As you can see by the right side, I have belonged to this forum since 07. My first "goal" has ALWAYS been 190. And I have NEVER reached it. This is making me sad/angry/frustrated/hurt...I'm not reaching for food for comfort, I really want to know what my block is. I know my problem is food...but why can't I accomplish goals??
Also yesterday was just a sad day. I allowed myself to have a little bit of chocolate, which led to over eating. Normally it would lead to a 4 or 5 day binge, but I'm just letting go of yesterday and starting today. But I realized something about that chocolate I ate. I didn't even enjoy it. I watch my husband each chocolate and he takes a piece, sticks it in his mouth, and sucks on it. He ENJOYS it. Meanwhile I have already eaten 4 or 5 pieces that I chewed a few times and swallowed. I seriously think I have a problem....isn't this what addicts do? I don't even KNOW how to help myself. But I need help....