Hi All,

I can't seem to do this. It's so hard to make it through the day without eating too much.

I read where your head and heart finally get to the right place and everything starts to click, but it's difficult.

What was the final straw that put you there? What kept you going after several days of doing this and not seeing immediate results? When did you have an ah-ha moment that got you through the beginning to push through?

Did you go for it all at once, diet and exercise? Did you ease into it, losing some weight with calorie control and then add exercise?

I can't seem to find my niche. My control in all of this.

Thanks in advance for some encouragement.

Andrea

Andrea,

I had a few false starts for about a year before I really decided to do this. For me, it was a "click" moment. I finally came to a point where I knew that I COULD do this. Shortly after beginning (about a month), I joined 3FC. I joined some of the small groups (50+ and Christian Encouragers). They really helped keep me going when I had bad days.
I joined the Biggest Loser Challenge 3 times. It really helped me as well. Being part of a team kept me thinking outside myself. Having to be accountable to others that were depending on me was helpful. I posted in the accountability threads too. Having to record my calorie count for the day, and my exercise sometimes gave me that extra nudge in the right direction.

I also had to keep a journal in Fitday - every day. I had to write down everything and hold myself accountable this way. It was a real eye-opener for me. In the beginning, I planned my next day in Fitday - even my snacks. Sometimes I strayed from the plan, but almost always - I made good choices and substitutions. Planning really was important for me.

I DID add in exercise very early in my journey. I think it helped me immensely! Not only did it help speed the weight loss, it boosted my metabolism, my mood, my energy level and helped me look better in clothes as I lost weight.

I found that I had to eat clean, and often. I need to balance each meal or snack (not just balance my calories over the day). I need protein every time I eat. Eating 6 times a day, really is a key for me. Having healthy snacks within arms reach is a must. I have them in my car, my purse, my office, everywhere.

You CAN do this! It will be an up and down journey. You will try some things that don't work out so well. Others will work great. You will tweak things along the way.

It doesn't matter if you fall occasionally - we all do. What matters is that you pick yourself back up and get right back on plan.

I can't wait to see your post in a week or so, telling us how GREAT you are doing! Keep coming to 3FC for support - it does help!

I did some "all at once" in that I started exercising and counting calories at the same time. But that was a long time ago - I have progressed from my exercise being walking to teaching spin classes and weight training and thinking about training for a 100 mile bike ride. What started with simple calorie counting has progressed to tracking protein/fat/carb ratios and working towards eating less processed foods.

I've fallen down TONS of times...but I always get back on track. I don't give myself a choice. What I have built is habits I plan to keep the rest of my life - and I'm ok with that.

for coming here and asking questions. I can't give you motivation, but hopefully we can all give support and ideas and tricks.

I started out VERY slowly! If I really want to go back, I started about a year ago with Alli and not doing anything else. (It didn't work-go figure).

My ah-ha moments also piled up slowly. It started with a gall bladder operation almost two years ago and a super slow recovery. I *knew* that I was having such a rough time recovering because of my weight and lack of physical fitness. I didn't talk about it, but I knew that was it. My cholesterol had creeped up in spite of the fact that I am a vegetarian. I had a flu that put me in bed last year for a week, that also was a result of my weight/physical health. Finally, my knees started going bad on me. Every time I squatted to clean the litter box my knees hurt. There was no doubt that was a weight issue also. I finally realized if I didn't do something, I would stroke out in another 5-10 years.

I started very, very slowly. I went on walks every night. Mebbe around 45 minutes to start, slow but steady. I eventually upped my walks to 90 minutes (5 miles) pretty much 5-6 nights a week. I was very lucky that I was in a place in my life that I had the time to do that. I used to come home drenched in sweat, stiff as anything, starving, but feeling really proud of myself.

The weight didn't budge! And I read something on yahoo about writing down everything you eat, so I started that. (Still not even any knowledge about calorie counting). Just the act of writing down what I ate changed my habits almost immediately.

Eventually I found this site. I started writing down the calories of prepared foods, but ignored calories in fruits & vegetables. (That still makes me giggle). Than I started using a measuring cups and eventually I bought a weight scale and found a program to keep track of all my food on my phone.

Excercise progressed from the 5 mile walks, to getting a bike and biking to and from town (20+ miles round trip). Once it got cold I was able to transition to a gym. I used to HATE gyms so this was a big deal for me. I got lucky, our school has a brand new one that is amazing and I adore the place. Again, I started out just doing elipictal for about an hour approx 3 times a week. About a month ago, I have finally started doing weight training. I am still trying to get a handle on weight training, but I am sure I will get into a groove before too long.

