Vent Vent Vent - Crazy Week/Sabotage/Staying on Plan
OK, so let me preface this with the fact that I KNOW what I have to do, and I'm continuing to do it. But I just want to have a little whiny moment about how hard this week is/is going to be for me and why. Indulge me and tell me everything will be ok
My sister is getting married on Saturday. As such, I drove down from where I live to my parents house this week, to take care of last minute stuff, pick up people at the airport, be here for support, and generally help in any way I can. I work from home, so its not a huge deal for me to pack up and work somewhere else.
So first challenge - I'm away from my home environment, snacks, protein powder, and gym. But that I can work with. My mom has weights and an elliptical here, and great flat terrain for running. I went for a run this morning, in fact. Totally do-able. And today I'm going to go to the store to stock up on snacks.
Second challenge - events. This week, I have three big dinners - a girls night I'm planning for my sister on Wednesday with some high school friends (which is less of a big deal because I am planning/cooking and its a very healthy, light, summery meal), Bagna Cauda on Thursday (family tradition...very heavy, wine-filled meal that is DEFINITELY not calorie friendly but is tradition so I allow it once or twice a year), and the Rehearsal Dinner on Friday...not to mention the wedding itself! I am only controlling food for one of these...bagna cauda will be a bad night, but the RD and the wedding I have choices that'll be OK. So I have a plan for this...again, other than Thursday, totally do-able. Last night was my dad's birthday...wine, steak, baked potatoes...but still, I did OK.
Third challenge, and this is the biggie. Everyone is sort of jokingly acting like I'm crazy for keeping an eye on this, because its a "special occasion". And you know, probably for her wedding itself I'll loosen up on my "rules" a bit...but not the whole week! But so far, the following things have been called "obsessive" or "disturbing": bringing my scale (so I can monitor and make sure I'm staying on track), bringing my big water jug, going for a run this morning early, and eating only 3 oz of steak and half my potato. This is exacerbated by more "joking" references to "needing to fatten me up" because, apparently, my duty as maid of honor is to have a BMI higher than the bride's (yes, she actually said that. Multiple times. Funny joke, eh?).
As I said, I know what I need to do. Watch portions, eat sensibly where the choices exist and keep portions very small if healthier choices aren't there, keep my water intake up, and exercise daily (or at least as near to daily as possible given scheduling). But its a TOUGH thing to do this week. Oh, I'll do it, but I'd really like some reassurance that bringing my scale to stay on track isn't disturbing (there is NO scale here, and when I don't have a scale, my eating gets more lenient. Knowing I'm weighing the next day makes me stay moderate) and that my plan doesn't make me "crazy".
First, I don't think you're out of your mind, or anything like that. I give you mad props for sticking to your plan as much as you are when faced with temptation. As far as the scale....I don't have a scale so I can't comment, but I do have my food diary...I'm going to a wedding this weekend and am going to be faced with big,celebretory meals. I read your post as an inspiration not to stray to far from my plan, so I'm not shocked or depressed come next week.
As far as people who are giving you crap about being vigilant, I'd probably say something like "Eating so much of that food is what got me here in the first place, I'm trying to move forward, not backward." or," You may think my way of eating/way of life is funny, but we'll see whose laughing later."...but that's just me. I get sassy. Stay strong. I think a lot of insecurity and even jealousy is hiding behind those 'jokes' and comments.
Oh Mandalinn, you're not crazy! You've worked really hard to get where you're at now and I can totally understand wanting to do everything you can to stay on track as much as possible during this week. I know I can do a lot of damage in a week and I know how much work it is to undo that damage; kudos to you for going in with the right attitude and a plan. You do what you need to and do your best to ignore the comments. They either mean well or they're just jealous; I know it's hard but try not to let them get to you.
