I joined this forum recently and have really learned a lot reading all the advice and information people give each other. So, I was wondering: what's the best advice or information you received from someone at 3FC? (And if you know who gave it -- give them credit!)

As for me, the best (and scariest) information may be been the fact that losing weight might be the "easy" part (which sounds kind of impossible right now!), and that maintaining is where the real challenge is at. This is a reality I did NOT want to confront, but I am starting to come to the realization that I will have to accept that in order to succeed. This info has multiple sources -- everyone over at the Maintainers group!

The best advice I've gotten is to not do now what I won't do in the future to maintain my weight loss. I think that is so, so important. The first time I lost this weight I did it with drastic calorie cuts and an unhealthy amount of exericise. Obviously, that didn't work out so well for me. This time I'm doing what I can do for life thanks to a lot of great advice I've read on these boards. I'm confident I won't be needing to lose this weight a third time. Good luck, and welcome!

I used to think that in order to be 'thin again', I had to maniacly do something drastic for a short amount of time and then I'd be able to go back to normal.
I've learned here (from too many wonderful members to even try to name them all) that if I want to be fit and slender for the rest of my life ... I need to change my life-style.
I've learned that being well toned at 125 lbs is healthier and easier to maintain than simply getting down to 125 lbs. at any cost.
I've learned that I can learn from successful losers as well as those who have struggled. We do indeed learn from each others mistakes.

The most important thing I've learned? We all feel a need to be special in some way. My situation, my build, my height, my age, my economic strata, a health challenge and so on. Unfortunately we sometimes take these 'gifts' and turn them into reasons why we are crippled instead of reasons why we are wonderfully unique. At 3fc there are dozens of folks enough 'like me' that I cannot feel alone. However, I am, indeed, the only one of me there is. (Y'all stop sayin' praise the Lord for that )

It would be easier for me to lose weight if I was younger, richer, more athletic ... but I'm not. I have been equipped with this body. It may not be muscular nor a calorie burning machine ... and that may not be fair. However, it's what I've got. I have to learn to run it.

The adage "eat less and move more" is true, no exceptions. However, there are no magic numerical formulae for how much less and how much more. Since this is my incredibly unique machine, I have to learn to eat less for me and move more than me.

MY best advice was: There is no magic bullet!!! If there was every one would be thin. Oprah said, on one of her shows, "if there was a magic potion I would have it, I would give up all my money and I would have it".

Another wise saying "this is not a dress rehersal. This is the only life you have".

The best advice I got about my weight was not from this forum, it was from my doctor who was about to retire. I developed high blood pressure when I turned 40, I'd been having problems with my lower back, knees and feet-arthritis.

He sat me down and said honestly, "honey, you are only 5' tall and only 40 years old. You don't want these problems. If you don't change how you are eating and what you are doing, we'll probably be replacing your knees by the time you are 50 if you haven't had a stroke by then. Have you seen young people after they've had a stroke? Do you really want that to be you? You have got to lose the weight, you have got to make lifestyle changes so that it will stay off. " He went on to give me referrel to see the nutritionist.

I left his office in tears, determined to do something this time. Hey, it worked. Scared straight. I guess it worked this time because the doctor acted like he really cared and that it bothered him that I might not be around to see old age. Most doctors just throw the "lose weight" order out like they could care less.

Then the nutritionist said:

Pick a diet you can live with because you will be on it for the rest of your life. This is not something you go on to lose the weight then go back to your regular way of eating, this is a permenant changing of your eating habits.

Then at the end, she made me promise to do 10 wall pushups and 20 crunches in the morning. I had to say," I will do this in the morning." not I'll try, but I will. It was interesting.

Sarah

This isn't advice I've been given but something I've picked up on as a memeber of 3fc.

BE ACCOUNTABLE!

I've always found it helpful to keep track of what I eat and how much I exercise. One of the major differences between my failed attempts to lose weight and this one is that, in the past, I wasn't always honest with myself. I would usually log every morsel but on "bad" days, I wouldn't record everything. A binge type episode NEVER got journaled. I'd ignore that it happened and start again the next day. The problem was that by not acknowledging the behavior I allowed myself to let it creep ever so gradually back into my life. Before long I'd have gained any lost weight and be back to eating what I wanted, when I wanted, how much I wanted, and without a thought of starting over. It was NEVER a conscious decision to stop trying to lose weight.

These days it is different. With the exception of one week of vacation when I didn't have access to fitday and the 3 days we were without electricity after Katrina every single bite I've put in my mouth has been logged. And, even on those days I was very aware of what I was putting in my mouth and had a mental tally of how much I had eaten. When I overeat - whether it is just going over my calorie allotment or a full blown binge - I face it. I put it in fitday and I accept responsibility for it. So, when it is all said and done I've got no reason to beat myself up about the occasional slip. I've owned my decision to indulge and that allows me to move on guilt free.

