i have the opposite problem of many here. a lot of people have spouses, boyfriends, etc. who sabotage their weight loss. well, i'm on my own...been living by myself for years, no boyfriend, haven't dated in a while, last long relationship was a while ago and that was long distance, etc. so basically it's just me. and aside from it being lonely, i think it's bad for my eating habits. well, i'd say 90% of the time it's good because whatever i decide is on the menu, that's it. i have no one else to answer to. i can eat the whole box of strawberries if i want, since it's only 150 calories for the whole box and i don't have to save any for anyone else. that's healthy. but i can also eat the whole carton of ice cream, and no one will know...not so healthy. and i don't have to keep structured meal times. even at work, my work is pretty independent so i can eat whatever, whenever i want. so all day and all night, i can eat whenever i want. NOT GOOD. this is 100% my fault. but sometimes it seems kind of sad. it's like, on top of being lonely because i'm single, i ALSO have to deal with the effects it has on my weight loss. can anyone else relate?

I can relate - I find it difficult to want to cook meals for just myself - its much easier to order take out - In order to "fix" this, I've started preparing my meals for the week on a Sunday and freezing individual portions. As to the loneliness aspect, I surround myself with friends to keep me from getting lonely and turning to food. Do you have supportive friends in your life that you can spend time with to help you through?

Whether we are single or , it all comes down to us individuals. We all have to make choices about food every day, and there is really nobody that can make us eat what we should and in the correct amounts.

I had the opposite problem - I gained a bunch of weight in my relationships because there was an increase in going out to dinners. I also didn't go to the gym as much so I could spend more time with my boyfriends, and with my husband, I would cook a lot and serve us both the same portions...which was NOT good as I am not a 6'3" active male...

Single or in a relationship, eating right is HARD and it comes down to you - not single you or relationship you.

I'm the same way. It's easiest for me to have a freezer full of meals I've cooked and portioned out. I also can meal plan easiest by myself, and there are no temptations at home because nobody brought in foods that I have difficulty with.

I think there are plus sides to being single but things such as "Planovers" for meal planing don't work for me because I have a roomate that basically expects me to feed her if there is "left over" food. But when she is away I like the absolute control I have.

Being single doesn't mean I eat out less me and my other single friends are bad influences on each other I guess. I would be more motivated to stay home and cook for a boyfriend whereas its really easy to meet friends at a restaurant and everyone can get what they want.

I actually found being healthy easier when I was single because I didn't have to take other people's tastes in food into account and if I wanted to make a dinner 100% vegetarian I could, for example. I also exercised more and got more sleep when I was single.

I think what is key is what you bring into the house, if you have a weakness for some things. For me, the best way for me to grocery shop is right after I've eaten. If I'm full and satisfied, I'm far less likely to toss junk I don't really want or need into the cart. If I'm hungry, watch out- I'll buy everything that looks tasty. Maybe you could try that. I find if I have to get in the car and go to the store to buy what I have a craving for, I'm not very likely to do it.

Well, I am married - with kids but there still remains a free for all. If I wanted all of the icecream -I could totally eat it while DH was at work and kids in school. I can prepare meals for my kids but I could eat something different than they do. For that matter I can eat icecream in front of my handsome thin husband - but he wouldn't say anything. Remind yourself it's about willpower. You can do it. You can eat healthy and a little treat now and then is fine too - I'm learning moderation right now. I used to be able to put away 10 oreos at one sitting. Now I can treat myself to one or maybe 2 - and that's it - I don't even want more than that...and I'm still on track and have lost 16 pounds since May 25th. Willpower is your friend!

I find the opposite to be true for me. I am also single and I prep food in advance, eats salads with chicken or other left over meat several nights a week, and never have to cater to anyone else but me (except when DD is home or family is visiting - I'm not a hermit!) I thought it was incredibly easy to stay on plan under these circumstances - just don't bring the junk into the house. Ever. Unless you're prepared to ration it sensibly or pay the consequences for eating it all at once. You can do it.

Lin

You consider that a pigout? You should meet my kids (or my former self).

:-) F.