Nothing you are doing seems obsessive or crazy to me. When I travel, I always bring my own food for snacks. When I went home for Christmas, I also brought my own cereal to eat for breakfast and went shopping for fresh fruit once I got there (and, would you believe it, my completely overweight brother-in-law snarfed down my last banana! ). And I frequently divide my restaurant entrees in half because I know they are too large. I also order a lot of eggwhite omelets with no cheese and otherwise try to find the healthiest foods available. I also get up earlier on vacation than I do when I'm home, so I can get my exercise in before we start our vacation activities for the day. I don't have a water bottle, but you'd better believe I bring my iPod.
I get comments about being obsessive or people will suggest that I'm am trying to lose too much weight. Once in a while, if someone pushes me too far, I put my foot down and point out that I track everything I eat, I know exactly how many calories I'm eating, and I also know that all of my nutrients--fat, carbs, and protein--are within the recommended range. My workouts are supervised by a professional trainer. My doctor is aware of my diet plan and is so impressed with it she's jokingly suggested I give talks about eating healthy. There can be no question that my diet and my exercise are healthy, so GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT. That usually shuts people up.
Mandalinn, according to your ticker you've lost 130 pounds. You've earned the right to do whatever you need to do to stay on plan, including telling people who are teasing you (or, worse yet, being passive aggressive) to STUFF IT.
Only nicer, because they're family, they love you, and deep down they're undoubtedly *really* proud of you for losing that weight. Or at least, they should be!
Amanda, it sounds as though you're doing great! I really admire you, actually, for being so disciplined under the circumstances. If it were me, I'd be tempted to 'maintain' for the week and cut myself more slack than I should. You are a warrior, girl, and I have no doubt that you know how to deal with your family.
Thanks, everyone. Baffled - this is me "maintaining". With the food and the running around and the alcohol that is going to be ever-present, I'd be GAINING if I didn't watch myself. Maintaining I'm OK with (heck, with my scale "stuck" at 166, I'm really maintaining anyway), gaining I am not.
The funniest part of the BMI thing...her reasoning is that "she did it for my wedding". Um, no she didn't. I was the one who lost weight until my BMI was below hers...its not like she gained on purpose! And my losing had nothing to do with her comparative BMI.
On the scale, thats the only part I really wonder about obsessive-wise. But the thing is, I -know- that if I am not weighing in the mornings, I let myself slide. I have learned this about myself throughout this journey...not weighing, to me, means a gain. But my mom and sister both gave me serious **** for it.
I have to remember that I have been heavier than everyone in my family for pretty much my entire life. Now I'm smaller (though my sis is really about the same size as me) and thats a tough adjustment for people to make.
Thank you, everyone. Made me feel better. Was seriously starting to doubt my sanity (because EVERYONE keeps playing the "obsessive" card...ugh)
It’s OK. Be proud you have a plan! I am also way too lenient with myself in a lot of circumstances. I’m just getting over a got sick, no work out, no scale, ate/drank whatever couple of weeks and my return to the scale this morning was not pretty! Better to maintain than do damage control later, and if that includes packing your scale so be it. Only you know what you need to do, everyone else will get over it.
Gosh....I can't not emphasize enough what every one else has said. If you stay on plan by weighing every morning...than by all means...take that scale with you!!!! You have to do what you have to do for yourself. No one else is going to help you keep the weight off. Unfortunately, sounds more like jeolousy than anything else. Sometimes when people are used to you being the fat one, they just don't really know how to act when you are the thin one. Being smaller than the bride??? That's just stupid. Are you suppose to gain 15, 20 pounds just to make her feel better??? Maybe she should have thought about that before the wedding and gone on a diet herself?!?!?
Sorry....I just feel for ya. I think you are doing an awesome job. First that you lost ...what was it....130 pounds!!!!! Wow!!!! And now, that you know what to do to keep it off. CONGRATS!!!!!!
Another one to add that you're NOT insane, nor are you abnormally, overly obsessive (I only use those adverbs since I think that most successful weight losses involves at least a mild form of obsession with calorie intake/output) -- scale tugging would not be something I'd do but I totally understand why you want it around to stay on track.
