basically i just want to know if my feelings here are in any way justified, or if i'm overreacting. sometimes i can't tell when i'm sane anymore.
i came to OA about 2 months ago now, and really thought it was helpful. it took me a month to work up the courage to ask someone to be my sponsor, but i finally did. i chose someone who was older and responsible, who i thought made a great role model and was stable, blah blah blah.
she was sort of supportive, but nothing extraordinary. i'd have appreciated it if when i was out of contact for a few days, she'd have checked up on me, but she didn't and i guess its my responsibility to take initiative and contact HER anyway.
the thing is, she went away for a week, which she told me in advance. so, great, no prob, and i asked her to contact me when she returned to town. I heard nothing from her for a MONTH. yesterday, she sent me a one-line email that she would be at the OA meeting and hoped to see me there.
i don't know if i would have otherwise gone to the meeting, but i specifically DIDN'T go because I can't deal with seeing her. i don't think i can have her as my sponsor anymore. i feel completely deserted but it was so hard for me to ask someone in the first place, and i can't deal with coming out and saying "i don't want you to be my sponsor anymore."
i don't know... i'm kind of just a mess right now and have been binging for over a week straight.