So, I've been doing so well for the 4 and a half days that I've been on Phase 1. I turned my mom down for karaoke tonight because I can't go to a bar and not drink beer (especially if they want me to sing in front of people.) So I figured that was the end of it.

Until Dad called. "Daddy's on vacation! Sing Daddy a song!" aaaaagggggghhhhh. And after the day I've had today, a beer sounds REALLY good. Dad is very manipulative and I know that he works nights and I know that he never gets vacation time because of his job and so he very rarely gets to hear me sing at karaoke. He'll give me the "you won't go out with your dear old dad" and then go into the "I'm not going to live forever" speech. (His dad died at 61, and my dad is 59 now, so he seems to think he's going to die young too, even though he's usually pretty healthy.)

The crazy thing is that HE IS ON SOUTH BEACH, TOO! I feel like I have Tourette's Syndrome, the way filth is spewing from my mouth. I had a really bad day at work and just wanted to unwind with a beer, but I didn't. Now, I'm being guilted into it.

Anybody know anything to drink that would be better for me than lite beer? I mean, besides Michelob Ultra (yarf.) Would wine be better for me? I know alcohol is not allowed at all on Ph1, but it's going to happen, I just want to drink the healthiest unhealthy thing I can.

Sorry to let you guys down. I'm caving to dear ol dad.

Don't fall off! You just posted to me about this!! Stay tough. Go out and have fun but forget the beer. Drink a Diet Coke. You'll thank yourself later...after you come off the craving. Just think about how you'll feel about it tommorrow. Good luck. -Ashley

Weezle, hon, this is your decision. It all comes down to what one of the mods has in her signature: "If you want it, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse." You can either use your dad's manipulation as an excuse to drink beer, or you can find a way to accomodate your dad and not blow Phase 1. Drink a diet soda, drink water...buy a decadent decaf skinny latte with SF syrup at a coffee shop on the way there and drink that. But DON'T drink alcohol, or you'll be starting P1 all over again, hon.

The truth is, there will ALWAYS be situations like this in your life. If you keep giving in, you'll never make the life changes necessary to be more healthy. Stand up for yourself and what you want. Set a new path...one that says you don't have to drink just because you're in a bar...that you can sing without alcohol because you're singing for your dad. You can do whatever you put your mind to, girl...I know it!!!

Weezle, if you're lucky, your Dad will be around for a long time. It's time to start taking charge and stop giving in! Just because your Dad is lacking in willpower doesn't mean that you should let go of yours, too.
Get a diet coke... your Dad will still love you, hon.

Well, I'm most certainly going to try to behave. You girls just don't know how terrified I get singing in front of a bar full of people without those first 2 beers in me. My leg starts shaking and then I have to lock my knees and then I remember to stop because if you lock your knees, you pass out.... I'm a decent singer and I've been doing it a lonnnnng time, I just can't get over it.

If I drink anything, it'll have to be water. Diet coke will keep me up all night long. I just hope I don't cave under the pressure. Dad drinks on Friday nights and is still losing weight, lucky . Mom does too, but not near as much as Dad.



(Sorry. Just trying to remind myself that beer is what got me here in the first place.)

Wish me luck. I'll let you know how I do. Thanks for your support girls.

(P.S. Throw a party! Another bathroom celebration! )

Good luck! Stay strong! Try drinking seltzer water with a twist of lemon and pretending it's a cocktail?

Weezle,

We got tired of Ultra to after awhile. Have you tried Miller Lite? I like Strawberry Daquairies (sp?).. not sure if they are allowed though. No alcohol is legal on phase 1 though. I am not sure what would be best. But I suppose if you eat well before hand, and only have one or two and be strict maybe you can slack off tonight. Just don't have to many.

Tracy,

Alcohol isn't allowed in Phase 1. Neither is fruit (so no virgin daquiris either). Plus most mixers are laden with sugar. And in the SBD book, Dr. Agatston says that the sugar from malt is about the worst of all the sugars, so beer is definitely not good on any phase. I think wine is the only alcohol that he approves of - but not in Phase 1. It's only 2 weeks, so I hope Weezle can get through the night!

Heather,

Right... I know it is not allowed in phase 1. And I believe it is even limited in phase 2. But instead of beating herself up later she can do things to allow one or two drinks and then get refocused. I feel that would be better then feeling like you have punished yourself. I have seen many fail on there diets because of those things. Just a thought.

