The last few weeks I have been eating like a mad woman. On the worst day, I ate a whole pizza and a big bag of candy washed down with a bottle of wine. So it was very bad and I thought to myself that maybe I am physically incapable of stopping my binges. I have every reason in the world to stop plus I have support from the people in my life. Yet still, I was stuffing myself.
I went to a weight loss surgery seminar and, of course, they made it seem appealing. Remove part of your stomach and have no more crushing hunger and watch the weight just fall off. You've tried your best to diet and are simply unable to do it like 98% of the people who try. However, I keep asking myself do you really want to have part of your stomach removed? The answer is yes if I cannot stop bingeing on my own but I tell myself that once upon a time I lost 60 pounds and tamed the binge monster for a while. My poor coping skills and comfort eating led to a regain of 30.
I would very much appreciate advice on whether you all think that is possible for a binge eater to change. I have been relying on food for 30 years and know that I need to learn new patterns even if I have WLS.
I recently discovered this raw foodist guy on Youtube and as you probably know seeing me around I am part raw foodist. Anyhow, as i watched one of this videos he talked about his weight loss and his binges and the thing that struck out to me and this guy is ripped now, totally thin (took him 10 years to get to where he is today spiritually and physically), etc "my binges are LEGENDARY, if you think you've gone and binged, whoa man, mine have been amazing." I too used to binge and the last time I did eat something that was "bingelike" I ate a whole strawberry shortcake by myself, that was last year.
The point I'm trying to make is that one day in the future you WILL be able to look back and say "oh man, I used to eat a whole pizza." It takes time, it really does, baby steps as Heather often says. I haven't had a binge in a year. I've emotionally eaten, yes, and I've had bumps, but I haven't eaten a whole cake or a whole this or that in awhile now. The reason? I started to work through my problems. I mean is it really about food? is it about stress coping? Is it about something going on? Is it about your past? What is the core for you?
Lifestyle changes take time, even with the all or nothing people. It just takes time to understand those changes and what they mean. That is what I think and obviously this is my own personal opinion. You will get there and you CAN do this. We all can. Of course we are gonna have our bumps! I mean I can still eat a heck of a lot of hummus in one sitting, more than I should lol. I still get emotional and such, but I'm trying.
If you feel that WLS is for you, then all I can say is what most people will say. Do the research, get consultations, and etc...just be safe! But if you need WLS then you need it.
P.S. There are also other options for you too. Therapy might be something to think about. I think we all have our core where all our issues and things come from. Without dealing with those things it is hard to progress, at least it is for me. I've really had to deal with things and now I'm learning how to cope with my emotions. I'm totally not there yet, but getting there little by little. I think you are very self aware and perhaps that is a sign of things, positive sign.
Last edited by Jacquie668; 10-03-2009 at 04:09 PM.
Yes it's possible! I too am a lifelong binge eater and I am currently controlling it. For me, therapy has been very helpful in helping me to learn why I use food inappropriately and to learn new ways of coping that do not involve food. I understand the idea of having every reason to want to change and not changing. I did that for years. I think I just got to the point where the pain and frustration of living the way I was living was worse than giving up the binging. You have all the tools you need to change your life without needing to surgically alter your body (though I do not judge those who have it). That you have previously lost weight successfully proves it. Just remember that you are 100% in control of what goes into your body. It's time for you to learn to treat yourself with the respect you deserve. You can do it!
Yes, it is possible. Through eliminating processed foods and grain-based carbs from my diet, I have been almost totally successful in eliminating the food obsessing that leads to mindless almost trance-like eating and subsequent guilt, self loathing, sluggishness, tiredness, hunger, more food obsessions, and the cycle begins again.
Now, I don't go through that at all. It is so freeing to be able to think about food in terms of what is good for your body, instead of thinking all day about what foods will satisfy your emotional cravings, and physiological/psychological food fantasies.
The great thing is, it really doesn't take that long. For me, it was a few false starts, and then three or four days of actively exercising willpower over the remaining physiologically based cravings as the "bad foods" worked their way out of my system.
And one that process was complete, the food thoughts stopped, and the binging stopped.
