Hi Prunellar!
You are not alone!
Many of us here have our own issues with food. Whether it happens to just be eating a little too much, up to & including using food as a self-medicating drug. Please don't be ashamed to type what you're feeling here.
You do not need to lose weight to love yourself. In fact, eating healthier... doing more physical activity... takes love. We should love ourselves enough to want to do these things. You are not a failure. Ever. This is a process. A long one. One step at a time, sometimes tiny baby steps, sometimes a step backwards... but as long as we don't give up, we are not failures.
How about beginning with a change you may be able to handle easily? Water. It's wonderful, pure and pretty essential to many food plans. Do you drink sodas, juices or other things? Try drinking water instead. Just for a day. One day. Hey, if a whole day seems like too much, then start with one meal.
Habits take a long time to break, and a long time to build. Be patient with yourself.
You may want to check out the Chicks in Control section. But, please post wherever you're comfortable.
You can do this. All the best of success!