[ashisback]

How do you tell your future husband that your ED is back? I really am starting to worry myself. He knows I had a big problem with Bulimia in the past. It's not like I am purging again though, it's my mind set. If that makes sense... I just can't bring myself to eat much. I'm trying so hard to lose weight the right way, and the pounds are falling off, but lately my desire to eat had dissapated. I mean I eat but not much. Like today I ate a little pretzel and a sliver of pizza (I know, not the healthiest choice). And I'm full, I'm not hungry, I have no desire to eat more. And on days I do eat more, I get disgusted with myself. It's like my brain tells me, nope your too fat to eat this much... etc. I hope no one thinks less of me, but I really just don't know what to do, I have no where or no one else to go to about this. I'm afraid to go to my fiance and tell him about this because we have enough problems, like financially and everything; but I'm also afraid if I don't then I'll become anorexic.

[HarpoChicoGroucho]

I don't know, after my first two relationships ended partly due to my food issues, I keep quiet about it. It's just too much for them to handle.

You know what's coming next: you are going to start bingeing, bingeing, bingeing. And since you're in the weight loss state of mind, you'll compensate by purging.

I have very carefree, non-serious relationships now, so I don't think it's important to open up to my "boyfriends" now, but this guy is your future husband. If you don't tell him you're struggling, how is he supposed to help you through it? It's always been my dream to have someone beside me when I go through tough times. You're lucky, so don't keep quiet. It also isn't fair to him. You don't want to enter into a marriage with a secret.

And as a side note, the majority of bulimics have anorexic type behavior (the severe restricting), but it's not a common progression from bulimic to anorexic. It happens, but I wouldn't worry about "becoming" anorexic. The bingeing/purging feelings keep the cycle going, and those feelings are hard to substitute with the feelings of prolonged starvation. I'm sure you're familiar with the cycle. If you don't start healthy eating now, you're setting yourself up for a massive binge. I don't have to tell you that, though. You already know.

[OnlyMeantWell]

I think you should just tell him that you are having issues again. He might take it well and he might not. I had to tell my boyfriend a few months after we started dating because the exact same thing that is happening with your mindset happened to me as well. I know I can talk to him anytime about it..but he doesn't understand. I think it's still important for me to let him know what's going on though..even if he can't give any advice or even sympathize, I just tell him to shutup and let me talk.

Good luck, stay healthy!

[Me23]

That's hard. Of course we wouldn't think less of you.
I think, if it's a serious relationship, you have to be honest. If he loves you he'll accept your struggles as well as your good points.
And I agree, by the way: unless you are a severely ill anorexic, starving *will* lead to a binge. It's almost inevitable.

[pounds off]

I think you need to focus on you and your health more than you need to focus on how to tell your significant other. Whether you tell him about it or not, the problem still exists and if you dont do something about it, the thoughts of bingeing will turn into a full blown disorder. The right thing to do is to find help and get this under control. You can make the choice if you want to tell him about it or not, but for you and your health, you need to stop this before it gets any worse.