I realize now that it was never really my going off plan that I felt guilty about-that is going to happen from time to time. It was the cover up. I felt as bad and worthless being dishonest with myself as I would have had I lied to a friend. And maybe that's the second part of my being successful this time around - I am AT LEAST as good to myself as I am to other people, sometimes BETTER. I don't think or say anything about myself that I wouldn't be willing to say to someone else. Keeping a positive attitude about myself takes some work but it is well worth the effort.

I have been plagued forever by impatience and frustration with my body. I was poking through old posts and just catching up with everyone, and I found a marvelous quote by our own jawsmom:

"I reminded myself often that the only sure way NOT to reach my goal was to quit all together"

It was a good, solid reminder, and it helps me to refocus when energy is wanning. Thanks, jawsmom!

The most important things I've learned are:

1. It doesn't end when you get to goal. This is forever. I know that I can never go back to eating and living the way I was if I hope to remain healthy and fit for the rest of my life, period.

2. When you mess up (yes "when", 'cause it's gonna happen) it's not an excuse to throw in the towel. Learn from your mistakes, put your indiscretions behind you, and get right back on plan with your very next meal. This is life now; you've got to go with the flow. So, you're late picking your kid up from school, do you say, "oh well, it's too late now" and just head home instead? If you forget to feed the fish does that mean you don't have to feed them tomorrow? No, you keep right on going and try not to do it again. So what makes taking care of your body by eating right and exercising any different?

Great thread Wyllenn, thanks for starting it!

Beverly

jawsmom pretty much said what i had to say...logging what you eat and when you exercise is extremely helpful. Fitday is a great tool...I used to use an excel spreadsheet, but fitday is much more user friendly and makes nifty reports!

MrsJim as well as the other mods always have amazing advice, too!

Together with the do something you can do for life thing, my big one would be that the only diet or exercise plan that's right is the one that's right for you. It doesn't matter if I've lost 70lb by doing one thing, or someone else has lost 100lb on Atkins or whatever, if you can't stick to it, then that plan won't work for you. If you find something that seems to go against someone else's rules but it still works for you, then do it. Don't worry about which exercise is best, do the exercise that you enjoy. Doing something less strenuous more often is better than intending to do something really fantastic but never getting round to it. If you want to go with a programme (food or exercise) that someone's given you then fine, if it gives you structure, but if you need to adapt it to suit your needs then that doesn't automatically mean that you're doomed to failure, it means you're taking responsibility for what you put into your body, and learning to do it alone for the rest of your life.

I don't feel qualified to say which advice is best since I have been the exact same weight for 9 years! Even with diet changes and lots of exercise.

Sarah, I know what you mean about doctors. Once many many years ago my doctor was on leave and I asked the substitute what I should do to lose weight. As she walked out the door she tossed out, "Eat less and exercise".

I have been seeing a nutritionist for more than a year now and she is great. Supportive and encouraging and a physician to boot! (most nutritionists aren't doctors) She is baffled as to why I am not losing. Well, OK, I have lost about 4 lbs but I consider that the "same weight". I am so disciplined with my eating and so disciplined with my exercise I don't get it either but I won't give up!

The best advice for me was:

Be persistent; and
Try lifting weights.

"Weight training."

...is the BEST advice I ever got. This wasn't something I learned from 3FC, but I see that advice everywhere around here, too.

If I could say just ONE THING to every single woman on 3FC, it's ADD WEIGHT TRAINING TO YOUR PLAN. I can't stress it enough -- it's the best thing I ever did for myself, and has made losing weight easier than it ever was before.

Please, try it! You'll see great results and I bet you'll love it as much as I do!

Oooops....I just started GIVING advice...whoopsie, I guess I'm off-topic now!

The best advise for me was:

- This is a lifestyle, forever and ever AMEN!! I now accept that.
- You are only 2 hours away from a healthy/clean meal when you've screwed up
- Be consistent, eat healthy and exercise EVEN on weekends.
- Don't wait for Monday to start, do it NOW
- Don't berate yourself or use negative thoughts, be your own best friend.
- On exercising --- JUST DO IT DAMNIT!!

Oooh, I forgot about weight training! Doh!

IMO, every woman who wants to tone up and lose some pounds, NEEDS to take up some kind of weight training. And it doesn't have to be a lot, I started out with just 3 lb. weights and only use 5 lb. weights now. But it makes such a huge difference. Awesome suggestions everybody, keep 'em coming!

Beverly