WELCOME!!

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support, inspiration, and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone (roosters as well as chicks!) to join us in our journey. We share laughter and tears, heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations. We also share what works for us and what doesn't.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group... we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us!

Happy happy happy New Year, one and all! I appended below my last posting in the December thread, in case you missed it. Bob and I had a pleasant celebration: listening to some of our favorite blues albums in bed together, then downstairs in time to watch the ball drop in our very own time zone—ha! =grin= A bottle of inexpensive bubbly plus cheez-n-crackers, and two rowdy adolescent kitties, and a good time was had by all.

My biggest good news: for about two weeks now, I've been able to crawl up the stairs on hands and knees (no easy feat!), which means I've been sleeping in my own bed next to my husband, taking showers instead of those ghastly sponge baths in front of the kitchen sink, and best of all, getting to my collage studio.

My current project is making a batch of collage postcards to send to all my missing-in-action correspondents and hopefully re-ignite those relationships. Only two people wondered what had happened to me and kept sending mail over the long summer doldrums and the long autumn of painful rehab. Oh well...

I would like to weigh myself today, but it's a bit of a hassle for Bob to set up my scale, so we'll see... Poor Bob has suffered a lot as a result of all my suffering, but he's loyally driven me and my wheelchair to Bethesda (45-60 minutes, one way) twice and sometimes three times a week for my various appointments. I made a rather odd decision in September, which was to go only with Qi Gung (a broad term encompassing all of Chinese medicine) for my rehab. It hasn't been easy for my very Western brain to deal with the truly weird ideas of the East about the human body, but QG works... so what the hey. I have a great deal of faith in Mike, my instructor/healer, and he has repaid my faith by working hard to get me up and moving. I can stand up readily now and even walk several steps, all without holding onto anything.

The biggest problem in my rehab is PAIN. Everything from the hips on down, plus occasionally my arms, tortures me quite a bit, several times a day. I recently consulted a chronic pain specialist, and he has some ideas. We shall see... So far I've made it through, even dealt with a broken rib from a fall, without any prescription pain killers. I'm not especially proud of that: it just is what it is.

More news later... plus some personal greetings if I can manage it.... I love you guys! I really know that now, since I missed our little community most keenly.
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[posted December 31, I think]

Howdy, y'all! I'm back. Or at least I hope I am. I'm in a whole lot of pain today, so I won't write much. I just wanted to say that I read all the December posts, and am glad to see so many familiar faces: Ubee, Sam, Betsy, Terra, Melissa, Larry...

You were right, Sam, in what you said earlier in the month: I did fall off the planet. As some of you may recall, back in March the psych drugs I was taking for my bipolar disorder caused a massive screwup in my neurotransmitter metabolism, and I got something called serotonin toxicity. It causes rapidly repeating involuntary contractions of the muscles of the arms and legs—very painful, and in my case, very disabling. By the time I was off all the drugs that had screwed me up, I was in the situation of not being able to stand up, walk, drive, or climb stairs. Plus I went into a massive depression caused by withdrawing from those drugs.

I don't remember when I stopped posting here. I apologize for just disappearing and not explaining anything. Somewhere around early May I just lay down on the futon in our living room and became a totally horizontal lousy excuse for a human being, for four long months. I didn't see my doctors. I didn't do physical therapy. Worst of all, I stopped seeing Mike, my Qi ("chee") Gung instructor.

Finally, in mid-September, I pulled out of that deep funk. My muscles had wasted so much from those months of immobility, it was just ridiculous. Even my butt was noticeably flat!

Anyway, as I said, I'm in pain as I write these words, so that's all for now. My weight as posted is not accurate, because I lost so much muscle bulk, and thus lost some weight—the wrong way. As soon as I can manage it, I'll update my numbers and my ticker. I just wanted to say "Hi" to all of y'all.

Happy 2016 my friends!
Fi I am so happy that you are alive! It is so good to hear from you! I know it has been rough but I sense a positive energy flowing from your post. You must feel like a new woman being able to take a shower. I don't think it is odd that you have chosen to go with Qi Gung. I've been dealing with Western Medicine lately and I am more convinced then ever that nature holds all our answers. I have to ask how are the kitties?
Betsy ready to make this year the year to get below 300?
Sam do you have a goal for this year?
Terra what about you?
What about everyone else? Not a resolution, more like a commitment.

I am going to work hard this year to actually make exercise a priority along with healthy eating. My body is telling me through pain, shortness of breath, moods, and difficulty moving because of all the rolls, that I need to get healthy.
So glad to have such a supportive community. Thanks everyone!

Jeez, it happens to all of us, doesn't it? I just wrote a bunch of personals, which seemed to take forever, and then made the mistake of editng my ticker....and lost all that I had written. Arrrrrggh! Well, better luck next time...

Bob set up the scale for me. I weigh 259 lbs., which is 10 down from the last time I weighed myself. And it's not muscle loss, either, because I'm doin' my 600 leg raises, 100 butt crunches, and other exercises (like crawling up the stairs on hands & knees), mostly on a daily basis.