During all of this, I made the trip to the doctor to make sure all my levels were good. I also didn't lose any real weight for the first couple of months, although I started to lose inches immediately. I am glad that my eating/working out evolved so slowly. What I am doing now is not hard, it doesn't take a big effort to follow through on any of it (even going to the gym). It is simply a way of life that I am very comfortable with, which is amazing.

To be honest, at this time, I can't imagine living any other way. I cannot tell you the impact this has had on my life. My knees don't hurt anymore, I am not tired, I almost never get sick and when I do, it's not as severe. My reaction to stress is to go work-out and I almost always leave the gym feeling like I can handle anything going on in my life. I'm single and have been for ages now. Guys are starting to pay serious attention to me. I love it, but it makes me sad because I know that they wouldn't have looked at me twice 6 months ago. I am finally out of the plus size clothes which was a cause for celebration for me.

That's not to say I do it perfectly. I had a lot of big binges early on. I had to learn how to deal with eating out which was incredibly hard. I had days where I just plain old didn't want to stay within calories. This is happening less and less these days, but TOM is still pretty close to out of control, I try to reign it in somewhat and not beat myself up for going off plan during this time.

Welcome and good luck! Go slow and be gentle with yourself. You have a wonderful community of caring, knowledgeable women here who are on the same journey as we are.

Andrea? You've lost 23 pounds. You don't need to start, you just need to keep pluggin along.

I'm sure a lot of us never have an aha moment. It's start, restart. plowing, restart ...

Are you logging your food even if it's off plan? That's good because it gives you a benchmark on which to improve. I had to log a day at over 2300 cals but it's there for me to see. I know I can do better than that each day. And I know what I can cut out of it.

26 pounds ain't nothin' to sneeze at. Congrats!!!

In a way success begets success and as the process unfolds certain things get easier. For me, nothing is harder than getting in shape but once I am in reasonably good shape, exercise is fun. So even if exercise is hard right now for you, it will get better, and someday might even be a little fun.

Like Gina, my nutrition has evolved over the years. I have gone from calorie counting to eating to support my weightlifting addiction, I mean habit. So you don't have to have everything figured out right now. Trial and error is okay.

And that last point (about trial and error) has been the biggest reason for my success (so far) this time around. There will be missteps. There will be days I don't do what I had planned to do. It doesn't matter. What matters is the NEXT choice to get back on plan. Sometimes I go through "the next choice is what matters" mental spiel several times in a week, or even in a day. But Susan is correct, keep doing what you are doing. Sometimes it is just perserverence and not anything magical or earth-shattering, but slogging forward the best we can.

Good luck!!!

Andrea I had my "aha" moment when one day I was getting ready for work and was putting on my jeans. I looked at these jeans and first noticed how ugly they were, elastic waist, dark blue and straight legged that made my but look really dumpy and my legs big. Then I looked at the size and was horrified to see they were a sz 24! I hadn't been in a size 24 in a few years and just didn't know how it creeped up on me. I finished putting on my jeans and ran to my full length mirror which had been hidden in my closet. I took a good look at myself and realized I was 31 years old but looked like I was about 50 wearing "granny" clothes that fit but had no sense of style. I just felt awful. I went to work that day and my mind started churning about what I could do fix this problem. What I did was....

1. I bought a scale and weighed myself. Seeing "that" number was hard to deal with but then you move on.

2. I pulled that full length mirror out and started looking at myself from head to toe and decided what I liked and didn't like about my body.

3. I knew from prior experience with my low blood sugar that low carb would work best for me so I went online and started researching. Knowledge is key!!!! I went to a few sites online and also punched in my height and weight to get a good idea of my calorie range. Also, if you are getting hungry you may want to look at how much protein you are eating. If you're eating too many carbs they may be leaving you with that "empty" feeling.

4. I knew that exercise was important so I also looked into what was best for me that would aid my weight loss but would work in my lifestyle and settled on walking. I eased into the walking. I started walking on my 15 min break at work and worked up to walking on that break and my lunch too. Now I've been going in early and getting an extra few minutes there too.