And congrats to you for taking proactive steps to avoid veering way off-plan; hopefully I will have the same perseverance in my Vegas long weekender next month
And of course, savor every bite of all those delicious meals.
Hmmm. I wouldn't call you crazy. I'd call you - commited and dedicated. And I applaud you for it. You stick to your guns. Don't let anyone tell you that you're wrong in what you're doing. If it feels right to YOU and harms no one (yourself included) then I don't see any problems whatsoever.
I was away the past 2 weekends and will be again this coming weekend. I packed my own food. The thing that bothered me the most about being away funny enough, was being without my scale. It didn't bug me for almost 15 years when I completely didn't step on one, but now being away from it for one day did bring about a bit of shall we say "separation anxiety"?
I think your plan sounds marvelous. Do enjoy and congratulations on your sisters' wedding.
Well, I've never packed my scale but only because all my trips involve air travel and scales don't pack well in suitcases. But if there is a scale available wherever I end up (some of my hotel rooms have had scales in them), you can be darn sure I get on it.
And kudos to you for tolerating that BMI remark. After it was repeated, I'm sure I would have responded with something I'd regret later, like "It would take more than a week of bad eating for me to get my BMI above yours." Oops, sorry, did I say that out loud? But maybe she thinks she's complimenting you. I have at least one friend that would do something like that; she frequently tries to compliment me by comparing herself unfavorably to me. It's annoying but I haven't really figured out a good way to respond.
I got such a smart mouth sometimes, I'm thinking if someone made jokes about my diet, I'd probably say something like "You think THIS is funny? Heck, you shoulda seen how funny I was when I was fat and unhealthy."
Just ignore them, they are just JEALOUS!!! I noticed that the more I lose the more everyone who weighs more than me says its "ok" to have a "free" day, I can't diet all of the time! Yeah I can, it is called eating healthy, not dieting!
The BMI thing has been a running joke for several months...ever since my wedding. It really sucks because it was present in pretty much every conversation. I offered to rig a scale for her so it said she weighed 115 on her wedding day, but thats as far as I go.
Whats crazy is that she is actually really small! She has a feminine, hourglass figure with a size 8 waist...I mean, the only places where I am smaller are the hips and the chest (we figured out once that if you removed 4 inches from her hips and added them to my waist, we'd have the same measurements...only her chest measurement has inches that actually come from boob, rather than from ginormous ribcage). I don't understand the competitive aspect of this AT ALL. I did what I did for ME, not to compete with anyone...but as soon as I succeeded, it became a massive competition.
I've never brought a scale with me before either...and every time I come back from a week with my fam, I bring a couple of pounds back with me. I can already tell the difference in my attitude having the scale here to be accountable to...less mindless snacking for sure, and much more alcohol moderation.
I really appreciate the support. It gets exhausting to listen to people telling you you're somehow upsetting them by being a certain size.
Vent Vent Vent - Crazy Week/Sabotage/Staying on Plan
Laugh laugh. You'll get through it.
You've worked really hard to get where you're at now and I can totally understand wanting to do everything you can to stay on track as much as possible during this week. I know I can do a lot of damage in a week and I know how much work it is to undo that damage; kudos to you for going in with the right attitude and a plan. You do what you need to and do your best to ignore the comments. They either mean well or they're just jealous; I know it's hard but try not to let them get to you.
). And I frequently divide my restaurant entrees in half because I know they are too large. I also order a lot of eggwhite omelets with no cheese and otherwise try to find the healthiest foods available. I also get up earlier on vacation than I do when I'm home, so I can get my exercise in before we start our vacation activities for the day. I don't have a water bottle, but you'd better believe I bring my iPod. 
Oops, sorry, did I say that out loud? But maybe she thinks she's complimenting you. I have at least one friend that would do something like that; she frequently tries to compliment me by comparing herself unfavorably to me. It's annoying but I haven't really figured out a good way to respond.