I hope you find a strategy that works for you. I know weight loss surgery has worked for many. I also know it has caused some individuals irreparable damage. Whichever route you decide is best for you, I wish you luck and health and happiness ...and success!
Binging isn't generally caused by physical hunger though is it? So removing part your stomach or any other weight loss surgery isn't going to solve this.
I'm not sure I can tell you how to stop binge eating but I was (and if I wasn't careful could be again) a binge eater. I dealt with it with no help (well, except praying and reading a lot and posting a little here). I spent time thinkign why I ate like that and realised I did when I was stressed, lonely, bored, angry, upset, etc. and decided I didn't want to do that anymore. Yes it was a struggle and sometimes still is but it is possible. I stay out the kitchen when feeling those emmotions now to protect myself (though that brings new problems - refusing to eat because upset, etc. also isn't good)
Oh it's possible. I was the worlds' worst eater. Just the worst. Binge. Binge. Binge.
I thought for many years that I was incapable of stopping to eat so poorly. I didn't have the strength, the will power, the control.
That was nonsense. Utter nonsense. I had the control the entire time. The whole time. It was always there.
How did I stop binging? I DECIDED to stop. That simple. I was sick and tired and miserable enough. I was scared enough. I just didn't want to be fat for another second and finally woke up from the fog I was in and realized that I didn't HAVE to be fat if I didn't want to be. That it WAS something that I could control. That it was within my power. In my hands. MY CHOICE.
I suggest you stop telling yourself that you CAN'T stop binging and start telling yourself that you most certainly CAN. I mean why not? No one is forcing the food down your throat. It IS up to you. Be brutally honest. Realize this. Own it. DECIDE to stop. Once and for all and no matter what. Tell yourself over and over again that you CAN do this. I mean why not? Why the heck not. It's not will power that you need. It's WILLINGNESS. What are you willing to do? Set yourself up for success. Make a plan. Get rid of the junk food. Don't purchase it. Make a vow, a pledge, an IRONCLAD COMMITMENT to do this and then see it through. Whatever it takes.
I wish someone would have told me years ago that I was capable of doing this (started my journey at 42 years old). Well I'm here to tell YOU that you most certainly CAN do this. Without a doubt. I'm certain of it. You CAN do this. And you should. Why wouldn't you?
Trust me on this one, it is the very best decision you will ever make, bar none.
For me, there were two times in my life when I stopped bingeing. The first was accidental but gave me some lessons for the second time when I stopped on purpose.
My binges consisted mainly of sweets, usually @ one pound of bagged candy every day, but a bag of oreos or pan of brownies for dinner would fill the bill just as well.
The first time I was able to stop this behaviour was the year I turned 30. I took a job that required extensive travel meaning 5 days a week all my meals were in restaurants. Suddenly I was getting a massive amount of calories and so had no hunger to trigger the binges. The bad news is I gained 100 lbs that year due to those additional calories but learned that I really could stop bingeing. When I quit that job 6 years later and stopped eating so much food, I slipped right back into my candy habit, in fact some periods was approaching the 2 lbs/day amount.
So in April 2005 (9 years later) when I decided I had to stop the candy habit, I remembered that no hungry = no candy binge. So I decided I wasn't going to worry about trying to diet or lose weight, I was just going to stop eating candy. I must confess, it was absolute torture. I CRAVED that candy, dreamed about it, cried over it, but made sure I ate tons of any other food I wanted. So even though I eliminated @1700-2100 cals/day of candy I didn't lose any weight at all (so good thing that wasn't my goal, eh?).
Unlike one of the posters above, cravings did not disappear after a few days. Four years later they are still there but not in my face or on my mind every moment like at first. So in April 2009 I was able to start a reasonable diet and excercise program without triggering any binges.
So my take away here is if you can identify your trigger foods, work on getting those completely out of your life and only after those are under control work on the weight loss. Recently I read a book, Thin Commandments Diet which advocates a similar approach that may help you more than my brief description of what I did.
