[KateRN]

so i date a decent amount on and off, no bones about it.
however the serious relationships that come from my dating are slim to none.

i met this guy off of match about a month ago. he was so cute and messaged me first!! i looked through this critera and it said he liked all body shapes, so i emailed him back. after a few emails back and forth, we met and have since gone out on 3 dates. i cant tell how serious he is looking at me or not... but thats another issue!

he is in the navy and his submarine is shipping off for 6 months in a week or two. ... and i couldnt be more excited! its such a great chance to spend 6 months working into amazing shape and being way hot when he gets back in 6 months and see where we stand! emails and getting to know each other more while he is gone and then look amazing when he gets back...!

does anyone else ever look at a romantic or potential romantic situations and wish you'd be meeting them months down the road when you look better because you think you'd have a better shot with them?

[brat_61886]

all the time girl...all the time. good luck!!!!

[Dawn2Dusk]

I know exactly what you're saying!

My boyfriend lives in Vermont (me in Texas) and in the past 6 years we've been together in a long distance relationship, we've seen each other three times, a total of three weeks. Can you imagine that? Lol. We've been together only three weeks out of six years. Anyway.

I've been heavy all my life with him, he's never seen me skinny (I used to be 120, six years ago). Then I let myself go big time and each time he came here to see me, I was always bigger each time. I know he loves me very much but I also know he wants to see me at normal weight, too. I can feel the attraction slipping away, despite his love for me, and that's not good. I want it back.

My boyfriend will come see me this August and by then, I'm hoping to have lost at least 50 lbs. I can't wait to see his face when he sees me again.

[futurepixie]

Yes!! I know that feeling well.

My should-be-boyfriend lives in Colorado. We have mended fences after 3 years of not speaking and I went out to see him in Feb, about 25 pounds heavier than when he saw me last (I am very short and small, so that is a lot of weight on me). He is coming here sometime this summer and I am going out west in July to see him. By then I hope to look very different, and I like the idea of him being pleasantly surprised by my appearance. I also like that he couldn't keep his paws off me when i was heavier, so I know that I can be comfortable with him and that outsides only mean so much to him.

Hey every little extra bit of motivation helps, right?

[rachiebach]

Hells yeah! But then again, I also do the thing where I buy clothes that are too tight on me and I would never wear now but plan to when I lose the weight-only I haven't lost the weight yet...

[JasonsLea]

I know what you mean. I've never had a boyfriend but everytime I've ever been flirted with, I just shut down. I guess my self esteem is just too low. I always doubt myself and feel just ugly. I'm not blessed with being pretty like you.

[sockmonkey70]

You ladies must realize you ARE beautiful. ALOT Of men like their ladies with meat on them, and not just fat guys either hehe, trust me. Quite frankly I can't stand to see Paris Hilton or Nicole Richie looking girls. They make me want to vomit. Women are supposed to be curvy and soft. Now I know a few of us have overendulged our curves heheh..but we can still rock it!

Really, what matters is most is what is on the inside. Two people can be totally attractive, but totally clash in personality.

[Dawn2Dusk]

^^ I agree. Every time I talk about losing weight, my bf says I better not get skinny and would be happy with me at 150. Which is still a lot for my height.

I myself don't wish to be skinny, either. But I'm not happy with how I look right now, either. And if I'm not happy and have low self-esteem issues, people who love me would be unhappy, too.

The thing is, our guys would love us no matter what we look like (if they truly loves us). But actually trying to make an effort to look good for yourself and for them, it's such a great feeling, you know?

[junebug41]

Originally Posted by KateRN

does anyone else ever look at a romantic or potential romantic situations and wish you'd be meeting them months down the road when you look better because you think you'd have a better shot with them?

Hm. My ex is in the Navy and we were long distance. I was always trying to live up to what I thought *he* wanted me to be and every time I saw him it was worse and worse. Then he shipped out for several months and told me he didn't care if I waited or not. I was mad because he hadn't seen the *new* me yet (because that would suddenly turn the frog into the prince), but it was his loss.

So this wonderful man who treats me like a queen wandered into my life and I snatched him right up.

You should have seen my ex's face when he insisted on seeing me when he was passing through last year. Talk about last laughs.

My point, and I do have one, is that when it came time to meet at the place you mentioned down the road, it just didn't exist. He thinks you are slammin' now. It will not matter when he gets back what you look like. My best friend was in this situation. She met a man at her highest weight while visiting a friend in VA and a long distance relationshp ensued. Well, he shipped overseas for a few months and she went into diet and exercise mode and got down to 130 and when her BF came home, he kept telling her that he thought perhaps she had lost *too* much weight and he was worried about her! He liked her, just as she is. And that's how you want 'em.

EDIT: And I would like to mention that I don't think Navy men are jerks.... just the one I got!