[tarryn]

So i know im just being petty, but thought i would share my story of "did you really just say that" as i really like reading some situations you girls have been in.

So let me set the scene- my bosses office, 9 am
People present- Myself, Boss, My area manager (a manager noone in our department respects may i add- as she is the nosiest person on planet. she is also extremely overweight (but that isnt the reason noone respects her, it just needs to be known))

So they have called me in because at the moment i am the receptionist for this company while the original receptionist/PA is on maternity leave, but she is coming back at the end of march. They are bringing me in to ask me whether i want the payroll position opening up.

So they spring it on me that they want me to do payroll...and in the area managers rave on trying to convince me to do it..she says "you know Tarryn you seriously have changed so much since you started here, you didnt have a great attitude, you obviously didnt want to be here, you knoww..you were overweight.."

i was so shocked i couldn't even say anything..1st off i didnt have a great attitude??i feel exactly the same about this company today as i did the first day i started here. 2. 'you were overweight'...i just wanted to scream ' have u looked in the mirror lately, you eat KFC for lunch every day, you have never walked more then 100 meters since ive known you and you must have a bmi of about 40!" but i controlled myself.

My boss..who is a lovely woman just went "oh..wow i dont see how that has anything to do with what we are talking about."

Anyway, i know its not the most horrible thing you could ever say to someone and i shouldnt make a big deal of it, but i just felt like a piece of crap, and the fact she said it in front of my boss, who i really respect, made me somewhat embaressed for some reason?

So i just had to share my story..and i wished id said mandelins comment "wow did you reall just say that, im so embaressed for you" (or along those lines!) But i couldnt really say it in front of my 2 bosses..hehe

[taragettingthin]

Oh wow. Did she really say that? She really lacks professionalism and I can't help it but to wonder how she was able to reach that position...

Well. my guess is that she is jealous that you lost weight and she can't. So be happy...and they must like you if they want you to take the job instead of letting you go although the original person is coming back.

[katie m a r i e]

I'm in high school so that stuff hits me everyday. Except it goes more like this -

'I'm sorry, I don't speak cow.'
Someone mooing at me. [But that is partially because I have my septum pierced]
'Get your fat *** out of my way'

Or the lovely one I hear daily from my overweight mother -

'You have a belly, and no boy is going to like you looking like that'

[tarryn]

Tara- you are so right, who really says that in front of their employer!

Katie- thats horrible, and your mum is wrong there are a lot of amazing women on this site who are overweight and have found amazing partners that arnt shallow twats. people can be so rude at school. even once in a shopping mall when i was 14, a guy walked passed me and said "um its called jenny craig!" i was barely even overweight then..i had a tiny tummy cos im an apple shape!

[efova]

Katie:

Please rest assured that all of life is not like high school. Most boys grow up to be men and many of them will think you're perfect just the way you are whether you're 160, 130, or 300 pounds. Shame on your mom for saying that to you. Comments like that say much more about the person saying them than the person they're saying it about. Keep up the good work.

[WVUFan86]

Honestly, my first reaction would be that I would listen to what they had to say and then either go back to the HR manager or back to the main boss and file a complaint. Your weight has nothing to do with your work effort. Obviously your main boss did not find it appropriate either.She may just be jealous also that you have been losing weight noticeably and she's not.

[kodama]

I agree I think it's jealousy rearing it's ugly head. Funny how often other people's bad behavior makes us feel embarrassed or ashamed. Brush it off and rock on girl!

[JulieJ08]

Originally Posted by tarryn

My boss..who is a lovely woman just went "oh..wow i dont see how that has anything to do with what we are talking about."

I am so glad your boss said something. Dang.

[grabec]

You know what? I think you are handling things really well. I am always shocked at how rude kids are to each other in high school-I mean they are animals. It does get better. Have compassion for yourself, always, always love and accept and support yourself no matter what, no matter what. And don't accept anything they say to you that you don't like-be very respectful of yourself and I do mean always.

[joyra]

Tarryn, I know you said you felt embarrassed, but it sounded like your boss was quite embarrassed by the manager. That's amazingly unprofessional!

Katie, oh please stay strong with those comments. I got a lot of comments like that in high school--"Boys may not like you but at least God does" or "[Best friend's name] on her worst day is still better than you on your best day." Those are the kind of comments that make you GAIN weight if you let them fester. Or you lose weight in an unhealthy way. I was like 20 lbs overweight in high school and I felt like crap and my peers didn't help. What I wouldn't give now to be "only" 20 lbs overweight. And honestly I'm approaching my 10 year reunion and all those people that said horrible things have done nothing with their lives and it pisses me off that I ever let their words get to me.

[Jelbb]

Tarryn:
....wooooow. It's almost as though she was trying to frame some kind of compliment. "Look what a great attitude you have, you look fantastic." And yet... she opened her mouth and an unprofessional, uncalled for, unnecessary remark of complete idiocy popped out.
Kudos to your boss as well. Karma points for pointing out that your weight has NOTHING to do with your performance there.

Katie:
I'd like to concur with what some of the other girls have said... real life is NOT like school. When you corral that many kids together at once, you're bound to have at least a small handful of absolutely no-holds-barred douchebag little children.
When I was in... the 5th grade maybe, I was chubby and essentially friendless, and relatively new at the school, and an older girl randomly said some of the most hurtful, uncalled for things to my face, so she could run off and giggle with her friends about it.
That same girl got pregnant a few years later, and from what I hear is now in rehab. Karmaic retribution is a *****.

After high school, real life will start, and you'll realize how insignificant some of those people are.