When the first 20lbs came off, I felt great. I started fitting into clothing better and I really liked seeing the scale move.

I hit 31lbs down this week and I feel worse than I did at my starting weight. I feel softer and the lumps and bumps seem more prominent. I know exercise will help tone things up and I do need to get my head in the game there but I'm just not loving my body as much as I did before. I'm really nervous about how I will look at the end of this. I had envisioned being able to wear a dress for the first time in many, many years and now I'm not sure if that'll ever happen with flabby bat wings and chunky legs.

Has anyone else gone through something similar?

Yes I have found the leftover flab a little frustrating but resolve to work through it with toning. I have decided to get a mini tummy tuck if necessary in 15-20 more lbs. but all in all it's worth it to me. I's rather have bat wings than the big arms I did have. And weights are slowly taking care of that. I'd rather be flabby than obese. It's just about being the best me I can be.

Because your skin is looser now, fat seems flabbier. But when nearly all the fat is gone, you will be glad. And you will look better.

You will have more choice with what clothes you wear. You will look better. Surely you already do but for some reason you can't see it.

Maybe you need to take some pictures and compare your present self to your past self.

Avoid being perfectionistic and being over idealistic. Usually the mistakes we make in life have consequences. But so do the good things we do. we have to learn to accept it all.

REmember also that your health will be a lot better. You will have more freedom of movement which will make life easier. In the long run you will suffer much less than if you remain at your former weight.

So a little perspective on the bigger picture can help you let go stuff that's bothering you i think. if you start getting negative about your journey, pretty soon you will be back at the beginning again and maybe hating yourself.

Its important to retain a positive attitude. You don't have to kid yourself. In fact its better if you don't but maybe your current view of things is a little warped.

Physically, there's not much difference in how I look. I wish I could say there was but I've always carried the weight really well and I doubt there will be much difference until I'm closer to goal. I've barely gone down a dress size so far- I'm wearing the same clothing.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not giving up! I just wanted to be able to reach these mini goals and feel like I can enjoy the vanity benefits, too. But, I didn't start for that reason so it's not what motivates me.

I hope once things settle a bit I won't feel so jiggly.

It gets better, but it takes time. Some of it is just getting used to a changed body, as our perceptions lag behind reality in these things.

I'm a mass of goo that I wasn't 100 pounds ago. That's because I'm not like an overstuffed sausage with my skin as a casing anymore. That fat gets soft as you burn more and more off.

You are your own worst critic. I'll guarantee to the rest of the world you look 10X better than you think. And it does get better.

Overstuffed sausage...yep, that's something that makes sense!
Thank you for all the support. This is such a journey of highs and lows.

Hey there, a couple years ago I also lost 30 (have since gained it back hence why I'm here) and I didn't notice a difference in me at all - I, like you, carry it well as you say and unfortunately i found it demotivating that i couldn't see a difference. BUT everyone else could - I'm not saying I was showered with compliments but when i went home to visit my parents (after not seeing me for a ocuple months) could really see a difference, same with some girlfriends and also in pictures. That's the problem with weight, it's so hard to see it coming on and it's even hard to see it coming off but a good way to battle this is by taking before and after pictures, even progress pictures if you want.

So paisley mama are you taking any pictures. I am not suggesting you have to show them to anyone.

I take them sometimes and i hate looking at them but i know when i am skinnier, it is unmistakeable how much better i look than when fatter.

I also hate my teeth but unless i find a lot of money, nothing i do is going to fix them. At least fat can be removed with (edited here should be- WITHOUT) a high cost.

I avoided the camera so much that I have very few pictures and none of them official. I might go see how my old jeans fit, the ones I bought at 220+lbs and see how they go, I haven't worn jeans in a month or so and they're always the worst!

You won't start to see BIG changes until you've dropped at least 50lbs. Plus, I've noticed that the last 10-15lbs as you approach your goal weight make the most difference. Paper towel analogy is so true.

So yeah, have lots of patience. Back when I reached my halfway point, I didn't physically "look" like I was halfway at all. It took dropping another 20lbs before it looked halfway.
No matter what happens you will look 100% better than where you started.

Trying on your jeans is a good idea but also take some pictures now. You don't have to look at them until you have this crisis again.

Looks and physical appearance aside, think of how much healthier you are being 30 lbs less. WTG!!

I think we're all under the illusion that weightloss=happiness. Weightloss never goes away, and if someone has learned to be critical of themselves when they're heavy, simply that weight won't change your opinion about yourself. Go to the maintainers forum and ask them how their self view changed, most will tell you that they were the same person with the same problems and the same anxieties as they were before they lost weight.

We all owe it to ourselves to practice a little self-acceptance at any weight. That will last us into weightloss. If you're under the assumption that you will be happy when you lose weight then you might be wrong, and that's what's surfacing now.

Deep sigh.

Our bodies change over time. I weigh less at 54 with 4 grand kids than I did at 17 when I got married, and then I had twins that were over 6 pounds each!

And, man, have things shifted!

You get one body! Love it, and make the best of it.