I wonder how many of us here are yo-yos? And what do we do that's so "wrong" that we re-gain the weight we fought so hard to lose?
I've lost weight about 6 times in my adult life (and by adult, I mean since graduating hi-school). Each time it was a significant amount of weight. 25 pounds, 30, even 40 pounds. Each time I've kept the weight off for apprx 8 months before I started gaining back. This is the 2nd time in my life that I have been over 170 pounds. The 1st time I reached 178 was almost 7 years ago.
Each time I've said "This time it's different! This time I will NOT gain it back!" but yet... something always went astray. Usually my eating habits, of course! - but twice now - in fact, the last two times I re-gained the weight I lost was due to lack of exercise because of physical disabilities. Once I got off the exercise track, little by little I began to eat "badly" again. You'd think that a person would purposely NOT eat so/too much when they knew they couldn't exercise. But I actually did the opposite. It's like I was so depressed about not being able to exercise that I just gave in to all temptation & ate whatever was around.
So how can us yo-yo dieters ever get to our goal weight and STAY there? I'm afraid right now! Because I want to lose the weight, but afraid I'll gain it back again. How to get over this fear?? What can I do differently this time that I haven't done before? It's very frustrating!
For 20 years (starting when I was an "oh so heavy" 140 lb high school sophomore until I was a 200 lb 35 year old), I lost and regained weight over and over. I managed to diet myself fatter and fatter.
I always wanted to diet for a short time (no matter how unpleasant, hungry, miserable, restrictive it was) and then go back to eating "normally." Normally for me meant eating big muffins and ordering the biggest latte and the biggest mix-in at Coldstone. Normally meant fast food and pizza and entire bags of chips. Normally meant never turning down food when it was presented - free bagels after a work meeting, cake at a baby shower, bread baskets before meals.
In 2004, I really really sat down and tried to figure out why I could always lose weight but I could never keep it off. I was really good and "disciplined" for the short term, but could never stick to it for the long term. I thought there was something wrong with me - I was weak, I had no will power. I realized that what I thought was a struggle with will power was really just my body's struggle to live - I used to restrict so much my body eventually rebelled and MADE me eat. (as it should, the body's will to survive should be stronger than my will to restrict).
When I lost weight, 2 things always happened:
1. I would reach a goal weight, stop dieting, eat normally and regain all the weight I lost and more.
2. I would binge, get tired, get bored, give up, stop dieting, eat normally and regain all the weight I lost and more.
After really looking hard at my dieting history, I saw the common theme was "stop dieting, eat normally, regain weight." I realized I had to never stop dieting, change how I normally eat. So, that's what I did.
Instead of some horribly restrictive, miserable diet - I made changes I could live with. I didn't have to give up sandwiches or waffles, I just had to eat whole grain versions. I didn't have to give up pasta and sauce, I just had to eat smaller, measured portions of whole grain pasta and add tons of extra vegetables to the sauce. I realized I didn't have to order the largest portions any more (a tall is a good size at Starbucks - this was a relevation for me). I don't have to eat food just because it's offered to me (this was also a revelation for me).
Instead of burying my head in the sand when I started to regain weight, I decided to become accountable - forever. Weekly weighing, daily calorie estimating. Nothing so obtrusive that it interfered with life, less time consuming than cleaning out the cat box everyday.
Very long answer, I can say it more simply "I changed normal forever." Nearly 3 years of maintenance (weight rock solid between 127 and 131 for 3 years), still perfectly happy, still feel great and energized all day, still loving eating whole foods.
Wow Glory! - that's a mind opener! I think you may have very well said EXACTLY what I needed to hear! (or typed what I needed to read... you know what I mean! ) Thanks!!!
I've really only ever lost a significant amount of weight one time. I got down to 146 which was really too light for my bone structure, but I loved it. I was a gym rat which was really the only way for me to maintain it at all.
I simply couldn't make the leap into maintenance. I didn't have a goal anymore and I really was kind of lost. Then I met my husband, started going out to eat all the time, not living in the gym anymore, and POOF! I doubled in size. Bad habits came back, good habits were banished and that was that.
Strangely, I'm not worried about that this time. It's hard to put into words, but I just feel different. Calmer and with a much better understanding of what goes into keeping weight off. It seems much more like a scientific equation this time, put x in and get x out. I also finally sat down and explained to my husband why I thought I couldn't maintain last time and just saying it out loud to somebody seemed to make it much clearer in my head.
Maybe I should be more worried but I'm just not. I'm actually looking forward to the process now that I've figured out that it is a process and not a finish line.
I can't promise anyone that I will never yo yo again, but at least this time, I have some idea of what will be necessary to maintain. Reading about maintenance on here and reading the Ann Fletcher books has really opened my eyes.
One diet I followed, years ago, had one sentence about how to maintain. It said "never again eat anything with refined sugar or flour in it". I was, like, huh? I didn't even know what they meant. Needless to say, I did eat things with sugar and flour.
