Will you ever go back to McDonald's, or any fast food place, or Chinese buffet, have birthday cake...any of the dieting evils. I'm not saying I will ever go back to eating the way I used to (fingers crossed)...but someday, when I have my weight and health were I want them to be, I want to be able to have a day every once in awhile where I can go to a family reunion or out to lunch with a friend and now have to order special to make sure I don't get to many calories. Is there anyone else with this thinking or do most people not want to ever eat the stuff they used to again?

I still eat McDonalds, I ate Chinese today...You can incorporate those places NOW if you really carefully choose what you order
Deprivation is not the key to success, moderation is

I decided to not put anything off limits. I just have to learn to control myself when I do have stuff. Like Mary said, moderation, not deprivation. If I thought I would never have chocolate or Chinese food again, I would not be able to do it. Eventually I would give into a binge and lose a lot of progress.

I agree. Moderation is the best weapon in this war.

I eat anything I want but in moderation to prevent a binge and losing all my progress. But I have found that certain things I used to eat I just do not have the appetite for it anymore.

McD's is not my vice of choice, but I definitely still let myself have higher fat/calorie foods on occasion, and I think being able to do this in moderation has been a key to my success - I don't feel like I've been depriving myself of food I want, just making sure that everything is in reasonable quantities, and within my weekly calorie allotment.

I had a friend tell me recently that she wanted to take me out and treat me to "whatever I've been missing" when I get to my goal weight - and I told her there wasn't anything in that category!

McDonald's - probably not (haven't been since July 2004, the day I started). The list of acceptable foods at McDonald's is pretty low to me and the fries would be a huge temptation (I *love* their fries)

Chinese buffet - absolutely, have been many times. Buffets are inherently tricky - all that food! I like value, I like the idea of getting a lot for my money and I love eating, that is a bad combination. Ideally, I want to look at the entire buffet first, to plan what I want. Then, I try to follow a "one plate" rule. Usually, Chinese buffets have vegetable dishes, so I try to focus on those. I don't eat fried foods, so I avoid all the tempura, General Tsao's chicken, etc.

Birthday cake - *MY* birthday - DEFINITELY. I even had cake on my birthday when I was actively losing weight (only 2 "treat" meals during the entire time). Other people's birthdays...well, that's more of a slippery slope. Seems like there's always cake at work for some reason. Sometimes I say no, sometimes I say yes. We had a baby shower today and I had a piece of chocolate cake with fudgy icing, but I worked it into my calorie totals for the day and had a small piece.

Booze - very limited. The occasional glass of red wine, usually in a restaurant with a nice dinner. Never more than 2 glasses.

I am a 2 year+ maintainer, 90% of my food choices are very good and on plan. I have successfully maintained my 70+ lb weight loss within 5 lbs while eating "treats" by using the following techniques:

1. I don't eat: fried foods, fast food, sodas, packaged baked goods. There is absolutely nothing nutritionally redeeming about any of those foods. Some of those foods don't even TASTE very good (waxy packaged cupcakes, for example). It is very easy for me to say "no, I don't eat that." Makes my life simpler.

2. I severely limit the following goods: full fat cheese, booze, home made baked goods, chocolate, red wine. I made a lot of tough decisions when I changed my life. Some food I could happily give up forever and never miss (DQ blizzards - who knew I wouldn't miss them at all?). Other foods, I would have missed - really good dark chocolate, red wine, cakes made by my good friend who's a baker. I had to make a life plan that included these foods, they just have to be occasional treats.

3. I have to order the smallest size of anything "treatlike." Lattes - tall. Ice cream - single scoop, preferable shared. Dessert in a restaurant - must split with a friend. Buffets - take one bite of different desserts.

4. Absolutely no junk in the house. When I was heavy, one of my biggest problems was stopping at one serving. If I opened a bag of oreos, I would take 4, close up the bag, eat the oreo's, go back into the kitchen, open the package, take out 4 more, close the bag, etc etc. House is a junk free zone, completely.

5. Restaurants - plan in ADVANCE what I'm going to get before I even get there and get tempted by the food around me and the glossy menus. Be the imperious goddess that I am and special order whatever I want. Salmon without butter? No fries, double vegetables, no butter, just steamed! No problem, that's what I want. Find "safe" restaurants and suggest them when friends want to go out (brown rice, scallops, spinach at P.F. Chang's? winner!).

