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Old 04-14-2008, 07:52 PM   #1  
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I cannot stick on plan. I do great for a couple of weeks then I get way off track. For some reason I just cannot stick too it. My husband and I are trying to get pregnant so you think that would help me stay on track but it isn't. I just don't get why I cannot stick to this. I quit smoking a year cold turkey. I have great will power in some things. I just don't get what is standing in my way here. Any help?
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Old 04-14-2008, 07:59 PM   #2  
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Maybe try smaller steps. You don't need to change everything at once. That is a good recipie for giving up. But if you make a few small changes today, and then add a few more changes in a week or two.
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Old 04-14-2008, 08:05 PM   #3  
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First, Big Hugs to you. I do exactly the same thing. I've always said food is my "drug" of choice. It's a bad, bad habit to give into food for comfort.
Is it close to your cycle?? That can cause mean and hateful cravings.
Is there something really stressful in your life?? Sometimes, life is just stressful. Many here say I have a lot going on etc. Well, dh & I have 8 kids between us so there's always a lot going on. We can get past it.
Like today, I was only 199 calories over my planned amount. Yesterday, I was over by 1000+
Be determined to get right back on. Write down what you eat or use fitday.com or other free sites. I use another that has a forum, but I only post my food intake and never participate in their forums cuz frankly, this place is the best there is. PERIOD!
So, here's another
Remember, no one is perfect every day. We just keep on trying. Someone's signature says the only failure is to give up.
We're all in this together.
Sandy
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Old 04-14-2008, 08:12 PM   #4  
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What type of plan are you trying to stick to? Sometimes it could be that you've set your goal too low, or that you're missing something out of your diet. Your body may be fighting back to get what it wants. One bad day also doesn't mean that you are off track. If you can hold it to one bad day and start fresh the next day that may help. I used to do the 'I had a bad meal/day/week' so I might as well forget about it for the next 'day/week/month'.

So forget what happened today and start fresh tomorrow. You can do it.
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Old 04-14-2008, 08:33 PM   #5  
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Keep changing the plan until you find one you can live with! Also, if you go offplan for a meal - you are not OFFPLAN for the rest of your life, just get right back on! Don't try to be PERFECTLY on plan, try to be CONSISTENTLY on plan!
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Old 04-14-2008, 09:53 PM   #6  
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try first evaluating what your normal routine is not just in eating but activity and water intake...

write it down......all of it.........

then decide what you want to change make one change in each.

ie: more vegies, more water or water before you eat, walk 1 block or park the car at the end of the lot to get extra walking in....

do those changes for a week or two and when you feel comfortable change another thing.....

We did real well with our changes because I didn't change everything all at once...

the main things we changed 1st was no red meat & no fried....and eat dinner before 7pm

then after a couple of weeks I noticed I was filling up on pasta & rice......so I increased my vegies & fruit and drank water before I ate

then someone shared something about water intake....so the next thing I changed was working towards drinking 80oz each day(some days I still don't make that) also threw in some walking on the treadmill

Now I do 2-3days of treadmill or WATP DVD some upper body weights......And I'm starting to watch my fat intake a little better.....and next week depending on the scales I may decrease my calories by 100

I was able to do all those things because I did not try to do them all at once....I just kept adding to as I noticed another area I could improve on.

btw I am a calorie counter and follow my own plan so this way I will be able to just keep it up after my weight is gone .....rather than stopping a "diet" and starting maintainance.

I think in the past I had failed because I would diet and then lose weight........then once I got off the diet I would just gain it back.....

this time it is an allover change in my life...

Dh calls it our "LIVE-it" since we don't want to DIE LOL
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Old 04-14-2008, 10:23 PM   #7  
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I take it nice and easy. Right now my goal is the next two pounds. I cheat, too. I have too much weight to lose to be really strict with myself. Being really strict makes me miserable. And, dieting is difficult enough without putting added mental stress on myself. It took me a long time to put it on, it'll take me a while to take it off. One thing I learned through my life of dieting is that at my age it just is not all that important any more. By that I mean that I don't diet for my looks like I did when I was young. Now I am taking the weight off just to make my life easier. For example, knees hurting, and all the other stuff that we really heavy people go through.

Of course, I look forward to the day when I can wear nice-looking clothes. But, I'm not fooling myself. I just ain't as young as I use to be.

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Old 04-14-2008, 10:30 PM   #8  
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Think progress, not perfection. Too often we have grand global plans, and anything an iota short of perfect feels like failure, when it's more accurately 90% success. If you are off plan one day in 10, that's still 90% success, right?

Eating isn't like smoking, because you can't give it up completely. Instead dieting, weight loss, and weight maintenance is more like practicing violin. It's a lot of little steps to learn, and there isn't black and white/failure and success, and your success may look a lot like someone else's failure, and vice versa. Instead, try to play the best you can, and appreciate that the music you're making is getting closer to what you want it to sound like.