Weezle - Oh girl...I know you can do this! You've committed yourself to completing phase I...it's not too much longer and you can have that wine. I sing karaoke also and was SO SCARED that first time I went to the bar and had water to drink...the thing is, I made it, and you can too hun.

Tracy - Please excuse me while I step back onto my soapbox. What exactly IS punishment to you? Is it deciding to stick to a plan that you know will hold a WORLD of wonderful benefits for you? Or is it punishment to continue allowing yourself 'a little here and a little there' and then wonder why it is that you can't seem to get the scale to move? The fact is simple here...It's alcohol, and it's not allowed on phase I. We can fool ourselves and enable ourselves to fail...we have that power of persuasion with our selfish minds. It's one thing to make a mistake, address it, and move forward...it's a completely different story to tell a person who hasn't even gone astray yet that a little bit is okay. Think about that for a moment...that's called food pushing to most of us. A little bite wont kill you is such an evil sentence...one bite leads to another. This is a WOE for the long haul and we're building a strong foundation with the first two weeks of this plan.

Wow, I'm probably out of line there...but I feel very strongly about this.

Val, I'm with you.

Tracy,

I wasn't sure if you knew or not, since you had expressed confusion over the rules in another post. I wanted to be sure you knew.

(on ) As for punishing, no one should ever punish themselves over what they eat. It's food. Our body needs food. However, we should not be enslaved to food. We should be able to make a plan to eat healthfully and stick to it, especially if it is only a short time. I know that is easier said than done, and believe me, I have my temptations too.

I'll be sad if Weezle has to start all over again, but that's better than just giving up! Whatever she does, we all want to be there to support her. But we also want to encourage her to stick to her decision to be healthy. We are her friends here, and we always want the very best for our friends! (off )

My secret!!! I go and sing almost every week!!! I drink tomato juice with slices of lime and 2 green olives!! Yum!!!!
Then, I wait until about 11:30 or 12:00 to sing...almost everyone there is drunk a lready and you can sing to your hearts content!!!

Shortiemetoo - that sounds like a yummy OP mocktail! I'll have to try that some time (DH and I don't drink, anyway).

For a time, DH made himself a virgin bloody mary from V8, celery seed, tobasco, Worcestershire sauce, and I think an olive and/or cocktail onion (I think that's everything) - he used to drink them often, but I guess he must have gotten tired of them or something. I used to drink ginger ale on the rocks in an old-fashioned (looked just like my old stand-by scotch and soda on the rocks), but no more of that! Mostly I just drink water now. Or tea.

Ok... I hope this message turns out the way that I am trying to type it and that I do not upset anyone by miss wording it some how. I have been known to miss word things... that were good... but miss understood before. That's what happens when you have to much on your mind, 3 kids running around, and everything else lol.

I have read in several different books and also heard it on tv that if you deny yourself something that it could possibly backfire on you. You see... my problem is not eating, over eating, or anything like that. I am one who does not eat! I have always only eaten dinner and a snack after that while watching tv. So it might be different for others who like to eat. But I also know people who like to eat a lot and if they deprive themself of something it backfires on them every time! Sometimes they pig out later on the wrong things because of it!

Anyway, I read and saw on tv that you shouldn't do that (I know SBD says no on phase 1). One bite will give you a taste and many will be satisfied. Or one drink in this matter. I am not much of a drinker so who knows for sure on this one. I personally would rather have a diet coke with splenda or a cup of coffee lol.

The first time (the last time) I did SBD I had great success! But, I also allowed myself a bite when needed. For example at a funeral we went to there was desert and pop for drinks. I did take a desert, however I only had a bite! That was enough to satisfy my taste buds. And all they had was regular pop to drink (water was well and I was not drinking that!) so I had a cup of that. It did not hurt my weigh in! I made sure I exercised and ate right all other times. I had great success then on the plan!

I am just stating here what I have read and heard. And also what I have used in the past. Like Weezle said... her dad is doing SBD, still drinks on Friday's, and is still having successful weight loss! It is all different with each person.

I hope everyone understands what I am trying to say here. And I hope I didn't come across as rude or anything. And I hope it all made since because my husband was being ignorant and kept talking to me in the background lol.