What we really want in a weight loss support group, boils down to one concept; we are looking for a sanctuary.

Sanctuary means different things to different people. Sanctuary is a place of peace, rest, safety, and rejuvenation. It keeps our spirit and our sanity intact.

Many of us who have a long journey down the weight loss path find ourselves in need of a break. Sometimes our bodies crave it, and sometimes the choice isn't ours, but circumstances forces it upon us. Other times, we need the clamoring throng to cheer us along our way as we breeze past milestones and overcome obstacles.

Sanctuary can be all that as well. It is what you need and when you need it. Sanctuary can be found in good friends who aren’t afraid of your truths and in an open, honest atmosphere.

Sanctuary isn’t judgmental, neither does it discriminate or ask to be censured. It is open to anyone with a desire to share, and especially those in need of and willing to offer support

Kat and Gloria: I was thinking that if we all got web cams we could belly dance together!!!

Tricia: I live in a small rural area and was in town with one of my nieces one day when a elderly lady came in the store we were in with those pink rollers in her hair. My niece asked what that lady had on her head - she is 12 years old so I explained they were rollers - she looked at me like both the pink roller and lady and ME were aliens.

I have never had children but your post to Andria was so moving, thanks for sharing with us.

Ahh, Andria, don't ya know we are here for you? This is our Sanctuary, after all. I don't believe grieving ever ends, maybe with time it's a little easier - but never ends. My Mother died 30 years ago and I started to cry while typing this.

Cheryll: After that toning class it sounds like you will have Pamela Anderson Legs!!!

O.K., i am going crazy here. I have got to know how you put the belly dancer in your post Lucky. My son is a computer programer, so when he was down for a visit a couple of days ago, i asked him to help me figure it out. Now my son is a very smart young man and even he didn't know how to put something like that belly dancer in a post. I have a MAC. computer so maybe that is why i cant figure it out. Please, Please tell me before i go completely nuts.
Gloria

Gloria, the instructions for putting graphis in a post is very easy. The olny hitch is you have to have a hosting site to host your graphics. You can't post from your hard drive, or your computer. There are several hosting sites around. The one I use most is ripway.com, but photobucket.com and villagephotos.com are a couple of other one. The are for the most part free.
Once you have signed up for a hosting site you upload you graphics from you domputer (instructions on the site, also easy) Then when you want to put them in your post all you do is click on the little postcard icon ( the little yellow box with a mountian on it right under the arrow on the size box. Then if you are in the Guided Mode a box will appear and you just copy the URL of you graphic and it is inserted automatically. If you are in the Enchanted Mode when you click the postcard icon you will see the prompt [IMG] then you copy the url here and click the Close Current Tag and you have your picture.

But warning the fun part is looking for graphics, it can be very addicting.

Hey everyone

The sun is shining outside! Ok, it really isn't (looks like rain), but if it did happen to be, I would be able to see it.

Tricia, thank you for sharing your story. I felt so much better just after writing that post, but your reply felt very special. It normally isn't this hard on me, in fact, I've been able to help a few other mothers in similar situations the last couple of years. Still, sometimes it builds up, and there is no way to run and hide from that pain when it does.

Now, all of you are probably going to think I am a huge whiny dork, but after writing here yesterday I went about doing stuff around the house and thinking about how I felt, etc. I stumbled upon the rest of what has been bothering me, and I came to a solution and an understanding. Wow, it felt so good!

As much as the other things have been bothering me, it didn't make sense in my head or heart that I have been staying away from 3FC. I love it here, and I miss my friends when I am away.

There was a situation a bit ago on another thread where some people were hurt and angry with me over something going on in my personal life. A member of that thread wrote to me and told me that these people were incredibly hurt and didn't want me posting there any longer. I was devastated. I had been open and honest with them, and no one had let me know there was a problem. I stopped posting there immediately, but the fact that someone else was in pain because of my actions has troubled me ever since. I really haven't been able to get it off my mind and have been trying to come up with some way to make up for it or ease their burden.

Well, what I realized yesterday is that I can't do that for them. I was not the original cause of their pain, even if my situation might have been a reminder. I cannot hold myself responsible for their reaction. I can't own their problem for them; it doesn't work that way. I can still feel sorrow, but nothing I do will ease their way. That path is for them to find.

