Complete lack of support...

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  • Quote: I don't talk to ANYONE in my regular life about my weight loss or current maintenance. I live for 3FC in that regard, because I know everyone on here knows what I am going though.

    YAY!!!
  • I only have this site and that's fine with me.
  • Quote: My mom has diabetes and my dad has high blood pressure. I’m usually lecturing them about eating right but they’re old and don’t want to hear it either. Last week my dad bought 2extra large pizzas for 3 people to eat in one day and just today he brought home a 12pack of donuts. He said he was craving them and wanted a treat. I do wish he would just buy these “treats” for himself. like one donut or a small pizza for himself to indulge in. Almost like, if he keeps everyone his size he’ll feel better about himself kind of attitude.

    But I can’t say my friends offer no support, they must’ve lose 100pounds combined, but they aren’t perfect. This site is prolly the best thing that has worked for me so far. Even ghosting some of the threads so I know people are doing this for a purpose helps a lot. Good luck on your journey, but best thing I can tell you is to ignore the ppl that bring you down. You don’t need to eat what they eat even if they offer it to you. If they wanna eat bad thats their lives. And your life is up to you
    For some reason your post really got to me. I guess I understand what it's like to have someone like that in your life. Even my fiance, who is so supportive and commits to exercise and eats healthy when I do, can sometimes be a negative influence when a craving strikes him. Your advice is probably the best anyone can ever give though. You DON'T need to eat what they eat, or what they offer you. It's that simple. Even if it's uncomfortable to face that "food pusher" in your life, they can't and are not going to FORCE you to eat it. Say no enough times, again and again, and sooner or later they'll stop asking and your resolve will be that much stronger. Thank you for that little revelation.

    Sometimes just one person, whether virtual or IRL, is all you need to persevere. If you have the wonderful members of 3FC at your back, you have all you need. If you want a little more one-on-one support, let me know. I'm always looking for friends going through the same I am.
  • I agree with a lot of everyone else is saying-my family and friends are somewhat supportive but they can't relate to what I'm going through. But the wonderful people here at 3FC do! Seriously, they keep me going every single day!
  • 3fc is the bomb!

    You can ask anything, rant, get support, whine, and celebrate!
  • I struggle with social anxiety too, which results in not having many friends...I'm just too shy to meet people. Weight doesn't help much with self confidence either.

    Both of my parents have passed away and I have no siblings, nor do I have aunts or uncles nearby. The ones I was close to are gone. So I don't have family either. Not married either, and not likely to ever be. I am truly alone in life.

    So I really rely on this board for support. I find it comforting to be able to share info with strangers who don't know me. I write things about myself here that I would never speak about with people I know.

    Without the encouragement from this board, I think I would have fallen off track a long time ago. There have been many times when I felt down on myself and a kind word of encouragement from someone on this board has kept me going.

    Good luck on your weight loss; you can do it.
  • Thank you everyone for the encouragement and welcomes! It is nice to know I am not alone in this. I really think I am going to quit the other site, it is just too.....is clique-y the word i am looking for?
  • I made the decision from the beginning not to talk to anyone in real life about my weight loss journey. The commitment I made was to myself and I didn't want family or friends, no matter how well-meaning or how much I love them, muddying the waters or policing me or inadvertently hurting me with probably well-meant advice. I also come from a "food is love" background and I didn't want to hurt anyone or make things awkward by making an "even though the rest of you seem satisfied with your bodies and indulgent diet, i'm not and am making a change"- type statement.

    My sole source of support has been 3FC. I'm not really much of an online forum person in general and don't belong to any other support forums but I can honestly say that 3FC has played a major role in my success. I've gotten accountability, motivation, challenged, supported on here. I've whined and complained and asked for advice, given it, celebrated, all sorts on here. So you definitely don't have to have the support of people in real life in this.

    One thing I've realized over this journey is that you have to want this for yourself more than anything. You have to want it enough to make the difficult decisions that will be required. You can't depend on any one else wanting it for you or making you succeed. So inasmuch as support helps, this journey is kind of an individual race. A complete lack of support from real life people doesn't mean you won't succeed. Just stay focused on your own goals, keep on keeping on and doing what you need to, you'll make it!
  • My husband is supportive to an extent. He tries to make healthy food when he's cooking or at least options if there's some non healthy stuff. But, what he sees as healthier and what I want to put in my body aren't always on the same page.

    But, as so many others have said, I try to limit how much I talk to him about it not because I don't feel like he'll listen but because it's boring for someone not on this path. I mention it here and there but mostly I want the results to speak for themselves because I've started and been unsuccessful so many times in the past.

    You may wish to take a beginning picture because as you lose weight, it's easy to forget how far you've come. Just the other day I was down on myself for not really doing much this summer for weight loss. I looked at pictures from February and realized I've maintained a pretty significant weight loss and still look vastly different from then. It kind of refocused and energized me again. So, in a way, that picture is my accountability because I don't want to look like that again.