I haven't binged (I consider a binge an out of control food bender, not just overeating - I've overate a couple of times and paid for it, but no BINGES) in a while and I pretty much second what robin said. I said to myself, Denise, you ARE NOT going to do this because in one hour you could eradicate an entire week's worth of work. Why would you want to do that? And I told myself that over and over and over.
When I get the urge to binge I leave the house. I walk around the block, I take my knitting and go to starbucks (where I only get coffee), I drive around my neighborhood, anything to keep me out of the fridge. Knitting has really been the most instrumental because it keeps my mind (counting) and my hands (working the needles) busy.
I recommend knitting on this forum a lot, but I really think it is very useful in ending binge eating.
I've struggled and I have to say that every day isn't easy but I have learned to control my binging for long periods of time. I am still a work in progress but I was able to lose 150 lbs by learning better habits and trying to work through the urge to binge.
One of my new favorite books is "The Fat Body Solution" and "The Beck Diet" has a lot of good methods for dealing the mental aspects of weight loss.
I am very much so a Binge eater and I'm on the road to recovery aswell. I think our environment has a lot to do with how much we eat and also finding the common root cause of why we do it can help change it. I'm signing up for OA and I hope to beat this addiction too! But yes this is NOT the end for us and YES we CAN stop! Cheers to you my friend on stepping up and putting your life out there and making the change for the better!
Hi All!
Thank you so much for your responses--I cannot describe how much they all mean to me. I just made an appointment with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders including obesity and binge eating. I am motivated to change my behaviors around food and finally find some joy in living.
These boards are the best!!
Hi All!
Thank you so much for your responses--I cannot describe how much they all mean to me. I just made an appointment with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders including obesity and binge eating. I am motivated to change my behaviors around food and finally find some joy in living.
These boards are the best!!
Pennie
Oh Pennie, that's wonderful! I wish you all the best and think you've taken an amazing step here. Good luck! Know we're here for you.
I have binged here and there have a bad day and go the the store and buy gobs of chocolaty sweets and have at it.. Its always the sweets and Ive been known to knock out a german chocolate cake in 2 days before I start my grand atkins plan. It's emotional eating for me, running for a safe place, feeling comfort, not being deprived and a quick fix where I get what I want when in the rest of my life I dont get anything the way I want it.. I know its harmful to myself to do this but the satisfaction is apparently stronger than my ability to resist. I am afraid to ever get the surgery if it became available in the years to come because of binge eating. Theres a man on our police dept who had the bariatric surgery and then like an idiot had a full steak dinner and ate it all, split out his stitches and bled to death.. He did it to himself knowing full well his stomach could not hold a fraction of that meal and in a moment of weakness whos to say it couldnt happen again. I dont know if I could deal with an emotional crisis and stay away from food.. that is my fix all and that is why Im as big as I am..
I usually just lurk here because techinically my high weight was only 280... but... YES it is possible and it is possible without surgery, diet pills, magic diets, etc. I think a good counselor helps but it is even possible without one. I was the worst of the worst as far as binge eating goes. I do not know how I fit so much food in my body, day after day... but I did. I went into complete, out of control frenzies with food where I would fill a shopping cart, go home, and eat it ALL before the kids came home from school. I do not do that anymore.
It has taken me two years of working on the issues, blogging, thinking, examining myself, trying various foods to find out what I need or what I cannot handle, but my binges are SO few and far between nowadays and NOTHING like they used to be. Nothing.
I feel like this is confessional time right now. I am so a binge eater at heart. I mindless binge to the point of taking in well over 3000 calories in one sitting, and then wonder why I lose twenty gain twenty every once in a while. I see it happening more in a cycle...at least the end of a really bad trip. I see binge eating as a way for me to gain some level of comfort, but such a bad choice in many other ways than one. I am not trying wls cause even if I did get it I would probably jump back into binging and causing me more physical grief than I am right now. So, doing the emotional work and keeping myself busy is going to be my main ways in slowly combating binging. I might binge later on, but today I make the choice not to do so. Good luck. Thanks for being brave enough to share.
Can I Stop Bingeing On My Own??
Of course we are gonna have our bumps! I mean I can still eat a heck of a lot of hummus in one sitting, more than I should lol. I still get emotional and such, but I'm trying.