And guess what—I made my third mini-goal: getting down to 260. I completely forgot about that mini-goal until I saw it there in my signature file. So now I have a new mini-goal to work toward: get ready 240, 'cause here I come! =smile=

Ubee ~ I'm just gonna continue working on my weight loss and water in take

Thanks for the invite Ubee Hi everyone! I am back on the bandwagon again, after having some pretty big health issues that forced me to put my weight loss journey on hold. I don't think I have gained much if any weight since stopping however I really want to start trying again.

I aim to walk 3-4 times a week to start off with, and I am on a pretty simple eating plan. It is pretty similar to the CSIRO Diet, and I did well on it when I first started.

I am 26 and I have struggled with my weight my whole life. I also have hormonal issues that make losing weight a bit harder. I have failed every single time I have tried to lose weight and I really struggle with negative self talk, and Ubee suggested I join this chat as a source of motivation and support.

Fingers crossed that 2016 brings good health and positive lifestyle changes for everyone! Thanks again for having me

Welcome to the group Caldawg89

Thanks Terra1984

Welcome on board the thread Calda! I think we all struggle with giving ourselves unhelpful negative messages. I'm in the midst of a difficult rehab after a disabling illness, and I get down on myself a lot for putting so much stress on my husband. And when I hear even a hint of a criticism from one of my doctors, I obsess about it and repeat it to myself—and worse yet, out loud—over and over again.

For example, I really need to have my knees evaluated, since I can't get my legs straight, which makes standing up and walking quite painful. When my primary care doctor gave me the referral to a knee specialist, he warned me that they would no doubt hassle me about my weight. Instead of hearing that as a kind thing to say, to help me prepare for seeing the knee person, I heard it as criticism—so much so that I have been unable to pick up the phone and make an appointment with the knee person. I keep telling myself that I have to lose at least 50 more pounds before I even deserve to have my knees evaluated. =sigh=

I wish we all had guardian angels or something to help us out of those traps in our thinking...

Thanks Fiona W It is hard sometimes! I have PCOS, which sees my hormones fluctuate monthly which is far from ideal for weight loss. Add have tonsils, adenoids and gall bladder removed, along with acute pancreatitis, multiple organ failure and a torn back in the past 2 years.. well lets just say I haven't had the best time of it physically, and that has led my mental state to nosedive. I am hoping for a positive change this year! It is really nice to talk to people in the same boat as me. I always found gyms good for accountability but I hated the culture/vibe of the place, I always felt inferior there, and when I tore my back during a PT session, I just cannot bring myself to go back. The back pain I had when I tore my muscle was by far the worst pain I have ever endured, and I have broken bones and had further abdominal surgery in addition to the aforementioned surgeries and they felt like a grazed knee compared to how I felt when I tore my back. Fingers crossed 2016 is better for us! I have had at least 1 surgical procedure per year for the past few years, and I am hoping my body gives me a break from all of that in 2016! Best of luck when you see the knee person

P.S. to Calda: You can call me by my nickname, Fi (pronounced "fee"). Is it OK if I call you Calda? I much prefer real names or nicknames to userIDs: they're so much more friendly. =smile=

That's terrible about the torn muscle in your back! It makes me wonder about your PT person, that they let you stress your back so much. I can well believe it was awfully painful. Here's hopin' for all of us that in our efforts to get moving more in 2016, we take it slow and not overdo it!

Happy New Year. We're finally having a stretch of clear, sunny days but at this time of year that means that it's cold -- or at least cold by our standards since it's a temperate climate here in the Pacific Northwest.

Fi -- Having you back with us is such a treat -- what a great way to start out a new year. I'm impressed with your weight loss and totally understand your feelings regarding what the doctor was saying about getting your knees evaluated. It's a Catch 22 -- lose weight before getting knees fixed/with fixed knees I could be so much more active and lose weight more easily. Glad you're back in your studio and able to take showers. It's truly the little things in life that make such a huge difference in how we feel emotionally.

Ubee-- Happy New Year to you as well. Yes, I'm definitely going to make this the year to get below 300. In fact, I'm going to try to make this the 6 months of getting below 300. I'm planning a big trip to Alaska this summer, and want to be able to get out and about more easily. And you're right -- this needs to be a commitment as opposed to a resolution.

Terra -- Happy New Year. Staying on the path you're on makes perfect sense.

Calda -- First, welcome to the group. We are definitely supportive of each other and while we've all taken hiatuses of varying lengths of time, posting here definitely helps with staying focused. Your health issues add so many challenges to weight loss efforts. Hopefully, this year will be a much better one for you.

Sam -- Are you back from your vacation yet? We need our poster girl for successful weight loss here giving us support (and vice versa) and reminding us that this can be done.

