Seeing people you havent seen in a while :(

  • Okay, I know someone posted on this a while ago but...i think i just need to vent...very frustrated.

    Ive done so well w my southbeach lifestyle and workout routine. I am down 34 pounds (currently at 228). I have a ways to go but its fine, im getting there slowly and surely and feel great. Ive bought new jeans and some nice new clothes and i have a waist..yes a waist! Who would have thought...but

    This is the second time i ran into someone that i havent seen in a while and like i expected some big response. The weird thing was that both times they were looking me up and down but not a word! I just couldnt help but think maybe they think i look fatter or something! Stupid, because its not what the scale said but its just my head stuck in that mode. Then i thought well ,maybe they think i have some disease and im losing weight quick and they dont want to say anything. I know i shouldnt be bothered by it but it does. Its like such hard work goes into it and it would be nice for someone to say "hey you are looking great" for a change (well my hubby does and my 18 year old son do). But you know what i mean.

    Then i asked a friend of mine who i see a couple of times a week. He has been working out with me. And he asked me the other day how much i lost..i told him and he was wow, thats great. I asked him "cant you tell by looking at me" and he said .... well, its hard, i see you all the time. If i didnt see yo ufor a while i would notice. OMG I could have cracked him in the head.

    Does this happen to any of you? The only thing i could think of is 228 is still very heavy ...had i been starting at 150 and lost 34 pounds yo uwould have definitely seen the difference.
  • You aren't going to like my response - but I don't care if a person has lost 100+ pounds, I am not going to comment. To me it is rude and personal. I don't like such attention from others.

    I am also one of those people who doesn't notice weight loss/gain on people I see every day. I know this because I have been lectured on it more than once. it is a really good chance your workout friend truly can't see it.

    Hang in there. Know that there people in this world like me who still would support you without hesitation but wouldn't say a thing without probably a specific prompt. How much you have lost IS great. Keep it up!
  • Hmmm, okay I definitely could understand that. I know i shouldnt even be bothered by it...and you are right! Thanks for posting back, i appreciate it!
  • Always remember that you are losing weight for YOU...not that acquaintance that you see every couple of years in the grocery store parking lot. Also, a lot of people will not say "Wow, you look great" or "Man you have lost a lot of weight!" for fear that it will be taken as a negative jab towards your former weight/size. It sounds like you have great support/encouragement from your husband and son...and other than you, those are the people that matter most!
  • I am glad I could help a little bit, I really know that each of us is different and that is the challenge.

    I love what magrat said too...you are doing this for you. And I bet you already love the weight you have lost and how you feel and you will continue to!
  • I agree with them. I see a few people that I *think* lost weight, but aren't quite sure (I don't memorize appearances too much). I'd rather be safe than sorry, and only comment if I absolutely know they're on a diet, and losing, and losing intentionally.

    Congrats! Be proud of yourself! It's you who knows how great the new clothes fit!
  • You are doing great! You've lost weight, you have bought new (smaller) clothes and you "have a waist"!

    I'm with the others, I would not comment about someone elses weight unless I knew they were actively trying to lose.

    Keep up the great work! What DOES matter in this journey is how you feel about you.

    I love it here at 3FC because I get all the feedback I need to keep me motivated!
  • I'm one who, A. Is not very observant. and B. Is afraid to comment regarding weight unless I know for sure because I do not want to stick my foot in my mouth.

    I'm to the point now where I wish my family and friends might notice more, but wonder if they are like me (see above) or maybe they are afraid I'll gain it back and then feel bad.

    At any rate, my husband and my best friend are very encouraging and supportive and that's most important!