I find being single difficult, but like some other responders, I find the food part easier. I don't go out on dates (and don't go out very often with others period, how sad is that), so I don't have to make difficult restaurant food choices. I choose what I want to eat every day and don't have to worry about other people's preferences.

When I was living with a roommate (who was never around) in college a few years back I found it much easier to eat better. Actually I think for the most part I just ate less. I only had to cater to MY appetite, which when I'm busy drops. Between classes and socializing food just wasn't a big part of my day.

I found now that I'm a wife and mum (and trained chef) SOOOO much of my day revolves around food. Both my husband and daughter eat a TON. He's very active and she's growing. So I have to cater to their appetites and I found myself matching them plate for plate.

Also the husband has a sweet tooth. 10 oreos are nothing to him, try a dozen donuts in one sitting, frequently. Doesn't gain a lb though. I wouldn't even think about donuts if it wasn't for him, and I've found myself beside him on the couch scarfing them down.

I agree with previous posters, it comes down to being responsible for you. It's easy to follow those around us or indulge because no one knows. But we have to be accountable to ourselves.

While I can't relate, I think you've provided some insight that might be worth exploring when you say "...on top of being lonely because I'm single, and ALSO have to deal with the effects it has on my weight loss." These really good things to know abut yourself. I, too, am single but have almost never been lonely. I have wonderful friends, a job I enjoy (even if I am overworked and my colleagues annoy me at times ), and engaging in activities I truly love and enjoy.

You mentioned your single status; do you want to date, or have you tried different avenues to meet someone? Do feel you're too heavy to date at this time (not true for any of us btw)? How are your friendships? How do you spend your time outside of work? Are you doing things that you enjoy? When was the last time you did something that you've always wanted to do but couldn't for one reason or another? I want to stress that you can be just as lonely in a relationship as you can without one. Wow, do I know this!

All of us build the life we want. And like someone else said in their post, being single or in a relationship (married or dating), comes with advantages and disadvantages. As a single woman I love that I'm not accountable to anyone about my diet, exercise, and recreational time. If others aren't dependent on my plans, or I on theirs, I'm free to make my all the decisions. I like that. For me, my singleness empowers me. I began my weight loss journey over three years ago. In this time, I've cleaned up my diet, exercise regularly, took up running, and have transformed myself. But in addition to these outward manifestations of weight loss, I took the time to strike at the heart of the things that were bothering me that I had never addressed but led me to eat volumes of food. I can be passive-aggressive, I procrastinate, at times I over-rationalize, and through the process of keeping a journal and getting honest with myself I realized that there was a part of me that wanted to fail, in a big, bad way. If I failed I had a convenient excuse to fall back on. Inside my warped head, out of the billions of people on the planet, I didn't deserve to succeed or be happy. And if I didn't deserve it, I had every reason in the world to continue my life as it was. I still struggle but I'm also still working on these and other not so great aspects of me

At any rate, I think you're on to something. I hope you can come to see this time in your life as an advantage to continue to do work on yourself. In all honesty, I do not think I could have been as successful with my journey if I had been a relationship. Of course I'll never know, but this is what I suspect. Choose NOT to eat the ice-cream because you KNOW you can make a better choice. When you do choose the ice-cream, cake, etc...do so because it is your choice and take full responsibility for it. No guilt, no judgmental dialogue with yourself, no disgust. You made a choice, you can live with it, it is over, moving on! If you need to, find additional support for your weigh loss efforts. Posting here is an excellent place to be reminded that there are others who have been in the exact same position and want to offer support.

I think it's always better to know more about a situation rather than less. The added advantage of this is that in this long process you become the person that you envision yourself to be, but also prepare yourself for the outstanding spouse, boyfriend, partner, etc. that you desire.

Lost 102 pounds as a single woman, now fighting the 5-10 lb gain since in a relationshipt when I really wanted to get off 20 more lbs. For me I found it much easier to eat and exercise on plan when my life was just me.

Definitely. I don't know how my weightloss journey would be different if I had a roommate/S.O. who saw what I eat but I do know that I'd still ultimately be responsible for myself.

It can be difficult at times, feeling alone in this process, but that's what 3FC is such a great place. I hope you find the support you're missing!