I guess that sounds kind of weird, but it was a total epiphany for me, and I had to share. I seriously feel 10 lbs. lighter since yesterday afternoon, and it seems as if my little spark is rekindling.

So, enough bizarre posting from Andria for right now. I'm soooooo tired and there are still a few things left to do to be ready for this trip. I don't leave until tomorrow afternoon though, so hopefully there will be time for a "regular" post from me.

Andria

I HATE COMPUTERS!!!
So i tried to down load a picture of my dog Sky Blue and all i got was this. [/IMG]URL: http://home.ripway.com/2005-2/258262/Roll1-5.jpg

Andria, i was also in a different thread before coming to Sanctuary. I felt alone, and like i was talking to myself. I can be a strong person when i have to be, but i was hurt that these people would not respond to my post. I felt like i was invisible. I found myself first trying to change my personality to make these people like me. THAT was a stupid thing to do on my part. Your personality is what makes you, you. We may not all agree on others opinions, but isn't that why we are here. To talk, to laugh at ourselves and to help each other get throu all the ups and downs of what life throes at us. That thread that you were in before was wrong to ask you to leave. You have good friends now that care about you and want to hear what you have to say. As one weird person to another, i say po po on them. There loss, our gain.
Gloria

I did it!!! Happy dance for me.

Andria, you've got exactly the right attitude. Good for you. Everything that Gloria said: DITTO!

Gloria, my husband Greg is a jack of all trades guy. He majored in English and was a teacher for a while but he's also a self-taught computer guru. Once he figured out that teaching wasn't for him he started a career in IT. He's an RF engineer now but I help him keep his computer skills sharp. It is like having my own personal help line. Isn't it great having a computer geek around the house - especially a cute one? Still, every now and then I like to figure something out that he can't do. Good for you getting those graphics down! You've done your son proud.

Okay, I think I'm going to need a lot of moral support in the next couple of weeks. I feel a plateau coming on. Or that inevitable slow down if not a full blown plateau. I know they are just par for the course while losing weight but that doesn't make them any less frustrating. The scale is the devil - I'm convinced of it.

Speaking of scales, here's a funny story. All of the kids like to get on and weight themselves. I have a digital one that calculates BMI so there is lots of beeping when you get on and I think that is what attracts them to it. Anyway, the other day they were getting on one by one and asking, "how much do I weigh?" Well, Will hops on and I decide I'll incorporate some of what he's learning in kindergarten and make him tell me what the numbers are. He gets them right so I step up to see if he can figure out my numbers. The weight comes up and I say, "Okay, Will, how much do I weigh?" He looks at the numbers, then looks at me, then looks at the numbers again before looking up and answering, "TOO MUCH!" Humph, guess they haven't gotten past 100 in class yet.

We are off to the lake to feed the ducks. It is really to cold for it but we've been cooped up in the house because of the rain. It is at least sunny today so I'm not going to miss the opportunity to enjoy a little of it.

Hope you all have a great day.

Tricia

Andria:
A M E N

Gloria: Your a weirdo too, huh. I guess we just all have to stick together.

BarbG: Thanks for giving Gloria the posting scoop.

Tricia: I you need moral support you have come to the right place. The scale is the devil - hmmm I always thought it was M & M's.

Kat: Where are you???? Talk!!!!!

Cheryll, BarbPa, Skit - Come out and play!!!!

I won't even mention Andria and Tony since they are having a weekend together! Andria never did mention what they were doing?


What's everyones plans for Valentine's??

And good friends to cry with! I just have to thank you all for your support and your honesty and love. This is truly a SANCTUARY. I love it here and I love you all!

First of all. Andria and Tricia. Wow. I don't know what to say except I'm so sorry that you had to go through such sadness. You are both strong, remarkable women and I thank you for sharing your stories.

Andria...I am SO GLAD that the light bulb went off in your head about making other people happy. You can bend over backwards and tie yourself in knots, stand on your head and spit wooden nickels for them, and the self important, sanctimonious people of the world will always find something that offends their delicate sensibilities. The way I see it, it's their loss that you're gone. A HUGE loss. This thread's gain. End of story. But keep up the bizarre posting! It clears your head. Really!