I would say I yo-yo but never with large amounts of weight, just a few pounds so I can't really give any better advice then what Glory gave - so just read that again! haha
Great story and all too close to mine. Exactly in fact. I too was in high school, 140-145 and thought I was fat... Boy did I not know what was comming!
Gained about 30-40 more, then lost 20, then gained 40 more.... now I'm just mad at myself for letting me get this way.
A little over two weeks have passed and I've lost 5lbs. I am sort of doing what you mentioned, finding ways I can cut back, eat less of the foods I love, making better food choices and adding exercise to the mix. I have a busy lifestyle, and it's not very easy... but I have. Well, my husband is going along with me, only he won't eat veggies or some of the foods I have been eating ... he still eats his 2 peanut butter sandwiches for lunch, everyday. Just with whole wheat bread. And still eats his greasy fish sticks at night, but with no rice. He's lost 10 lbs. It's just not fair. I had a fit today and ate some chinese food, that is not sitting very well in my stomach right now!
Thanks for the inspiration, maybe tomorrow will be a better day for me!
From a fellow individual who has followed the "lose weight-get injured-get depressed-start eating-gain weight" cycle at least 3-4 times (I feel SO much for you because I understand 100% what a frustrating cycle it is, because you feel helpless ), I can tell you what I'm doing NOW, after losing 127 lbs this time around and then killing my knee, that makes it different than the other times.
This time IS different, because I am actively managing the depression and refusing to give up, and I have absolute confidence this isn't going to be like the other times (in fact, since my knee went out, I actually broke my 6 month plateau and lost 2 lbs, which shocked me).
1. Actively manage your depression. Now, this can be difficult if you are used to using exercise for mood control, like I do. But there is always something you can do. Are you seeing a physical therapist? Can you start? Even going in and working really gently with a professional helps me feel like I'm DOING something about the problem. Sure, my leg strength is in the toilet, but I am working on it. The second part of managing your depression is refusing to eat to soothe it. Just refuse. Because it never makes me feel better - it usually makes me feel guilty, overfull, and miserable.
2. Find yourself some cheerleaders/motivating reasons. For me, it was two particular chickies in the board (Rockinrobin and Heather) who told me that THIS was their greatest fear...losing the weight, getting injured, and gaining it back. I decided I was going to be the proof that it didn't have to derail you. Seems simple, but I swear I think of those two every time I get frustrated and want to head for the fridge. So find some tangible thing, even if it is small, and hang onto it like nothing else.
3. Find other ways to medicate sadness and frustration. Sure, it'd be great if we were all able to get through the emotions of the day without any kind of self-soothing, but most of us can't. As long as its calorie-free, it is up for grabs. Tea, bubble baths...For the week after my knee surgery, when I was on crutches and REALLY couldn't do anything, I changed my nail color daily. Distract and soothe.
4. Acknowledge that being injured sucks, and that it is OK to be upset about it, but also acknowledge that letting it derail your eating is your choice. Being mad at the world is OK sometimes. Being mad at your body, even, is OK sometimes. But punishing yourself with food (and ultimately, it really is punishing yourself), is not OK.
I've been on 4 or 5 yo yo diets starting from about age 21. Each time I lost between 20 and 40 pounds. Each time, I gained it back plus about 20 more on top of it.
This time is different and I do have hope I won't/haven't gained it back because...
I finally realized I don't need to drastically change my eating, but that I needed to change my daily diet to something more healthy. That I didn't have to give up everything but just have it in moderation. And I've learned ways to make exercise enjoyable and to motivate myself to continue it. I realized that this is going to be a lifestyle change and not a diet this time. Cause everytime I go off a diet, I gain my weight back.
I would not classify myself as a yo yo dieter because i've never dieted before these past 2 years. Although, all thru my childhood and teenage and adult years, my weight has always fluctuated from fat to thin....but i never dieted to lose weight. Life just happened. sometimes i would be active and busy and i guess just not have time to eat so much and other periods of my life, i would not be so busy and have plenty of time to feed my face.
But after losing 33 pounds last year, i did gain back 7 of those and when it was time to jump back on the good ol "diet" track, I realized i had gained 7 pounds of the 33 back and had to start over again. It made me realize that i will or should get on the scale every week (if not every day) just so i can hold myself accountable and know if i am going over board. It just maked me realize that i will always need to watch my portions and calories.
I have never really thought about weight control before in my life until this past 2 years. I hope i have learned the things i need to know about myself and my weight that i will be able to maintain once i finally hit a goal i am happy with.
Beach Patrol...I am sure you will do okay with maintenance if you just remember all that you have learned about portion control and trying to eat healthier versions. It's okay to have pizza sometimes...just not half the pizza. Try to make sure you remember that after 2 peices, you are starting to feel full and don't NEED a 3rd or 4th peice. But if you do eat half the pizza for lunch say...then try to eat a light dinner. You can do this!! Just have faith in yourself.