Like playing an instrument, weight management is complicated to learn, and requires practice, often more practice after you master it than before. Be patient with yourself, but strive for progress rather than perfection. Is today better than your "average" day before you started this jouney. Well, that's worth celebrating? If it's a bad day, how many good days preceded it? Are you thinking that one bad day makes the previous days not count (not true). Look at the successes and build on them rather than dwelling on the mistakes and shortcomings. An "almost" every day is better than any single perfect day.

I have absolutely never lost weight so slowly as this time around. I've also never, ever gone so long without a major backslide. There are some physical causes for both, but I think the mental change was in seeing only gaining/backsliding as failure. At our TOPS meeting, we go around the room saying whether we've gained, lost or turtled (stayed the same) everyone who loses weight or turtles gets a round of applause, and everone who gains receives a sincere "we're glad you came." Even the latter is a reward of sorts, acknowledgement that even though you may have gained, you get credit for showing up and participating in the process (not an insignificant acheivement, in and of itself).

For me, TOM and high carb eating are likely to trigger cravings, severe enough that they're very hard to control. A change in bc to eliminate TOM's (not practical, of course, if you're trying to conceive) along with a lower carb diet helps. I've screwed up my metabolism so badly with a lifetime of crash dieting, it's still slow going, but I'm learning patience.

Also for me, I NEED in-person group support. I need that weekly weigh-in, and the positive peer pressure. For me, that means TOPS (taking off pounds sensibly). I thought the little contests were lame when I first started TOPS about 15 years ago, but they really can be surprisingly motivating. I lost 60 lbs in the 90's, but changed jobs, cities, and dropped out (stupid, stupid, stupid). This time around, I've vowed to be a lifer. One of our members, I believe has been a KOPS (keeping off pounds sensibly, that is withing leeway of their goal weight) for over 20 years. Several of our members have acheived and lost KOPS several times over, but without regaining all of their weight. I don't consider that failures, or even partial failures, but a realistic attitude toward body weight. There will always be ups and downs, and sometimes they'll even be a little steep. But even though "leeway" is 5 pounds on either side of goal weight, if I could reach and stay within 50 lbs of my goal weight I would consider it an amazing, awe-inspiring success and anyone who had the gall to say otherwise would get an earful.

Don't be so hard on yourself. Consider joining or forming a weight loss group. Peer pressure can be used to good advantage (I'm biased of course, but TOPS is great and affordable). Even a walking buddy can be great incentive. Consider a sticker chart for your progress. I do one for pounds, but also one for exercise. The pound stickers I can't always control, but every day I have the choice to exercise - I give myself a sticker for every 20 minutes of exercise. At 5 stickers, I give myself something cheap and fun (my next "treat" planned is a download for my new MP3 Player, so only about a buck).

Basically, find out what it takes to keep the process fun, interesting and most importantly, doable. Consider even a week with no gain a roaring success a B minus, if you will. A loss of any amount (even a few ounces) is an A plus (over a pound is "extra credit").

It may all sound like mind games, but this is a battle that is won or lost, first and foremost, in the mind.

Probably the single most valuable advice I can give, is to literally treat yourself as you would a loved one in your position. What would you say to them? Would you say "you might as well give up now, you'll never succeed, lardbutt," or would you say "don't beat yourself up, you're really doing great, and I know you can keep it up if you don't get discouraged. What can I do to help?"

Give yourself an alternative personality if you have to (heck give her a new name, if you want to), but treat yourself as your own best friend. Most of us would treat a sick, mangey dog better than we treat ourselves, and I think the first step to becoming healthy is treating ourselves like we deserve it.

Last edited by kaplods; 04-14-2008 at 10:34 PM.
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Old 04-14-2008, 11:27 PM   #9  
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I can't possibly say anything better than what Kaplods did, so I can only add that I'm going through the same thing right now, so I feel your pain. You are not alone, and that, I think, makes it better. We'll all make it if we just stick with you -- you, me, and everyone here. There is nothing standing in our way but our own bad habits, and you've already proven that you can beat those
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Old 04-15-2008, 09:25 AM   #10  
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I am the same way...everyone keeps saying take small steps so that is what I am doing. I have added more water and less pop. I was trying to count calories but have stopped..I need to get back with that. I dont exercise yet...so guess we all have that problem at one time or another.
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Old 04-16-2008, 08:47 AM   #11  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by missmuffet View Post
I take it nice and easy. Right now my goal is the next two pounds. I cheat, too. I have too much weight to lose to be really strict with myself. Being really strict makes me miserable. And, dieting is difficult enough without putting added mental stress on myself. It took me a long time to put it on, it'll take me a while to take it off. One thing I learned through my life of dieting is that at my age it just is not all that important any more. By that I mean that I don't diet for my looks like I did when I was young. Now I am taking the weight off just to make my life easier. For example, knees hurting, and all the other stuff that we really heavy people go through.

Of course, I look forward to the day when I can wear nice-looking clothes. But, I'm not fooling myself. I just ain't as young as I use to be.

very nicely put!
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