Gloria said it all: Vive la difference! We are all so different, and yet so alike in so many ways.

Lucky...You wouldn't be able to dance if you saw me on your webcam! You'd be laughing too hard!

I'd love to stay and type away, but I've got one more night of work before I'm off for three glorious days. My clouds seem to be lifting just knowing I don't have to do the little sleep/ lots o' work shuffle for a few days.

Thanks again to all...I know I didn't respond to everyone, but I think of you all and appreciate you being here.

One more thing...Andria and Tony...HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!

Last week when Carl and i were on vacation i kinda gained a little weight. O.k., i gained a lot of weight so decided to do double duty at the Y. Went to water aerobic class on Sun, Mon and Wed, (Son was here on Tuesday). Anyway, went food shopping today, and as I'm driving to the store i noticed my stomach is not resting on my leg quite as much as it usually does. I don't have a scale so i cant tell if I've lost any. There is a scale at the Y but i have to wait till no one is around to use it. I will keep you posted on the stomach thing.
Gloria

Hi everyone!

Gotta make this a quick one and get to work. I had to work over last night so I haven't had a chance to get on the puter (I like to say that instead of computer)
but when I weighed myself I had lost another pound. Bonus for working over, got paid to lose weight! I like that!

Anyway, Gloria, I feel like a real moron, I haven't even been able to figure out the weight tracker yet. Duh? So it goes.

And Andria, I'm so glad your at this thread. You seem honest and sincere. I respect your honesty. This is one place we should be able to confide and be ourselves.

Well, I need to get going, tonight we are going to Chuckie Cheese to celebrate my grandson's 4th birthday. I need to stay strong this weekend and not sabatage (sp)
my weightloss. Weekends are horrible on the whole eating thing. Anyway, have a great day all.

cheryll

Hello Beautiful People,

I was going to log on last night but hubby was on the puter playing games. Well he has been working overtime so I let him have his little fun. Well, time to reply to you wonderful peoples.

First off Andria and Tricia, Those are sad stories and I am glad that you shared them. I feel your loss in a way that some day if I can ever talk about it you will know.

but the fact that someone else was in pain because of my actions has troubled me ever since. I really haven't been able to get it off my mind and have been trying to come up with some way to make up for it or ease their burden.They were in pain because of their own situation. They have to learn to deal with it because what is going on in your life has nothing to do with them and they are going to come across people, situations, and other things that are going to remind them of what has happened. That is how we learn to cope. I think they were judging you for their situation and that was wrong. We all are here on earth to learn and perfect our souls and each one of us has a different path to follow. We can not walk in someone else's shoes, so we must remember to think that their path may be as bumpy as our own if not bumpier.

One thing you have learned from this is who your friends really are, and well, to be honest, so have I. I believe it was Kat who once had a quote that said "Be who you are and say what you feel. Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter."
I have that quote posted at my desk at work. I smile everytime I look at it.
So Be who you are cause I for one love that person.

Tricia, I loved the story of your son, that is just great, kids do say the darnedest things.

Gloria, that is the problem, you have Mac. It's always nice to blame the puters. I totally believe they have minds of their owns and do things just to drive us users a little insane. But not enough to make us want to stop using them forever. Because they turn around and do these miraculous things that make our life easier. Darn things.
By the way, I'm glad you decided to join us here, and didn't get deterred from trying another thread.

Kat, a good cry always helps. But this time of year is always depressing, can't go outside as much, it's cold and dreary. I have considered getting a sun lamp, those are suppose to help lift some of the depressing blues that come during the winter. Every little bit helps I believe. I'm glad you have three days off. Do something fun for yourself. Heck, do something fun for me and tell me what I did.

Cheryl, I love Chuckie Cheese, I don't have any children, but I love to go there. I just love watching all the other little kids and I love getting the tickets out of the skee ball machines. Have fun!

Lucky, it's cold outside, can we play inside instead?

Lucky...You wouldn't be able to dance if you saw me on your webcam! You'd be laughing too hard! Laughing is very good exercise for your belly. I think that would be a fun idea. But then again, I too am a weirdo.

Gotta go to work,
Skitt