I was actually skinny but thought of myself as fat and unattractive. I am happy to say, however, that I moved out of my father's house a couple weeks after my 18th birthday. My life has been hard to say the least, but I won't bore you all with the rest of the tragedies unless otherwise asked, for it would be a great relief to find a friend somewhere who will try to understand.
Now for the weight loss part...
I now realize that I actually am very overweight and I want to shed the pounds for my own personal happiness. I'm aiming for 160 pounds, maybe 150. I don't care how long it takes as long as I am at a healthy weight
I actually just ordered Alli and am going to use it for the first month along with diet and exercise to kick-start my weight loss journey. After that it will most likely be hard work because I understand that I can't get to my goal using the pills as a crutch.
feel free to reply, chances are that I'll need as much help as I can get
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