Mandalinn82:From a fellow individual who has followed the "lose weight-get injured-get depressed-start eating-gain weight" cycle at least 3-4 times (I feel SO much for you because I understand 100% what a frustrating cycle it is, because you feel helpless...
almostheaven:I finally realized I don't need to drastically change my eating, but that I needed to change my daily diet to something more healthy. That I didn't have to give up everything but just have it in moderation. And I've learned ways to make exercise enjoyable and to motivate myself to continue it. I realized that this is going to be a lifestyle change and not a diet this time. Cause everytime I go off a diet, I gain my weight back.
lumifan4ever:Beach Patrol...I am sure you will do okay with maintenance if you just remember all that you have learned about portion control and trying to eat healthier versions. It's okay to have pizza sometimes...just not half the pizza. Try to make sure you remember that after 2 peices, you are starting to feel full and don't NEED a 3rd or 4th peice. But if you do eat half the pizza for lunch say...then try to eat a light dinner. You can do this!! Just have faith in yourself.
Thank you ALL so much! - I just love the "buddyship" we give & get here! - but a special big thanks to you three - it's all in black & white for me, and yet the grey area looms!
The times that I have lost weight in a HEALTHY MANNER (makes all the difference, really!!!) it's always been by eating in moderation, taking notice of when I'm full, eating much more "health" foods & way less "junk" foods - AND EXERCISING. I don't seem to be one of those people who can say NO to my favorite foods - whether it's BBQ chicken or an extra helping of broccoli. Whether it's ice cream or sugar free jello... But we all know that 2 or 3 helpings of broccoli or two cups of sugar free jello doesn't put on the weight like that one cup of ice cream or extra helping of Potato Salad... - but hey, too much of any one thing is "too much". I enjoy many healthy foods, but sometimes my problem is just that "Ummmmm it was so good! I want some more!" and then having 'the more'. And yet - no matter what I'm doing food-wise, I just feel like a loser (& not the good kind) if I am not exercising. I actually ENJOY exercise -I use it as a tool to make me feel better physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally.
I know that losing weight is SIMPLE (burn more calories than you take in) but it's NEVER EASY. And I, like many others here, have other circumstances - my herniated disks, pulmonary elmboli, going thru peri-menopause, blahblahblah... sometimes life just seems too overwhelming to even think about adding weight loss to the plate (pun!) ... but I know I FEEL so much better when my weight is down.
You guys are a great cheerleading squad! - thanks for your support and your understanding. I love y'all!
I don't seem to be one of those people who can say NO to my favorite foods - whether it's BBQ chicken or an extra helping of broccoli. Whether it's ice cream or sugar free jello... But we all know that 2 or 3 helpings of broccoli or two cups of sugar free jello doesn't put on the weight like that one cup of ice cream or extra helping of Potato Salad... - but hey, too much of any one thing is "too much". I enjoy many healthy foods, but sometimes my problem is just that "Ummmmm it was so good! I want some more!" and then having 'the more'. And yet - no matter what I'm doing food-wise, I just feel like a loser (& not the good kind) if I am not exercising. I actually ENJOY exercise -I use it as a tool to make me feel better physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally.
I'm the same. Which is why I don't keep it in the house. And if it does have to be here, it gets hid. IE: That leftover birthday cake from last weekend. Hubby still wants to keep it. So I put it in a container where I don't see it, and put in the back of the fridge. He knows it's there. If he eats it, good for him. If he doesn't, when I find it molded in a month or so, I'll throw it out. But...out of sight, out of mind. I also keep healthy foods in plain sight. I keep stocked up on fruits. Unhealthy stuff is relegated to hubby's cabinet or to the back of the fridge behind everything else. That way he can have it if he wants, and I won't want it if I don't remember it's there.
I also limit when I go out places with family. If I know I won't be able to resist the desert buffet at the Golden Coral (my dad's favorite eating hole), I won't go with them if I'm trying to keep the calories down at the time. But sometimes I allow the splurge, I go with them, and I have the cake, and even another piece if I can't stop myself. But I know that even THREE pieces of cake isn't going to put 100+ pounds back on me. It won't even put 1 pound on, IF I don't have that cake again tomorrow and the next day and the next. If I put off a trip to the Golden Coral again for awhile and I stick to my calorie limit for a few days after.
Are you a Yo-Yo??
What can I do differently this time that I haven't done before? It's very frustrating!
) Thanks!!!
), I can tell you what I'm doing NOW, after losing 127 lbs this time around and then killing my knee, that makes it different than the other times.
- but hey, too much of any one thing is "too much". I enjoy many healthy foods, but sometimes my problem is just that "Ummmmm it was so good! I want some more!" and then having 'the more'. 
And yet - no matter what I'm doing food-wise, I just feel like a loser (& not the good kind) if I am not exercising. I actually ENJOY exercise -I use it as a tool to make me feel better physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally. 
