I'm hoping that I can hear some words of wisdom from people who have struggled with the same issue I am. For years I have been a closet eater. My eating habits are pretty healthy when I'm around other people, but I binge when I'm alone. Car eating is a pretty serious problem for me because who will know if I go through the drive through on the way home from work? I'm also in a danger zone when my husband is gone from home for more than an hour or two. Yesterday, he was gone for most of the day and all I did was eat.

What's scariest about it is that it's not at all spontaneous - - my binge yesterday was completely premeditated. I thought long and hard in advance about everything I wanted to eat knowing that he had different plans from me.

Not to get to psychology-based on this website, but this is a behavior that has deep roots in me. I remember sneaking food as a child and eating it alone in my room.

What is it about closet eating that I can't seem to get past? If you've struggled with this too and have found ways to start to tackle this problem, I'd love to hear from you.

Howdy all,

Man, oh, man! You've been peeking in my windows! Admit it, now.

This has been a sore spot for me for years. Now less than before, thanks to the support of these kind folks.

But I used to hide my snacks in a cabinet reserved for storing tupperware. Talk about premeditated. My hubby wouldn't even know it was there in the first place. And, yeah, I've planned those binges. And eaten til I felt even more wretched.

God said a word to me a year ago. "Enough". And it is truly enough, to know He loves me and wants the best for me in all aspects of life.

With the love of good friends, encouragement and support from the forums here, and dedication on my part, the destructive behaviour is on the way out. It isn't easy, but you have to realize that you are truly killing yourself and it is time to stop.

You CAN do this. You ARE worth it.

"Enough" is a good way to put it, I think. I used to closet binge a lot. I finally just said that I would not do it anymore. I use the Weight Watchers plan to lose weight and if I eat something, I track it. Stop doing this to yourself. It will only make you miserable. You are worth much more than that. Take care of yourself, because if you don't, who will?

Brian

First of all -- WELCOME. Keep logging in at this site and at others around the web. It will be a great source of inspiration.

You are not alone and this is nothing to be embarrassed about. I have been a closet eater for most of my life and will always have that inclination. Had an episode this weekend. I have been pretty good about it since I started in June 2000 without much incident. Just lately as I'm getting close to goal and it is surfacing it's ugly head again. I need to figure out where this is coming from and take care of it once and for all if I'm going to get to goal and stay there forever. Right now I'm going to dig for some info and do some self-reflection and journaling. If that doesn't work, I'll probably seek some therapy to help me find out. I didn't work this hard to go back to square one.

My advice for you as you are starting out: gather as much information as possible about your weight loss journey, attend WW meetings faithfully, realize that you are worth it and only you are in charge of your life. A good book would be Life Strategies by Phil McGraw. He takes a no nonsense approach to your life and has some great words of wisdom. Another would be It's Not About Food, I forgot the author.

Please feel free to email me if you want an email buddy to discuss in private.

Dear ForReal,

Sorry for taking so long to respond - couldn't get to this screen last time I looked at your posting.

I was intrigued by one of your statements, "...I thought long and hard in advance about everything I wanted to eat knowing that he had different plans from me. "

What did you mean by, "he had different plans from me"? Do you mean your husband? If so, could it be that you are rebelling against someone else's plans for you? I sure would be inclined to do so too.

You might want to examine why you're attempting a weight loss program and who you're doing it for...for "him" or for YOU!

Best of luck and strength. We're all in this together.

While seeing a counselor for a different issue, we touched on my weight loss battle. She suggested a journal with what I was feeling at each time I ate. It helped me to see that I was an emotional eater, and tried to hide it by bingeing alone.

This really helped me, and the weight is coming off slowly but surely. I think I heard "Enough", too!

All the best to you, and I'm glad you're with WW and 3FC (Lots of support in both places!)