6. Forgive myself for eating off plan, get right back to healthy eating with the very next meal opportunity. I used to think "oh wow, I ate cheesecake, the day is ruined, might as well just eat whatever." Now, I understand that life is complicated and our society really revolves around food - it is love, it is companionship, it is acceptance, it is friendship. Sometimes, I eat things I didn't plan to eat - that's okay. What is important is getting RIGHT BACK ON TRACK immediately.

Its a combination of MODERATION and GOOD CHOICES.

Will I ever have a 12 piece chicken nugget value meal or a Big Mac Value Meal at McDonalds? Can't imagine that I will. Will I have a 4 piece chicken nugget kids meal? Maybe - can't rule it out. Will I have a lunch salad there? Sure, if there aren't any other options readily available. Will I have a lowfat ice cream cone there? Absolutely...at least once every couple of weeks for dessert.

Similarly, there are certain circumstances that are "traditional" or "special" to me. I make the drive with my partner to LA maybe 3-4 times per year. Every time, on the way down, we stop at In n Out in Kettleman City and get a cheeseburger and fries. Best choice? No. But its moderate because its only a couple times a year.

Moderation and good choices are the bedrock of being able to eat pretty much anywhere.

I have lost weight many, many times in my life, as much as 70 lbs at a time, but I always eventually got so tired of deprivation that I eventually went off every diet I've been on. This time around, I've decided that I truly want to start eating the way I want to for the rest of my life. I may have to reduce my calorie level at some point, if I stop losing, and want to keep losing. So, anything I want in my life "at some point," I include now. It may take a lot of practice to get it right, and I certainly don't have it down yet, but I'm hoping, actually expecting that by the time I reach goal all of these lifestyle changes will be deeply engrained habits. I'll always have to watch and pay attention to what I eat, but I don't expect the day (or week, month, or year for that matter) before I reach goal to be any different from those afterward.

I think if I ever even think that their will be an "after dieting," I will end up right where I started, if not worse. I think learning how to live a thin life, is like learning any set of skills, like playing an instrument or learning a sport. You can't do it perfectly, on day 1, but you try to get as close as you can, and every day you get a little closer, but if you ever stop, even trying to get better, even after you become a maestro, you can lose the skills, just by not using them.

X

The one thing I've learned after losing weight a number of times is that there are certain foods which set off binges. Fast food and baked goods primarily. Maintenance for me was always believing that because I was now "normal" that I could eat like everybody else. It just wasn't true. If I'm going to keep weight off then I have to accept that I don't have the ability to be moderate when it comes to these items and just not let them be part of my lifestyle.

I have an obsessive personality. This time I'm trying to change things within that framework rather than try to change my basic personality.

"Insanity is endlessly repeating the same behavior, and expecting different results." It isn't reasonable to think you can succeed where you've always failed before, unless you change your behavior. But, when you change your behavior, you still don't always get the results you expect. It's all just part of the trial and error that is learning how to do this.

Anything I plan on eliminating during my losing phase, I have to plan on eliminating during my maintenance as well. And anything I plan on including during maintenance, I better include during my losing phase (now) as well. Even if it's only to find out I've got to eliminate it. I think it's better I learn along the way than get to my goal weight, and think I can start adding back in foods I avoided in order to lose.

I'm still learning which foods are such extreme triggers that I may never be able to ever eat them safely in any amount under any circumstances - which foods are triggers only under certain circumstances - and which foods are perfectly safe all of the time (and foods of all shades in between).

I agree. Mod and good choices. I am out often with friends and coworkers, and I basically know the breakdown of every menu and what I can/not have. I dont deprive, that is what makes my weightloss and diet work for me!!

I like some of McD's salads!

It would be hard for me to go back as fast food is forever connected in my mind to my binges. I would order multiple value meals or hit several fast food places in a row and not be full afterwards and would move on to other high calorie, high fat foods until I was sick. I was so pathetic. It makes me so sad to thing of that version of me. So can I let those things back in my life? I don't think I can and not bring up those horrible emotions that went along with those foods. There are other decadent foods I never binged on that I can imagine having in small amounts infrequently, but I think fast food joints for me are just sources of quick diet cokes or bottled water, not food.