I think the most important thing is to do what's right for you. Figure out what works in your life and what you can manage. Also don't beat yourself up if you lose sight once and awhile. We've all done it (LOL read my blog and you'll see how many times I've faltered). One more word of wisdom, you are NOT defined by your weight, you are defined by the person you are inside. Good luck to you and I hope you achieve all the goals you set for yourself!

southerngrl, I saw a photo of myself from over the summer and it was a huge eye opener for me...I got to a point where I woke up dreading my day and not wanting to get out of bed...I thought about my weight morning, noon and night and knew I (in my heart of hearts) wanted nothing more than to be healthier---for me, my kids, my husband--I wanted to feel good enough to be a GREAT mom, I wanted to see my husband's eyes light up again when I came out of the room dressed and ready to go out with him...I wanted to walk with confidence....I knew I couldn't do these things to my best abilities without taking better care of myself..that meant watching my calorie intake and getting exercise--later it meant upping my water intake to 100 oz. and eating tons of fiber and whole foods..

If this is really important to you, surround yourself in support--any way you can--and set your environment as such...best of luck..we all know here what you are going through..

YOU CAN DO THIS! You are already down many pounds!

Vealcalf......You bring up an EXCELLENT point I missed...YES, KNOWLEDGE IS KEY! The internet is a complete wealth of information as is this site. Use it to your benefit. Experiment with some of the ideas found here and find your groove.

What keeps me going? It helps me to set some goals that don't involve the scale. We can control behaviors, while we can't always control the number on the scale, which fluctuates for a whole host of reasons. So, it has helped me to set goals around exercise, calorie intake, things like that -- things I CAN control. Exercise is really key for me, I simply can NOT do it with diet alone.

We also have to maintain the mindset that it is a long term process. That's probably the hardest thing, because we want progress to happen faster than it does!!

My "aha" moment came when I had literally outgrown everything in my closet and I was faced with buying a larger size than I had ever owned before, go naked -- or lose weight. Then I stepped on the long-ignored scale to realize that I weighed more than I had 9 months pregnant!!! I realized that I could either continue to ignore my weight or deal with it, the choice was all mine.

And I eased into it little by little, one incremental change at a time. Moving more ... eating less ... and then kept adjusting over time.

I had started and quit diets many times before. I never severely yo'yo'ed (my most success was maybe 20 lbs) but I had started a diet many times only to quit.

Finally, I had my ah-ha moment this past April. I was a member of WW online and was only doing it half-*ssed. Then my moment came. It was a realization that a diet wasn't what I needed, I needed to change my life.

I cancelled my WW subscription and joined a gym the next day. Today I am 45 lbs lighter and on my way to my goal. BUT! I never feel like I'm on a diet. In fact I'm not ON anything, I've just changed my lifestyle to include exercise and healthier foods. It's never going to end, not even at goal, because this is my life now - and I love it!

Everyone has a different moment or come to their new lifestyle gradually. The important thing is 1. You've already had great success! 2. You need to do what works for you.

At the end of the day, no one can motivate you but you. With your weight loss already it looks like you're well on your way.

My final straw: I hadn't been on a scale since I had my daughter who is now 3, I was 190 when I had her. I got on a scale in Aug and I was 231! I was crying, and I mean, hysterically like my 3 yr old cries when she can't have candy or get something @ the store! So I decided it was time to do something about it. I'm doing it slowly though, trying not to take on too much at once, cause I'm afraid I'll get overwhelmed & fail. I have went from 231 to 195 just by counting calories, no exercise. My plan is to wait until I reach my plateau and then start exercising at that point. I figure that might be the "kick" that I need to get over the dreaded plateau when it happens.

For me the scale is my enemy. I get discouraged very easily.. If ive did everything right for a week and i hop on the scale to see a loss of 1 or 2 lbs...or lets even say a gain...I freak out!~ So I have learned not to weigh..I weigh about once a month to see my progress but other than that im not letting the scale determine whether i eat good or not...this is so much more than just weight loss , im doing this for my health too. Its just better this way for me because if i weigh and get discouraged i usally fall off of plan. Don't let the scale discourage you...just keep going something is bound to make a difference

I lost a pile of weight several years ago and then let things slide and gained everything back... My ah-ha moment was recently we were at a hotel and I saw all of my nekkid hide in the oversized bathroom mirror That was the final straw. I was denying how much I had gained but it was painfully obvious in this mirror. I don't have any full size mirrors at home... I have cut back on my eating and ammaking wiser choices in what I do eat. I have also upped my exercise to make it actually having me sweat. I did a lot of walking but it wasn't enough of a workout. I am already down 15 pounds (in the past month or so) and I am back on track. It's a tough haul but I am worth it

Bingo. This is it for me too ... I absolutely hate the concept of a diet. I realized that diets don't work for me and the only thing I can do is make eating healthy and exercising not optional.

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