Hi 20-somethings!
My name is Michelle and I have been lurking/contributing to this site for about two years now. I joined Weight Watchers earlier this year, lost 10 pounds, then had to stop going to meetings because of cost, stop buying healthy food because of cost, you know the drill. I am definitely tired of feeling the way I do but I really needed to process out why I feel this way and what I can do about it. Maybe this post, though it will end up being long, will help inspire others to really look deep at WHY they want to lose weight and WHAT they are going to change in order to do it.
A little background: I am 24 years old, have been married to the man of my dreams for a little over a year (anniversary Oct 27th) and for the moment we are living with my mom and sisters and brother in law (full house) while we wait for our friends' condo to become available for us to rent.
I have never, in 24 years of life (ok maybe when I was 1 and 2 so we'll say 20-22 years) been fit or narrow. I wouldn't even consider "thin" for me because I've got curves baby! No problem with having an hour glass shape, I just have way more sand in the middle than I would like.
Anyway, I was sitting here at work reading through goal stories and pictures and starting thinking, "What am I waiting for? Why do I make this so hard? What are things I can do NOW to change myself and my circumstances for the better?" I thought about writing this out on paper but I type so much faster and I wanted to have people to share these thoughts with who I know will appreciate them and who are already focused on what I want and need to be focused on: healthy diet and exercise. Everything sounds and seems so good and easy and clean cut in my head but try to put it into practice and honey watch out! Well, you all know how that goes so I won't go into detail there.
Now, for my deep talk with myself (and all of you who decide to read this very long post
What am I waiting for?I am waiting until I feel like eating healthy and exercising, which for the most part (at least in the beginning) will not happen. I will have to make myself do those things. I am waiting until the holidays pass. I am waiting until we move in March and have a place of our own again. I am waiting for the circumstances to feel "right" for losing weight. They will never be right, I will never completely feel like doing it, and I need to learn self discipline and control in order to obtain the changes I want in my life and in my body.
Why do I make this so hard? I think it will be hard to find food/recipes that both my husband and I like so I don't even try. I allow myself to be control by my feelings and I allow food to control me. Why? Why?
I think I have to do everything at one time. I wish I could be like those on this website who did everything (revolutionized their diets, exercised every day religiously, stopped and beat the cravings, etc) but I am not that person and I have to ok with that. I have to be ok with taking baby steps and learning to grow into a new life style. I have lived this way for 20+ years of my life, so how can I expect to be on track with everything change, 24/7 from the start?
What will I do NOW to change?
Starting on Monday:
I will bring my walking shoes and walk for 30 minutes of my 1 hour lunch.
I will clean out the cupboards and rearrange them in a way that makes sense for the whole family to use.
I will seek knowledge from the men and women here.
I will eat a balanced breakfast, lunch, and dinner since we have the means to buy healthier food right now.
I will make myself get into bed, ready to try to go to sleep no later than 10:30.
I will read more rather than mindlessly watch TV.
What will/does losing weight mean for me?
More energy and vitality. I want to feel like I'm in my early 20's, not my early 50's (not knocking 50 year olds, just saying I feel way more run down that I am)
Healthier hair and skin. Both of mine are nice now, but I know they can be better.
I won't feel like I'm sick 80% of the year.
My teeth won't ache from all the soda I drink.
I will know what it means to have a treat and not just fulfill cravings every day.
I will enjoy the labor of love that is cooking, love for myself and my family.
I will feel better in my own skin, therefore feeling better in new, cute clothes.
I will enjoy clothes shopping.
I will want to be physically active (both in the bedroom and out
)
I will be proud of myself for accomplishing something I have fought with MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!!!
Ok, I should probably end it here. Thanks for listening/reading everyone. It helps to process it all out and makes it feel more real to me. I know that I can do this, especially with the love and support of my family, friends, and all of you here at 3FC. Thanks again.
Weight loss-what does it mean to me?