It dawned on me this morning that it's now 3 years since I started trying to lose weight. The dark side of my brain basically says 3 years and you're only 40 pounds thinner. The light side said that at least I didn't repeat my pattern of gaining it all back and then some more. Just moving around is hard, constantly out of breath, etc. I'm going to start doing stretching exercises here at home each day along with going to the gym......and working on upping my cardio work. The eating part is ingrained in terms of what I can and can't eat.......now to overcome the one-little-cheat-won't-hurt mentality.

Going to clean the house today. Yesterday Toby got groomed -- or what passes for grooming by me. Not a lot going on here, but I'm enjoying a slower pace after the frenzy of the holidays.

Have a great day.

Hi everyone.
I was having a good day until I wasn't. I am going to get this weight off.
Betsy we are going to Alaska? I am so excited. How long will we be gone? Is anyone else coming along? I do think we need to give ourselves credit for the weight we have kept off. It would be ideal if we had kept it all off and reached our goal. I think something in us is broken. Every time we lose some and keep it off I feel like we are slowly fixing the part of us that is not working right. Does that make sense. Sorry it has been a long day.
Fi you deserve to have good knees! Just because we struggle with our weight it does not mean that we are not worthy of having the best life we can. Like Betsy says if your knees are better it will help with your weight loss.
Welcome caldawg! I am glad you decided to join us. You sure have a lot on your plate. Some here will be completely able to relate to you. Maybe try making some small simple goals to keep yourself inspired and motivated. Keep posting we all need to help each other.
Terra thanks for the reminder to get my water in. Have you tried any new exercise videos lately?

Yesterday I had a stellar day. This morning was good but as the day went on my diet became an epic fail. Time to get my head screwed on straight and get this weight off once and for all.

hi everyone!

Ubee— Thanks for the vote of confidence about Qi Gung. Mike is a wonderful guy, and we have something very important in common: rock-n-roll! He loves my collection of black T-shirts with guitarists on them, especially the one of Keith Richards in 1973. Mike is 5 years older than me (we're 60 & 65), which makes us pretty much the same age in terms of cultural references. He's teaching me how to fill up my inner reservoir of chi, and how to move chi down the channels in my legs. And he can do something that seems truly magical: he can take away the pain!! As for the kitties, they are doin' great. They still have snuffles and sneezes, something our vet calls "chronic rhinitis." Whatever—we don't mind having a little cat snot to deal with, and they don't seem to mind, either. They are healthy otherwise, still the best of friends, and happy & playful. Nénu is quite the little athlete: she doesn't jump into the very vertical cat tree we got for them—she flies! Her latest feat is leaping straight up to the top of the powder room door, then walking back & forth on that narrow (like 1" 1/2) platform like a tightrope artist, reaching up with one paw to touch the ceiling. I'll try to get some recent photos up soon... And congrats, Ubee, on your commitment to more movement and healthy eating in 2016! Here's something you won't like about my being back: I'm going to resume nagging you about lying on the couch or wherever and doing a brief session of long, slow, belly breaths to build up your willpower. It's also a part of what Mike emphasizes, because in Chinese body wiork you gotta have WILL to move that chi around. Qi Gung is big on breathing right. And you also gotta believe that what you're doing with your chi is going to help you. My favorite exchange with Mike so far: I asked him, "What is the role of belief in all this?" He answered, "Belief is the training wheels for intention." That applies to weight loss, too, doesn't it? Once you get that mental bicycle moving and you believe you're not going to fall off, you can ride as far as you want. Belief —> Will/Intention —> Movement & Eating Right —> Weight Loss. =smile=

Betsy— Thanks for the warm "Welcome back!" I take it you were on something of a hiatus yourself, so you know, too, what a big difference it makes to have the 300+ social support. Here's a thought: why don't you ask the experts at your gym about what do-able increase in your work there would be a safe, effective way to jump start your weight loss? The fact that you are going to the gym impresses me so much! I also love it that you are longwinded: you, Sam, and I are the big verbosity trio on this thread aren't we? Words and more words: great stuff, in my opinion! I gotta take issue with you, though, about one thing you said—that taking showers and getting to my studio are "little things." Taking showers—wonderful, and yes, a little thing. But getting into my studio and making collages—sorry, dear, but that's a BIG thing. Check this out: it's not much, aesthetically, but it's the first new card to come out of my studio! =big grin= (As always, click on "Comments" if you're interested, and click on the image for a bigger version.)

Sam— I am SO CHUFFED that you made it to the 100s! Please don't get discouraged if you bounce up and down a bit around 200 before you're securely into the 190s. How was your vacation? Please tell us all about what you've been up to, you gorgeous thing with the fab purple hair!

Terra, Melissa, Larry, Calda, Phat— Happy New Year yet again! What's up with you guys?

As for myself, I'm hopin' to get into the shower today (it's a challenge for my painful legs) and also to cut some fun shapes out of white sticky paper to put on the batch of patterned postcards I made a few days ago. But ugh—sitting up on the edge of the bed to write this posting on my iPad has been exhausting for my sore bod, so I gotta rest first....