Boy oh boy... there must be something in the air.
I didn't think so much about quitting as much as
I have been thinking of gastric bypass because of my failures.
I KNOW how hopeless we can get when our food is not going good. I KNOW how much we can miss eatting. I KNOW how tired we get trying and trying.
BUT....I also KNOW that I "gain" when I leave here.
I know I just say... "heck with it... I am going to eat"
What I don't know is....
if I stay... will I lose some weight??
If I stay.... will I maintain??
I KNOW if I leave... I turn to food.
I don't know if I stay what will happen.
Hmmm.... the worst that can happen is I gain weight.... well ... I am going to gain anyway if I leave. Soooo I guess I am here to stay a little longer...
AND I hope and pray that Tina, and Michelle and anyone else out there suffering alone stays too.
Tina and Michelle.... I want to beg you to stay... but I won't.
I will respect your decision... but I just can't stand here and not say
STOP !!!!!!
You are having a hard time of it now.... that is part of the process.
I wish it could be an easy ride... BUT it isn't.
I wish it could be fair... BUT it isn't.
IT IS NOT EASY losing weight.
But it is not easy being fat either.
It is just more familar.
This is a learning experience... you are learrning how to improve your eating habiits.
You both have experiienced success.
So you have slipped... maybe even slidinnng...LOL .... but just plant those heals into the ground and STOP the downhill plunge.
You may not be on top of it yet... but just stop the freefall.
You said you have not been here reading. Start again !!!!
You said you have been back into the food. Make one good choiice today. Just one. Just a baby step. A baby step back here with us again.
WE LOVE YOU !!!! We don't care if you are fat or thin... but I do care that you find happiness. And although I am happy "for the moment" when eatinng.... I am not happy with the body that results from momentary satisfaction.
I feel so contradictory ..... I love you whether you are eating on plan or not.... but eat on plan
How do you tell a loved one that they are fine just as they are... loved unconditionally.... yet also say... don''t quit trying.???
I don't know the words... it is soooooo frustrating.
I just want to be accepted as I am... to acceppt me now... not when I lose my weight.
Yet... those who love me... want me to lose this weight BECAUSE they love me.
They know the **** I live in because of my weight.
I am rambling..... I am going to shut up.
Just know... I DO love you ... and I DO want your happiness.
And that happiness may not be found here for you.... in reality... it made ME happy having you here.