Haha! Nice
I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that, Enygirl. Proud of you for getting yourself out!
I went through an abusive situation MANY years ago as a 14-15 year old girl, with a much older "man" (term used very loosely).


I've been up and down on this fat rollercoaster for so long. It's very hard to keep the faith in myself.
I gain it back (the FAITH) very quickly once I'm on track, but I have this tendency to relax once I start to feel good, and never make it more than halfway.

Oh, thank God I found you. My Ramona is 17 months old. I was 200 when I started TTC, 220 after my miscarriage when I got pregnant with Ramona, 280 when she was born, and lost 45 pounds in 6 weeks.

Somehow I have blown up to 268.

I broke down bawling this afternoon while she was napping. I want to have another baby but I have got to get under control. I have never felt less at home in my own body.

I have not figured out how to exercise regularly but that is not the problem. I like exercise.

The problem is food. Somehow it has become an idol. Its the altar that I worship at when I feel sad, stressed, angry and out of control. Its how I celebrate good things, and grieve hard things.

I don't even know where to start. 5 years ago when I got married I was 170 and that was after a 2 years on weight watchers (prior to my pregnancy my highest weight was 225).

But I can't go back to the diet that worked for me then (all processed low-calorie food, frozen mostly). I have a daughter who needs healthy whole unprocessed food. I can't afford WW meetings.

Low carb, no carb slow carb good carb bad carb. Low cal, low fat, low sugar, high protein?

Any advice would be wonderful. But more than that I need to know that I am not alone in this and that I CAN do it again. Because I don't believe it.

Awwww Some similarities there for sure!!!
The plan itself...I'm really not sure it matters what you choose. I only track calories...that's it. I currently use Fitday.com
It all just simply about the math. I'm very good at it when I'm on the wagon!!

This time though, I definitely want to try and focus a bit more on my nutrition rather than strictly numbers.

You don't have to be able to afford any meetings, or anything to be able to do this.

My guess is that most of us could benefit for lower carb, higher protein, whole foods, fruits and veg. It sounds so bloody simple!!

My name is Linda, and I'm here!! You're not alone, and we're right where we need to be right now!!

Keep talking!


PS: Biggest issue/barrier for me, emotions-wise, my marriage! How's your relationship with Hubby? I've been married for 16 years, together for 18. We've got a nearly 15 y/o DS, an 11 y/o DD and Baby Amelia, 19 mos.
My marriage is a rollercoaster JUST as much as my weight, and most likely directly linked, timewise.

Hi famograham ! I remember you well ! Such a pretty baby in the pic ! You were always on fire with motivation and I love to read your post. Welcome back cute little Mommy . It's good to have you around ! I have been here for 3 years . Still trying to get below 200 . WOW ! I need to step it up for sure. Good Luck friend :O)

I love the name Ramona! So classic.

I would say that my advice is don't over think it. Make a change today that you can stick to -- maybe it's replacing all beverages with water or not eating after 7PM. Maybe it's just making sure you have washed fruits and veggies in the fridge and on hand. The first change is the easiest.

Thanks GJ
I have one excellent day under my belt (yesterday). I find, almost every single time I re-start this journey...that all I need to remind myself I CAN DO IT!
Here's my thinking right now:

*Drink water*
*Take my vitamins*
*Maintain ANY calorie deficit*

That's it for now. Trying not to focus on how fast I lose, how MUCH I have to lose, or how long it's going to take.
Being kind to myself, and giving myself permission to believe, is my main focus.

Eleanor, Ramona and Amelia....how sweet!!!
Adorably classic, Like Jessica said

I remember you, too. I've regained so much of what I lost, but am not giving up!

Welcome back!!

Heather!!! Yay!